The TEST

We may not be the best when we stand alone but….

Story: the test.

As the story goes…

When Tony was a kid he and his Uncle were in the backyard clearing rocks one day so they could make space to build a nice deck.

At one point when his Uncle was taking a break Tony came across a large rock which he couldn’t budge. He pushed it, kicked it, and tried to use a big stick as leverage to move it, but nothing worked.

His Uncle was watching from a window in the house and asked Tony if he was using all of his strength to move the rock.

“Yes, I am,” Tony said.

“No, I don’t think you are” his Uncle said back.

“I don’t understand” Tony replied.

That’s when Tony’s Uncle returned to the backyard and said, “Tony, I know for a fact you have not used ALL your strength to remove the rock, because you haven’t asked me to help you yet.”

That’s when Tony’s Uncle grabbed a shovel and told him to always remember;

T.E.A.M: Together – Everyone – Achieves – More.

The End.

MORAL OF THE STORY: The maximum strength any of us will ever experience is when we reach out for help and form a team.

tap into inborn power.

Ask for help.

Work together

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How The Hikers Faced A Deadly Problem

This story consists of a PROBLEM, a QUESTION, A SOLUTION.

The PROBLEM:

A long time ago deep in the forest Water, Fire and “X” went on a long hike.

As they started they had a safety conversation about what they would do if they ended up separated from one another and lost.

Water said, “If we get separated at any time just look for the dark green grass and I’ll be there.”

Fire said, “If we get separated at any time just look for the smoke and I’ll be there.”

Then “X” said, “Well, you better hope to never lose me because if you do you’ll have a big problem and you may never find me again.”

The QUESTION:

What is “X”?

————————-

The SOLUTION:

“X” = TRUST

Because if you lose trust you may never find it again. Trust is like a statue. Once it’s broken it can be fixed, but that statue will never be the same again. It’s original integrity is now dead.

The End.

MORAL OF THE STORY: We must all give trust. Earn trust. And live a trustworthy life. That’s a major aspect of living as the most complete version or ourselves.

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Choose wisely

How The Crying Bunny Faced Doom …
As the story goes…

One day an old wise bear and a young cub were walking through the forest.

It had recently stormed and they came about a huge pond of water. It wasn’t too deep for them to pass but they did spot a stranded and scared bunny shaking in front of the new pond.

The young cub said to the old wise bear, “Look, it’s a bunny. It’s trapped. It’s crying. It’s not moving. Let’s kill it!”

The old wise bear ignored the cub’s words and walked over to the bunny. He then picked it up, put it on his back, and crossed the pond all the way to the other side.

After that the bunny smiled and hopped down off the old wise bears’ back and excitedly scurried into the woods. From there the two bears continued their walk in silence until they reached the den and the rest of their pack.

Then later that night the young cub approached the wise old bear and asked, “Excuse me sir, but as bears aren’t we supposed to hunt, kill, and eat easy targets like that crying bunny today and not carry it to safety?”

The old wise bear answered while eating some berries for dinner, “Yes, young cub, I suppose we could’ve done that.”

Then the young cub asked the old wise bear again, “I’ve been thinking about this so much that I can’t even eat dinner. Why is it that you carried that bunny across the pond today?”

The old wise bear answered, “It’s true that I helped the bunny across the pond today,

I didn’t kill as it wasn’t necessary neither were we hungry

but you’re the one who is still carrying it around from the past and allowing it to affect your present and spoil you dinner and appetite. Let it go and we’ll see what comes of it tomorrow.”

The End.

MORAL OF THE STORY: As we aim to live as the most complete version of ourselves, sometimes we just need to show compassion and know the difference between being right or correct and being kind and nice and choose better

Life is nothing series of options that we exercise

Choose love as swadharma

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punish

    To burn with desire and keep quiet about it is the greatest punishment we can bring on ourselves.

roar….and act.. and get it done

Federico García Lorca, Blood Wedding and Yerma

festival of democracy -indian elections

but only to be addressed with short-term solutions. Issues that call for long-term solutions and bold structural changes have been conveniently and cleverly brushed under the carpet by all parties in their pursuit of power. The underlying disturbing logic is very simple. Even if elected to power, no major party is prepared or equipped to address deep-rooted social and economic issues, potent with disastrous consequences.    

This is an attempt to identify five major areas this election campaign conveniently forgot to address. (Admittedly there are many more.)  


1. Climate change and environment:Confronted with the unmistakable truth of climate change, the whole world is bracing itself up with mitigating measures and eco-sensitive policies. When the time is up to dedicate ourselves to a new eco-sensitivity and a nuanced development ethos, we seem to have fallen foolishly in love with a discarded development model that has taken humanity to the brink of ecocide. No national leader acknowledged the reality of climate change. Instead, we continue to promise more ‘development’ which shall guarantee our hurtle towards ecological disaster. 

2. Corruption: Though allegations of corruption were levelled by national and regional leaders at each other with considerable creativity and effective histrionics, the net result has been the dilution of the moral pungency of corruption in nation’s collective conscience. Unfortunately, no leader appeared to be convincingly impatient with the pervasive cloud of corruption. We witnessed no committed attack on the thousand-headed monster of corruption nor heard any meaningful and well thought out strategy to create a corruption-free India. 

3. Governance: Every successive government has been high on promises and low on delivery. And the fault line of administrative inefficiency has been thwarting scheme after schemes for several decades. Yet the make-believe machinery of the governments covers the lifeless bodies of half accomplished schemes with the shiny apparel of flamboyant post-truth claims. Hardly any leader spoke in this election campaign about the inadequacy of governance. Poor governance continues to manifest itself all around in bureaucratic apathy and political indifference, reinforced by archaic rules and procedures and even more archaic mindset. If no party vows to change this where does an ordinary citizen look for administrative justice? 

4. Affordable Healthcare: Insurance-linked healthcare seems to have been accepted as the only available model. It might have its set of positive aspects. Yet that is no reason for the state to withdraw from universal healthcare and affordable treatment to the economically and socially marginalised.  In a country where literacy is still a mirage for a sizeable population, insurance-driven health care is nothing but a barren cloud. When the real need for treatment arises the cloud would have disappeared. In an increasingly commercialising health sector, the only real insurance is a vibrant public health infrastructure. 

5. Education: Another area that the campaign overlooked is the abysmal record of our education. School enrolment has shown some signs of change but the quality and coverage still remain incomplete. It is a patchwork picture of small successes dominated by huge failures. Teacher absenteeism, poor quality of classroom transaction and the problem of drop-out continue to plague our school education. University education scene is no better. The gap between public institutions of higher education and privately funded universities and institutions has been widening as the marks on the surface of an enlarging balloon. This unequal system has already created a new hierarchy among the educated people.

Evidently, these are not vote-catching issues. That itself betrays a poor idea of the electorate as conceived by the political class. It presumes that the voter too is not interested in such core issues but concerned only about short term issues and immediate gains. Therefore the rhetoric gets centered on issues which will have an immediate ‘effect’ and electoral dividend. Deeper issues demanding serious structural changes are always postponed and later ignored as they have apparently no immediate nudging effect on the voter.  Problems that cannot be addressed with simplistic solutions are thus ignored and a malady ignored can only worsen.  So like the mythical bird, we the people wait. Wait for the next rains to quench the thirst.

K jayakumar

Former Chief Secretary to Government of Kerala and former Vice Chancellor of Malayalam University

right wrong person

    We’re all seeking that special person who is right for us. But if you’ve been through enough relationships, you begin to suspect there’s no right person, just different flavors of wrong. Why is this? Because you yourself are wrong in some way, and you seek out partners who are wrong in some complementary way. But it takes a lot of living to grow fully into your own wrongness. And it isn’t until you finally run up against your deepest demons, your unsolvable problems—the ones that make you truly who you are—that we’re ready to find a lifelong mate. Only then do you finally know what you’re looking for. You’re looking for the wrong person. But not just any wrong person: it’s got to be the right wrong person—someone you lovingly gaze upon and think, “This is the problem I want to have.”
    I will find that special person who is wrong for me in just the right way.
Andrew Boyd, Daily Afflictions: The Agony of Being Connected to Everything in the Universe

speak

    When I pronounce the word Future,

    the first syllable already belongs to the past.

    When I pronounce the word Silence,

    I destroy it.

Wisława Szymborska, Poems New and Collected

so.. why speak ..even if it is about silence.. be quiet with quietness around…

what am i here for

    Time is your most precious gift because you only have a set amount of it. You can make more money, but you can’t make more time. When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you’ll never get back. Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give someone is your time.

    It is not enough to just say relationships are important; we must prove it by investing time in them. Words alone are worthless. “My children, our love should not be just words and talk; it must be true love, which shows itself in action.” Relationships take time and effort, and the best way to spell love is “T-I-M-E.
Rick Warren, The Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth Am I Here for?

what am i here for

    Time is your most precious gift because you only have a set amount of it. You can make more money, but you can’t make more time. When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you’ll never get back. Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give someone is your time.

    It is not enough to just say relationships are important; we must prove it by investing time in them. Words alone are worthless. “My children, our love should not be just words and talk; it must be true love, which shows itself in action.” Relationships take time and effort, and the best way to spell love is “T-I-M-E.
Rick Warren, The Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth Am I Here for?

joy

    These are the few ways we can practice humility:
    To speak as little as possible of one’s self.
    To mind one’s own business.
    Not to want to manage other people’s affairs.
    To avoid curiosity.
    To accept contradictions and correction cheerfully.
    To pass over the mistakes of others.
    To accept insults and injuries.
    To accept being slighted, forgotten and disliked.
    To be kind and gentle even under provocation.
    Never to stand on one’s dignity.
    To choose always the hardest.
Mother Teresa, The Joy in Loving: A Guide to Daily Living

relationship

    LOVE IS A FLOWER
    Treat your relationship

    As if you are growing

    The most beautiful sacred flower.

    Keep watering it,

    Tend to the roots,

    And always make sure

    The petals are full of color

    And are never curling.

    Once you neglect your plant,

    It will die,

    As will your relationship.
Suzy Kassem

meditate

Life comes with its fair share of stress and anxiety, from money and career worries to relationships and a constant barrage of distractions through which to navigate. So it’s no wonder that many people seek the solace of psychotherapy to help sort through it all and see things more clearly.
meditation is all about bringing yourself into the present.
However, being present is easier said than done. For most of us, it’s downright difficult to simply sit quietly and not obsess over past regrets or future worries.
There are two primary reasons why the brain prefers to stay away from the present.
The first is that it’s new and unpredictable. Our various senses are picking up new stimuli every moment, which means our sensations are constantly changing from one moment to the next.
Second, when there’s something unpleasant, the brain returns to old, familiar thoughts. So, rather than deal with the scary, new, unpredictable present, it retreats to the reliable mental terrain of common anxieties.
When given a choice of activities to do with your free time, you might not think meditation sounds all that exciting. However, while it may not have the same reputation as mountain climbing or windsurfing, meditation is a way to live your life to the fullest

understand that meditation isn’t a separate experience or escape from the mundane realities of life. On the contrary, meditation is a way to fully engage with the present moment, even if it’s an unpleasant one

Nevertheless, meditation isn’t a way to build up walls that keep your obligations at bay. It’s a way of learning how to be present and in the moment – whether that moment is a difficult dispute with your partner or a wondrous view from the peak of a picturesque mountaintop.

Mindfulness is a useful form of meditation, but it’s best not to overdo it.

Whereas many forms of meditation involve focusing the mind on one thing, be it a mantra or a candle, mindfulness is about opening yourself up to all sensations while allowing them to pass and not fixating on any one thing.

Find a quiet spot to sit down, preferably early in the morning. Once you’re comfortable, focus your attention on one thing only. It can be the rhythm of your breathing or a sound, like a metronome
After counting a couple of sets of in-breaths and out-breaths, many people will find their thoughts straying to whatever is going on at work or with their loved ones – or their dinner plans.
A wandering mind is normal, especially early on – the important thing is to stick with it and calmly bring your attention back to the breathing. If it goes astray again, bring it back and keep doing this for a significant period. Beginners should start off with five- to ten-minute daily sessions and gradually expand over time to a full hour whenever possible

One of the unique benefits of meditation is that it allows you to take a closer look at your thought patterns and identify the recurring ones.
For example, as you meditate, you might notice that you’re often quite hard on yourself, with recurring thoughts that you’re not good enough, not getting enough done or other thoughts that generally reflect low self-esteem.
When you create a meditative gap, it gives you the chance to sit with the sadness, process the emotion, understand where it’s coming from and how to better react.
One of the best tools that meditation provides is how it can shift your focus and thereby pacify, or calm, an anxious mind.

analytical, and often anxious, mind is separate from our consciousness, which is how we experience the world around us. 

Meditation provides a calm space to see the real motivations behind relationship conflicts.

If you’ve been in an argument with a loved one, you know how it can feel like a matter of life and death when you’re in the middle of it. But if you were to reflect on these arguments later on, you would probably see that many were blown out of proportion, with no real reason for such heated emotions.

Meditation can allow you to break free of long-held misconceptions.

Along with misplacing our anger toward a loved one, we also often have a tendency to think that someone is angry with us when they’re just in a bad mood or not thinking about us at all. And what’s really sad is that these misunderstandings can last for years.
There are a variety of ways to practice meditation, and each one has its benefits, but it is important to remember that none of these practices are about forgetting or avoiding life’s problems. 

luv n grace

The Road Less Traveled is a spiritual classic, combining scientific and religious views to help you grow by confronting and solving your problems through discipline, love and grace
Here are 3 lessons from the first three categories he discusses:
    Stay open to change your perspective of reality at any moment.

    The action of loving is much more important than the feeling, which is fleeting.

    We’re all religious, because religion is nothing more than a distinct perception of the world.
Always be willing to update your view of the world.
When we lie, consciously or not, we’ve often just fallen prey to so-called cognitive biases, like the backfire effect, survivorship bias or irrational escalation. 

What matters, he suggests is that we remain open to being wrong. How willing are you to change your opinion at a moment’s notice? It’s hard. It takes a lot of humility.

Love is an action, not a feeling.
 cathexis. It’s defined as the investment of emotional energy into an object or a person, often to an extent that’s unhealthy
If our love is genuine, it won’t require lots of feelings at all, since it’s much bigger than cathexis.For example, in a well-functioning marriage both partners continue to choose their spouse, because they made a commitment to support that person and strive towards their goals together. Even if they disagree and occasionally get angry at each other, they don’t get swayed by those passing feelings

In this sense, showing your love is as simple as giving your attention, listening and helping your partner reach their goals.

similar to the distinction Jonathan Haidt made in The Happiness Hypothesis between passionate and companionate love

Religion is just a way of viewing the world, which means we all have one.
We mostly view religion as a set of strict rules and traditional rituals that a certain group follows in order to worship a or multiple deities.
Our perspective of life is mostly shaped by our education in school and at home, as well as the family environment we grow up in.

Peck also describes grace as a mysterious force of positive growth in our lives. It universally adds serendipity in ways we can’t quite explain and thus comes as close to a miracle as it gets. 

parable -fortune

Fortune?
Once upon the time there was an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. “Such bad luck,” they said sympathetically.
“Perhaps,” the farmer replied.
The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it three other wild horses. “What great luck!” the neighbors exclaimed.
“Perhaps,” replied the old man.
The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The neighbors again came to offer their sympathy on his misfortune.
“Perhaps,” answered the farmer.
The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army. Seeing that the son’s leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out.
“Perhaps,” said the farmer…


We’ve all had experiences where the curse turns into a blessing; rejection turns into redirection, and the unanswered prayer is the best thing that could’ve happened to you.
Life is indeed a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get. Yet the father isn’t delusional or apathetic, but equanimous through life’s ups and downs. And there’s a subtle expectation that fortune will follow his misfortune.

parable -wolves

Wolves.
An old Cherokee chief was teaching his grandson about life…
“A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy. “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil. He is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt, and ego. The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. This same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather,

“Which wolf will win?”
The old chief simply replied,

“The one you feed.”


It’s no surprise that expressing gratitude increases positive experiences. Focusing on something causes your brain’s reticular activating system (RAS) to red-flag all things related. If your default is toward negativity, you’ll always see the glass half empty. Start feeding the good wolf to not only see, but live the silver lining.

parable let go

Here are three timeless parables that will challenge and change the way you live life.

1. The Muddy Road.
Two monks, Tanzan and Ekido were once traveling together down a muddy road. A heavy rain was still falling.
Coming around a bend, they met a lovely girl in a silk kimono and sash, unable to cross the intersection.
“Come on, girl,” said Tanzan at once. Lifting her in his arms, he carried her over the mud.
Ekido did not speak again until that night when they reached a lodging temple. Then he no longer could restrain himself.
“We monks don’t go near females,” he told Tanzan, “especially not young and lovely ones. It is dangerous. Why did you do that?”
“I left the girl there,” said Tanzan. “Are you still carrying her?”


Letting go can be difficult, but you’ll torture yourself mentally and emotionally by holding on. Breathe deep, and let it go. Life doesn’t always follow the script; rules are bent and broken; the ideal doesn’t match the real. But carrying wounds long after the battle is done is a mark of immaturity.

corp parable 1

Stevens Computing Services  –  Humor me!
Corporate Parables

Four Basic Management Lessons:

Lesson Number One

    A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.  A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?”
    The crow answered: “Sure, why not.”
    So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.
    All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
   Management Lesson
    To be sitting around, doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Number Two
    A turkey was chatting with a bull.  “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the energy.”
    “Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?”, replied the bull.  “They’re packed with nutrients.”
    The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.  The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
    Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.  Soon, he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
   Management Lesson
    Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.
Lesson Number Three
    A woman was leaving the shower just as her husband was ready to enter it, when the doorbell rang.  She quickly wrapped herself in a towel and ran downstairs.
    When she opened the door, there stood Bob, the next-door neighbor.  Before she could say a word, Bob said, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.”
    After thinking for a moment, the woman dropped her towel and stood naked before Bob.  After a few seconds, Bob handed her $800 and left.
    The woman wrapped herself in the towel again and went back upstairs.  When she got to the bathroom, her husband asked, “Who was that?”
    “It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replied.
    “Great,” said the husband, “did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”
   Management Lesson
    You may not be able to prevent avoidable exposure if you fail to disclose critical information pertaining to credit and risk to your shareholders in a timely manner.
Lesson Number Four
    When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss.
    The brain said, “I should be Boss because I control the whole body’s responses and functions.”
    The feet said, “We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go.”
    The hands said, “We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money.”
    And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up.  All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss.
    So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.  Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.
    Eventually they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed.
    All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat around and passed out the shit!
   Management Lesson
    You don’t need brains to be the Boss – any asshole will do.
Lesson Number Five
    A little bird was flying south for the winter.  It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field.  While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it.  As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was.  The dung was actually thawing him out!  He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
    A passing cat heard the bird’s singing and came to investigate.  Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!
   Management Lessons
    1)  Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy.

    2)  Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.

    3)  And when you’re in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!
 

tiny habbits

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48 Tiny Habits That Will Make You Awesome

Go to the profile of Patrik Edblad

Patrik Edblad

Mar 21, 2017

I don’t expect you to follow all of these habits, nor do I do it myself.

But hopefully, you’ll find one or two that will enrich your life.
If you do that, I consider this article a success.
Here we go!
Do the gratitude snooze. The key to happiness is to want what you already have. So, instead of hitting the snooze button and going back to sleep, spend the first few minutes of your day in gratitude (1). Think about all the blessing in your life, big and small, that you tend to take for granted. That simple practice will help rewire your brain for positivity.
Reset your expectations. Begin each day like the Roman emperor and Stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius: ”When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: The people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous, and surly. They are like this because they can’t tell good from evil.” (2) People aren’t perfect, so you shouldn’t expect them to act perfectly. Set your expectations straight every morning, and you’ll suffer a lot less during the day.
Do a high-intensity interval training. Physical exercise isn’t just important for your health. New research has found that it’s also crucial for mental aspects such as your brain’s ability to learn (3). If you’re a busy person, I highly recommend the 7-minute workout. It’s challenging but effective and extremely time efficient.
Meditate. It’s crazy how many benefits this simple practice has. Among many other things, regular meditators experience less stress and anxiety, better sleep, sharper mental focus, and deeper relationships (4). So, learn how to do basic mindfulness meditation. It’s well worth the time and effort.
Use mindfulness triggers. Decide on a particular set of habits you do every day and let them trigger moments of mindfulness. These could be, for example, doing the dishes, showering, or brushing your teeth. Allow yourself to be fully present during these activities.
Take cold showers. Challenging and uncomfortable to say the least. But the benefits speak for themselves. Cold showers burn fat, strengthens immunity and circulation, increases mood and alertness, and refines your hair and skin (5). Plus, it’s an excellent way to boost your mental toughness.
Eat mindfully. Turn off the TV and radio. Put away newspapers and magazines. Then eat your breakfast slowly and mindfully. Not only will the food taste better, but it also helps you absorb the nutrients better and makes it less likely that you’ll overeat (6).
Breathe deeply. Whenever you’re feeling stressed or anxious, pause for a minute and follow this sequence: Inhale in for 3 seconds → Pause for 1 second → Exhale for 5 seconds. Repeat this cycle five times, and you’ll feel calmer in less than a minute (7).
Relieve stress with cuteness. Watching a video of a cute animal can reduce heart rate and blood pressure in under a minute (8). So, if you’re not a fan of breathing exercises, you can always watch Ichi the Bitchy.
Reinforce your goals. If you’re serious about accomplishing your long-term goals, you can’t state them once a year and then forget about them. You need to remind yourself of the direction you want to go every day. Turn your goals into brain tattoos by writing them down in a journal every single day.
Use the “5-second rule.” Whenever you have an impulse to act on a goal, physically move within five seconds. Introduce yourself, raise your hand, step into the cold shower, or do whatever else you need to do to get closer to your goal. But do it before your brain kills your good intentions with fear (9).
Use the ”Eisenhower Box.” Sort your daily tasks into one of the following possibilities:
• Urgent and important. Do these things immediately.
• Important, but not urgent. Put these things in your schedule.
• Urgent, but not important. Delegate these things to someone else.
• Neither urgent nor important. Eliminate these things.
It will help you prioritize what’s important and make you much more productive.
Decide your 3 ”MIT:s.” Each morning (or the night before), choose three things you must accomplish during the day to consider it a success. Then focus all your energy on these three tasks before doing anything else.
Use the ”2-minute rule.” This is the only exception to the rule above. If something takes less than two minutes, then do it immediately (10).
Say no. A lot of people complain about not having enough time. But it’s not that we don’t have enough time that’s the problem — it’s that we waste so much of it (11). So, be protective of your time. It’s either “HELL YEAH!” or “no.”
Do a weekly review. Set aside a few minutes at the end of each week to reflect on your progress. Celebrate your successes, big or small, and think about what you can improve for next week.
See the big picture. Whenever you’re about to do some demanding work, take a moment to think about how it will make someone’s life easier. It’ll give you a deeper sense of meaning and help you stay motivated. (Note: I found this one very helpful when using this article .)
Put yourself in ”monk mode.” If you want to be highly productive, you need to work for long stretches in deep, undisturbed focus(12). So, close your door, put your phone in ”do not disturb” mode, turn off notifications on your computer, and block distracting websites before diving into your work.
Play the ”email game.” Once you’ve completed your deep work, you can use email as a reward. The email game will help you move quickly and decisively through each message. And it’s fun!
Stand up. Seriously, sitting down all day is terrible for your health (13). So, interrupt your sitting as much as possible. Set an alarm to remind you to get up and move around. If possible, use a standing desk.
Strike a pose. Whenever you’re feeling nervous about a social encounter of some sort, use a powerful posture. Take up space and exude confidence. Doing that for just a couple of minutes will significantly increase your testosterone (”the dominance hormone”) while decreasing your levels of cortisol (”the stress hormone”). That will help you calm down and feel more confident (14).
Run the “doorway drill.” Each time you walk through a door, straighten yourself up, smile, and hold your head high. By doing that, you’ll train yourself to enter rooms with a magnetic confidence (15).
Hug someone. Human beings are wired for social connection and intimacy. Hugging releases hormones like oxytocin and dopamine that makes us calm down and feel connected. So, always choose a hug over a handshake (when appropriate). 🙂
Practice being charismatic. Whenever you engage with other people, remember the three core behaviors of charisma: Presence, Power, and Warmth (16). Be 100% engaged in the conversation, use a powerful body language, and be genuinely concerned with helping the other person.
Don’t be interesting, be interested. In a world where almost everyone is constantly talking about themselves, people appreciate a good listener. If you want people to like you, more often than not, all you have to do is let them talk (17).
Give credit. According to behavioral economists, few things motivate people as much as being given credit for good work (18). And few things feel as good as complementing others for a job well done. So, give credit where credit’s due. If you’ve read a great book, email the author. If you’ve listened to a helpful podcast, send a tweet to the host. It will encourage them to keep doing great work — and it will make you feel great.
Be impeccable with your word. Never say anything about someone that you wouldn’t say straight to their face (19). This is a great way to practice personal integrity.
Take one picture every day. Pictures have the curious effect that they increase in value with time. A picture with your friends today might not seem that special, but 20 years from now, it will be a treasure. So, start building your visual autobiography today. Take one picture every day and store them in an app like Day One. In a couple of years, you’ll be so glad you did. And so will your friends and family.
Enroll in ”Toilet University.” If you spend 15 on the toilet every day reading on your phone, that translates into 90+ hours every year. That’s plenty of time to build your expertise. So, delete time-wasting apps and instead use that time to take online courses or read great book summaries. ”Never throne without something of educational value”! (20)
Savor your experiences. Eating something good? Say mmm. Stretching out in bed? Say aah. Allow yourself to indulge in the small, daily miracles of your life and they’ll become much more pleasurable (21).
Ban ”victim speech.” Your words become your reality, so choose them wisely. Instead of saying “I can’t,” say “I won’t.” Instead of “I have to,” say “I’m going to.” Instead of “I don’t know,” say “I’ll figure it out.” Never speak of yourself as a victim, else you’ll become one (22).
Have an ”end-of-workday routine.” At the end of your workday, take a few minutes to get any lingering tasks out of your head and down on paper. Schedule your most important stuff for the next day. Try to truly finish up so you can be completely present when you get home.
Put your phone away. The average smartphone user checks their phone 221 times a day. That behavior has become a significant problem in modern relationships as people feel neglected by their spouses and friends. Scientists even have a name for it; ”phubbing,” which is a combination of the words ”phone” and ”snubbing.” (23) So, put your phone in another room. Your relationships will benefit from it.
”Stop. Look. Go.” Take the time to soak in the small miracles of life. If you come across a beautiful night sky, a bird singing beautifully, or someone doing an act of kindness, let it touch you. Take a minute, or a couple of seconds if that’s all you have, to experience the moment fully before getting on with your day (24).
Set up your own ”smile therapy.” We all know that when we feel happy, we smile. But did you know that it works the other way around, too? When you smile, you tell your nervous system that you’re happy, and that makes you feel good (25). So, create your own daily smile therapy.
Do the ”misery dance.” This habit is closely related to the smile therapy. You can use it whenever life throws it’s minor annoyances at you. Did the paper get stuck in the printer? Do a silly misery dance for a couple of seconds (26). That can be enough to interrupt a negative thinking pattern and instantly make you feel better. Fair warning: People may think you’re a nut.
Adopt the ”Walk in the door rule.” No matter what your day has been like, always tell your family/friends/cat about the best thing that happened that day as soon as you walk in the door (27). That is a powerful little habit that can transform the way you communicate with your loved ones.
Use ”temptation bundling.” I used to loath housekeeping chores until I found this simple strategy (28). What you do is couple something you need to do with something you want to do. These days, I actually look forward to doing laundry (something I need to do) because it means I get to listen to an awesome audiobook (something I want to do). Combine your chores with a reward, and they’ll become much easier to do.
Do a 5-minute declutter. Spend just a couple of minutes a day getting rid of some clutter. That could be physical clutter like clothes and stuff you never use or digital clutter like icons and apps that are filling your screens. Delete, throw it out, or give it away.
Practice ”voluntary discomfort.” Do something every day that makes you uncomfortable. Underdress for cold weather, go without a meal, sleep without a pillow, or something that brings discomfort (29). You’ll get better at doing things you don’t want to do and that, as it happens, is the key to success.
Help someone. The late, great Zig Ziglar used to say “You can have everything in life you want if you will just help other people get what they want.” (30) I’ve found this to be very true in my life. The more people I help, the more opportunities come my way. Reach out and help someone every day. Lend a hand, send an email, answer a Quora question. The good intentions you put out will come back to you.
Set an evening alarm clock. Have it go off one hour before bed. When it rings, turn off all your screens and read a couple of pages in a fiction book. It will help you sleep better.
Take the ”view from above.” Whenever you’re struggling or feel overwhelmed, look up at the sky. Zoom out from your problems and widen your perspective to cosmic dimensions. Ponder the infinite universe and that the light from the stars that is hitting your eyes is so old that some of them don’t exist anymore. It will make your personal problems seem a lot less important (31).
Create a ”Jar of Awesome.” Whenever something awesome happens to you, big or small, write it down on a piece of paper and put in your jar. Then, whenever you’re feeling down, open the jar and read the notes. You’ll feel much better (32).
Practice ”negative visualization.” Take some time every day to imagine what your life would have been like without the blessings you tend to take for granted. What would your situation look like if you lost your health, your home, or your friend? Contemplating these things from time to time makes you appreciate them much more (33).
Use ”mini-actions” to break bad habits. Pre-commit to a particular behavior to engage in every time you start craving your bad habit. For example, each time you feel like smoking a cigarette, play Tetris for five minutes instead. Cravings usually only last a few minutes, so a ”mini-action” can be all you need to overcome them (34).
Create a ”token economy” to motivate yourself. Each time you’ve completed some daily goal, reward yourself with a token (such as a gold star, a coin, or a poker chip). Then allow yourself to trade your accumulated tokens for rewards related to the goal (35).If you, for example, are a runner, your rewards could look something like this:
• Water bottle — 5 tokens.
• Running socks — 10 tokens.
• Portable music player — 15 tokens.
• Pedometer — 20 tokens.
• Running shoes — 100 tokens.
• Entry to a Marathon — 500 tokens.
Practice self-compassion. Finally, whenever you mess up, know that stacking guilt on top of it won’t make things better. It will only make you feel even worse and make it harder to bounce back (36). So, whenever you’ve had a setback, treat yourself like you would a good friend — with compassion and reassurance
Patrik Edbla

I write about timeless ideas and science-backed strategies to feel great and perform at your very best. Get more from me at http://www.selfication.com/medium/
Better Humans is a collection of the world’s most trustworthy writing on human potential and self improvement by coaches, academics, and aggressive self-experimenters. Articles are based on deep personal experience, science, and research. No fluff, book reports, or listicles.
 Patrik Edblad (author)

rules

12 Rules For Life Summary

1-Sentence-Summary: 12 Rules For Life is a stern, story-based, entertaining self-help manual for young people, that lays out a set of simple principles, which can help us become more disciplined, behave better, act with integrity, and balance our lives while enjoying them as much as we can
 Jordan Peterson’s 12 Rules For…
    Sweep in front of your own door before pointing out the street is dirty.

    Treat yourself like a child you’re responsible for.

    Aim to do what is meaningful, not convenient.

These form the premise Peterson’s book is built on and thus, the context for understanding why it’s been such a success. Let’s go!

Lesson 1: Before you judge the world, take responsibility for your own life.

Life isn’t fair. We all learn that one way or other. Some of us sooner, some later, some in small ways, some from terrifying blows. But we all realize it eventually. Like the Russian writer Leo Tolstoy, who, in his short, philosophical piece, A Confession, concluded there are only four reasonable responses to the absurdity of life:

    Ignorance, like a child refusing to accept reality.

    Pleasure, like an addict on the hedonic treadmill.

    Suicide.

    Holding on, despite everything.

Even though he concluded suicide was the most honest answer, Tolstoy himself chose the last option, forever struggling on, which tells you a lot about his and Peterson’s beliefs about a good life: No matter how unfair life gets, you should never blame the world. There’s always someone who’s suffered worse than you. Like Viktor Frankl, for example.

Besides, even though the future may sometimes look bleak, if you can focus on taking responsibility and keeping your own house clean, so to speak, you’ll find the bad times will pass.

Lesson 2: Care for yourself like you would for a loved one.

Have you ever gotten a prescription from the doctor and thought: “Naaa, I don’t need that?” Over one third of people do it regularly. According to Peterson, it’s neither smart nor smug. It’s a subversive form of self-punishment. We do it a lot and, as a result, tend to take better care of others than ourselves.

Peterson suggests this is a consequence of our inability to deal with the insanity of life described above. Just like Adam and Eve had to taste the forbidden fruit of knowledge, we too indulge in our dark sides from time to time and thus, feel we deserve punishment. But, as with the unfairness of life, we all got thrown out of the Garden of Eden. Like Yin and Yang, we all carry both light and dark inside us. One can’t exist without the other.

That means instead of just striving for either one, we should seek balance, which is why his second rule is to care for yourself like you would care for a loved one: do what is best for you, even though it might not always make you happy.

Lesson 3: Seek meaning through sacrifice, not happiness through pleasure.

Balancing your light and your dark side can take many different forms. Sometimes, it may be staying in bed to get healthy, even though you want to work. Other times, it might mean staying late at work on a Friday. However it looks like, it always involves choosing meaning by making a sacrifice, rather than temporary happiness by choosing pleasure.

Peterson says this is a great coping mechanism, because it helps balance your life between drowning in hedonism and being so righteous it drives you mad. Of course not all sacrifices are equal. Those you make for personal gain, like working overtime to pay for a vacation, hold less meaning than those you make for the greater good, like volunteering on a Saturday.

Even though it might feel like it when you do it, sacrifice is never really about giving up rewards, it’s about deferring them until you can get something even better, usually a feeling of whole-ness or contentment. As such, it’s also great willpower training.

I’ll leave you with an analogy Peterson makes. The Lotus flower starts out at the very bottom of the lake, drenched in darkness. Inch by inch, it grows its way towards the surface, until, eventually, it breaks through and into the sunlight. I could sure think of worse ways to spend a life than to be a Lotus flower.

Written by Niklas Goeke 

networks

We live in an age of networks and networking. But that’s nothing new. From the invention of the printing press in fifteenth-century Europe to the Enlightenment and all the way up to the election of Donald Trump, technology-driven networks have spread radical new ideas, destabilized existing hierarchies and shaped the history of the world.

influence

Influence has been the go-to book for marketers since its release in 1984, which delivers six key principles behind human influence and explains them with countless practical examples.

The book outlines 6 powerful principles, which influence the way we make decisions. Cialdini calls them shortcuts, which, if triggered, make us jump to conclusions faster.

Therefore, our brains like to use them, even when they’re used against us, for example to trick us into buying something.

Here are my favorite 3 of the 6:

You can use the reciprocity bias to build up a massive good karma account.

The scarcity bias works, because we hate to miss opportunities.

Make a small commitment to trigger your consistency bias and reach your goal.

Even though the reciprocity bias is one of the foundational reasons why we’re alive, today it’s often used against us.

We always feel compelled to return a favor, and marketers know this

Go out of your way to help other people and you’ll naturally build up a massive good karma account. No tricks needed.

The fact that you get so angry at yourself for not buying those jeans last week when they were on sale, or got that delicious pizza before they ran out for the day, is the reason why the scarcity bias works.

We beat ourselves up a lot for missing opportunities, regret is a powerful feeling.

The scarcity bias is one of the most widely abused ones, so try to spot it wherever you can

A small commitment sure goes a long way, because it triggers your consistency bias.

Use mini commitments to jumpstart reaching your goals and then let the consistency bias take you the rest of the way.

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live Love

LIVE SMARTER

The Power of Love: 5 Atypical Reads On Relationships

Had enough of narratives that take a narrow view of love? Here are 5 books that might help you to think a little differently about relationships.

by Rosie Allabarton

Love is never simple, but you’d be forgiven if you’d been led to believe otherwise. Whether you’re starting a new relationship, trying to keep a seasoned one alive, or even deciding how to define how and who you love, there are obstacles at every step of the way.

In Helen Fisher’s unique and engrossing book about love, the author takes a look at how the experiences of being in love differ between cultures and in what ways this overwhelming, emotional, and deeply personal event is universal to us all. She discusses the science behind falling in love, and how the neurotransmitters dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin work in combination, increasing and decreasing when we fall for somebody. So, if you really want to know why you’re getting those butterflies in your tummy you’ll find your answer here

Christopher Ryan’s controversial read Sex At Dawn is an argument for the naturally promiscuous nature of men and women. Indeed, Ryan puts forward a compelling case for the downright incompatibility of monogamous relationships with our modern Western culture. Why does Ryan think it’s so unnatural? He cites the huge personal risks people take to commit adultery, how our ancestors would have had multiple partners at a time, and how casual sex between groups strengthens bonds. A fascinating book about sex and our relationship to it.

Jared Diamond discusses the “unusual” sexual behaviors of human beings when compared to other mammals. He explains how monogamy between men and women actually supports the furthering of our DNA, why a woman’s hidden ovulation means humans are happy to have sex at any time (and be less promiscuous) and how human males are more likely to stick around after the birth of a child (in contrast to other species) in doing so securing our position at the top of the food chain. Who said evolution wasn’t sexy

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big

What’s in it for me? Learn about the history and problems of economic concentration.

In recent decades, industrialized nations have witnessed the reemergence of an economic problem that once seemed like a thing of the past – the problem of economic concentration. This refers to the process by which industries become dominated by a smaller and smaller number of companies, which grow bigger and bigger, until just a handful of corporate giants reign supreme.

Today, the most visible giants are those of the tech industry, such as Amazon, Facebook and Google. But those are just the tip of the iceberg. In the United States, for example, more than 75 percent of all industries have seen increasing economic concentration since the year 2000.

In these blinks, we’ll look at how and why this problem first emerged in the late nineteenth century, subsided in the early to mid-twentieth century and then reemerged in the late twentieth century. While taking this whirlwind tour of economic, political and legal history, we’ll also look at the troubling consequences of economic concentration, as well as some possible solutions.

Along the way, you’ll learn

the counterintuitive arguments in favor of monopolies;

the compelling arguments against monopolies; and

the important figures and movements who made those arguments.

The story of economic concentration began in the Gilded Age – the period of American history that ran roughly from the 1870s to 1900. In recounting this story, we will focus primarily on developments in the US, which exemplified the trends that were unfolding in industrialized economies all over the world.

At this time, the overall trend could be described as economic concentration on steroids. During the Gilded Age, the industrialized economies became tremendously concentrated, as one company after another merged into larger and larger corporations. These were called trusts. Between 1895 and 1904, about 2,274 American manufacturing companies consolidated into just 157 trusts.

Many of those trusts became dominant players within their particular industries. Out of the 93 major consolidations of the era, 72 of the resulting trusts captured market shares of more than 40 percent, and 42 of them reached more than 70 percent.  

Beyond those heights, the most dominant of the dominant trusts became monopolists. A monopolist is a company that has gained almost total control over an entire industry – a condition that is called a monopoly. The word “monopolist” can also refer to the leaders of those monopolistic companies.

However, the most successful monopolist of them all was the banker JP Morgan, who achieved monopolies in a range of industries. These included the Northern Securities Company (a railroad trust), the International Mercantile Marine Co. (a shipping trust), AT&T (a telecommunications trust) and US Steel, a steel trust that he formed by fusing together hundreds of steel companies and then buying out his chief rival, the Carnegie Steel Company, in 1901.

Together, Morgan, Carnegie and Rockefeller became the main proponents of the pro-monopoly trust movement

Traditionally, competition has been viewed as one of the cornerstones of capitalism. It forces companies to continuously strive to raise the quality and lower the prices of their products and services. If they succeed in doing so, they can take their rivals’ customers. If they fail, they may lose their market share. Thus, they must innovate to survive and thrive – and everyone benefits as a result. Or at least that’s how the traditional thinking about competition goes – but monopolies run directly counter to that thinking. After all, by definition, monopolies eliminate competition.

But the monopolists of the Gilded Age were unapologetic in their opposition to this idea. Instead, they believed that monopolies were a superior form of economic organization, which would usher in the next stage in the evolution of capitalism. Advocates of this view became collectively known as the trust movement.   

Far from viewing competition favorably, the trust movement’s members blamed it for the economic turmoil that had shaken the industrialized economies of the 1890s. Too much competition had led to prices falling too fast and too low, which had bankrupted hundreds of companies, they claimed.

To them, competition was a form of chaos. It meant distributing the market for a product or service between many small companies. These companies then fought against each other in a never-ending struggle for survival at each other’s expense. The result was constant turbulence.

That’s because larger companies can achieve economies of scale – meaning they can reap the cost-saving benefits of mass production.

These benefits follow from the fact that production costs tend to go down when producing on a large scale. For example, it’s cheaper to build an additional car on an assembly line than in a neighborhood garage. By creating a more efficient, stable and orderly version of capitalism, the trust movement viewed itself as heralding a new dawn for humanity

When companies compete over a market, there are winners and losers. Some companies win greater shares of the market, while others lose their shares and are put out of business or swallowed up in mergers or buyouts. Either way, competition results in fewer competitors commanding larger percentages of the market.

Eventually, this process leads to a single, gargantuan company emerging as the supreme winner and establishing a monopoly. From this perspective, a monopoly can be seen as both the logical conclusion and just reward of capitalist competition. The trust movement argued that by winning out over their competitors, the monopolists had proven themselves to be the most capable, effective and resilient companies in their respective markets.

hands-off approach to the market is called laissez-faire economics. In advocating for this, the trust movement argued against nearly all forms of governmental intrusion into the economy on behalf of the public. Motivated by the social Darwinistic principle of letting the weak perish, the trust movement even fought against child labor bans and working-hour limits.

There was one notable exception to the social Darwinists’ resistance to government intervention. Some of them supported campaigns for government-led eugenics programs, taking the idea of letting the weak and poor perish one step furthe

However, when a company gets too big it starts suffering from diseconomies of scale – its operations become less efficient as it gets bigger.

That’s because the bigger a company gets, the more complex it becomes. It needs more employees, which means more managers and more complicated hierarchies. On top of that, bigger companies are less adaptable to changes in the market. With more moving parts, corporate behemoths are simply less nimble than smaller companies. If becoming an economic giant comes with such disadvantages, why would a company want to become one in the first place? Well, there are also advantages to becoming so big. Unfortunately, they come at the expense of everyone else.

The bigger and stronger a company gets, the more power it has over workers and consumers. After all, it’s hard for workers to reject the working conditions imposed on them if there are no other companies in the industry that they can turn to for employment

big companies create barriers to entry into their markets. If there’s a scarce resource or type of infrastructure that companies must access to compete, the big company can take control of it.

For example, Rockefeller convinced railroads to guarantee him a special discounted rate for shipping his oil. He also made them charge higher rates to his competitors. With the threat of those rates, he forced his competitors to let him buy them out at favorable prices.

He also artificially lowered his prices to the point where no other company could compete. He could do this only because he had enough capital to subsidize the prices. This allowed him to temporarily sell at a loss until his rivals went out of business, at which point he could dramatically increase prices.

In order to carry out their more dubious schemes, the big companies of the Gilded Age needed the government to turn a blind eye – or, even better, lend a helping hand. To that end, they used their economic clout to exert influence over the government.

For example, when pipelines started replacing railroads as the way to transport oil, Rockefeller convinced the government to withhold the permits that would-be competitors needed to build oil pipelines in many areas. And when they did manage to build pipelines, he worked to bankrupt them and then buy them out by using tactics like overpaying for crude oil in certain markets, while artificially lowering its prices in others.

For instance, an oligopoly might lobby the government with aligned interests in mind, rather than continuously striving to put each other out of business. The rewards of doing this can be enormous, as the contemporary US pharmaceutical industry amply demonstrates.

In 2013, the pharmaceutical industry spent $116 million on lobbying Congress to prohibit the federal insurance program Medicare from negotiating lower drug prices when purchasing medicine. That’s a lot of money – but it’s pocket change compared to the payoff, an estimated $90 billion per year in additional revenue

The fewer companies there are, and the more their interests are aligned, the easier it is for them to cooperate.

That helps to explain why oligopolistic and monopolistic companies have so much power compared to ordinary citizens. It’s not just their money and resources; it’s also the basic mathematics of the organization involved. It’s much easier to organize an oligopoly of three like-minded companies than a nation of millions of diverse citizen

Increased economic concentration led to civil unrest starting around the 1880s and extending to the 1900s. Workers went on strike, an Anti-Monopoly Party was formed and the populist Democrat William Jennings Bryan ran for president three times. Meanwhile, over in Europe, there were socialist, communist and anarchist movements afoot, portending the possibility of even greater unrest and revolution if things didn’t change.

Within this context, the first anti-monopoly law – more commonly referred to as an antitrust law – was passed: the Sherman Act of 1890. The law strongly condemned monopolies, declaring the formation of them a felony and banning trusts or any other combination of companies that was “in restraint of trade.”

After McKinley was assassinated in 1901, however, Theodore Roosevelt took office, and things began to change. Roosevelt saw monopolies as a threat to democracy for two reasons. First, they had too much power and influence. They represented a form of private power that rivaled and was on the verge of overwhelming the public power of the state. Second, they were giving rise to an economic situation in which people were miserable and desperate, which might lead them to join their European counterparts in looking for more extreme solutions, like a communist revolution.

Hence, aiming at giants such as JP Morgan’s Northern Securities Company and Rockefeller’s Standard Oil, Roosevelt’s administration filed 45 antitrust lawsuits in total

In 1911, Standard Oil was broken into 34 separate companies, some of which remain some of the most powerful companies in the US today, such as Exxon, Mobil and Chevron

That exception was the Great Depression, particularly around the early 1930s. During that time, Congress suspended antitrust laws, hoping this would help jumpstart the economy.

But after the Great Depression and World War II, the US government returned to its trust-busting ways with renewed fervor. Part of that was because they’d seen what those monopolies could do if left unchecked, as had happened in imperial Japan, fascist Italy and Nazi Germany leading up to and during the war

It was a matter of avoiding the dangers of fascism and communism, and it was pursued with renewed vigor. In 1950, Congress passed the Anti-Merger Act (also known as the Celler-Kefauver Act), enabling the government to prevent, control or even reverse mergers that might lead to monopolies. This way, it could nip monopolies in the bud, rather than waiting for them to grow

Created by JP Morgan, the telecommunications corporation AT&T was the largest company in the world in 1974, and it had been a monopoly for six decades. In fact, by the 1970s, it wasn’t just monopolist – it was a “super monopolist,” controlling six or seven monopolies at once. These were in industries such as local telephone service, long-distance telephone service, physical telephones and telephone accessories.Under President Nixon, the Justice Department initiated antitrust lawsuits against the company in 1974. By the early 1980s, the company was broken up into seven separate regional telephone companies.

Bork was a legal scholar who studied law at the University of Chicago, which became a hotbed of conservative economic, political and legal thought from the 1950s onward. Bork became one of the institution’s main legal thinkers in the 1960s, especially with the publication of his landmark 1966 paper, “Legislative Intent and the Policy of the Sherman Act.”

The paper basically argued for an extremely narrow interpretation of the Sherman Act. Rather than broadly aimed at monopolies and their pernicious effects on a macroeconomic, political and societal level, it claimed that the act was targeted at one thing and one thing alone – consumer welfare. The paper proposed a simple litmus test for whether a monopolistic company ran afoul of the Sherman Act – did it raise consumer prices? If not, there was no reason to break up the company.

Lawyers and judges liked Bork’s interpretation of the Sherman Act because of the simplicity and its apparent scientific rigorousness. They no longer had to deal with politically thorny, philosophically complex issues like the tensions between public and private power. Instead, they could just focus on narrow, quantifiable matters like prices

In the 1990s, the Clinton Administration initiated a major antitrust suit against Microsoft, but it proved to be the last hurrah of the trust movement’s legacy.

Winding through the court system, the suit against Microsoft seemed to be heading toward a big breakup – but before it could get there, George Bush was elected president, and the Justice Department decided to settle the suit.

thus

In the 2000s, the eight parts into which AT&T had been split reformed into two giants, Verizon and AT&T. The latter then bought the cable and satellite television providers DirecTV and TimeWarner, growing even bigger

Airlines were allowed to merge until there were just three major companies, which have worked together to shrink seat sizes, introduce new fees and make record profits.

From 2005 to 2017, the international pharmaceutical market has gone from about 60 companies to ten. In the US, monopoly pricing has allowed companies to raise the prices of drugs by as high as 6,000 percent

Well, the merger of Anheuser-Busch, InBev and SABMiller has resulted in a conglomerate that controls 2,000 brands of beer, including Budweiser, Corona and Stella Artois, accounting for 70 percent of beer sales in the US.  

Meanwhile, if you go online or buy a technology product, you’re confronted with one giant company after another – Google, Amazon, Facebook, eBay, Apple – the list goes on and on. In becoming as big as they are today, many of these companies swallowed up their competitors, while the government just stood by and watched. For example, Facebook bought up WhatsApp and Instagram, while Google acquired YouTube.

Instead of a consumer welfare litmus test, the government can institute a “protection of competition test.” The aim here is to broadly encourage and preserve competitive markets, rather than narrowly focus on prices.

Well, if left unchecked, the private power of concentrated industries may overwhelm the public power of democratic governments. What’s needed, therefore, is a return to the tradition of trust-busting.

Economic concentration arose with the trust movement of the late nineteenth century, receded with the antitrust movement of the early twentieth century and returned with the demise of the antitrust movement’s legacy in the late twentieth century. This is a troubling development because monopolies and oligopolies have pernicious effects on the economy and society at large. The government should, therefore, return to its former tradition of trust-busting in order to safeguard democracy from the dangers of concentrate

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culture code

Summary of

The Culture Code

An Ingenious Way to Understand Why People Around the World Live and Buy as They Do

Clotaire Rapaille

Rating

7Overall

6Applicability

8Innovation

7Style

Recommendation

The core idea of this pleasant, accessible book is easy to grasp: Culturally specific codes shape people’s understandings, behaviors and emotional responses. French-born psychoanalyst and marketing maven Clotaire Rapaille brings a useful perspective shaped by his experiences as a U.S. immigrant to his discussion of what he calls “Culture Codes.” His methods for tapping into these codes are straightforward. However, some of his conclusions lead to fairly sweeping, general claims about overall national cultures. His explanations of coded cultural instincts and actions are still interesting, particularly when he delves specifically into American, French, English, German, Japanese and other societies. getAbstract suggests his book to those interested in cultural differences and those responsible for tailoring marketing concepts to reach specific national audiences around the world.

In this summary, you will learn

What “Culture Codes” are;

How they shape people’s responses, associations and feelings; and

How culture codes vary across nations.

Take-Aways

A “Culture Code” is the unconscious meaning people apply to any given thing – a car, a type of food, even a country – via the culture in which they are raised.

The culture codes that you grew up with determine your actions and emotional responses.

Early imprinting creates this code, which shapes your understanding of the world.

People cite rational reasons for their actions, but their codes explain their real reasons.

Your brain has three parts: rational, emotional and reptilian, the part focused on survival and reproduction. The reptilian brain allows people to gain access to deeper meaning, and to say what they really mean

Often, paired binaries at the opposite ends of a spectrum shape a culture’s codes, i.e., in America freedom is balanced by prohibition. In France, prohibition is balanced by privilege.

Americans unconsciously fixate on adolescence and youthful ideals, with a focus on the “now,” a need to challenge authority, and openness to change and second chances. An older culture like Britain’s sees youth as temporary foolishness.

In America, movement and mobility are highly prized, and food is treated as fuel.

America’s code for work is identity: your job is who you are.

Although a product will have a different “code” in each culture, it is essential that a brand or product maintain a sense of where it comes when it goes out in the world.

Summary

Learning from Your Culture

The “Culture Code” is a combination of imprints shared by an entire culture. The cultural codes that people grow up with shape their responses to all kinds of objects, from cars to toys and ideas, from love to violence. Individuals may not be aware of the “imprint” of their culture, but it powerfully dominates their perceptions, and unconsciously guides their actions, decisions and emotional responses. An individual’s silent cultural code is second only to the genetic code in determining his or her actions and decisions. It governs how people handle essential human behaviors like eating, working and falling in love, and it affects their response to sales messages. When deciphering culture codes, marketers should be aware of five determining factors:

“You can’t believe what people say”– Many marketers ask focus groups what they, as consumers, want. However, such studies can be misleading because people can explain only what they think they want. They can share their rational desires without realizing that when the time comes to make a choice, their cultural coding will shape their decisions. Although marketers shouldn’t entirely disregard what people say, a traditional focus group is not the way to learn what consumers really want. For that, marketers need to reach customers’ unconscious selves, perhaps through dream journals or extended sessions of guided association in which people progressively relax and let their true inner responses emerge.

Emotion drives learning – Real learning requires intense emotion. Because feelings are so much more powerful in very young children, people absorb most of their core cultural patterns by age seven. Emotionally intense experiences that occur at that age or younger continue to have a particularly striking impact.

When people speak, heed “the structure, not the content” – Whether you play a song on a piano or a guitar, the melody is the same. That’s the song’s structure. Thus, when you’re trying to figure out the associations people have with specific products, don’t be distracted if one talks about a Ford and another talks about an Audi. Instead, pay attention to the deeper structure of what a car means to each person.

You have only a limited time to make a lasting impression – The age for imprinting varies according to culture. Generally, children are exposed to only one culture up to age seven, the one in their homes. This is the culture code that will influence them as adults.

Learn the code to understand the meaning – Because the code is a shared element of each culture, you can’t listen to just one person’s story and learn what an object means. You’ll need to gather multiple accounts before you can decipher the code. You are seeking the combination for a lock that opens the “cultural unconscious.”

“The Culture Code is the unconscious meaning we apply to any given thing – a car, a type of food, a relationship, even a country – via the culture in which we are raised.”

Codes for America

Think of a culture as a person. It is born, grows and comes into maturity. Most countries came of age by killing their monarchs. Revolutionary America rejected its king, but didn’t kill him. Its founders rebelled against their parent countries by running away. Launched in such acts of teenage rebellion, the U.S. remains an adolescent culture. This shapes all of America’s codes and explains many of its patterns. Americans focus on the present, not the long term. They have endless energy, and get passionate crushes on celebrities and leaders that surge and pass quickly. They create and innovate easily, and start many new projects, but don’t always follow through or look ahead. These are all adolescent characteristics.

Other countries view America through a range of different associations, many of which fit the adolescent persona. The French look at Hollywood’s indulgence in superficialities plus the U.S.’s grand achievements, like the moon landings, and conclude that Americans are essentially “space travelers.” The Germans remember World War II, and the U.S. armed forces’ brash bravery, but they also think that Americans do things in a slapdash way, so they associate America with the image of the “cowboy.” These traits fit the U.S. code for what its people want in a leader: someone larger than life who has vision, but not conceptual vision. Americans want a “reptilian” visionary, someone who speaks directly to their survival instincts. They want a “Moses,” a leader “who leads the rebellion.”

“For a company breaking into a foreign market or an individual looking for an ideal place to live, the most important thing is to connect with the Code.”

Codes for the Heart: Love and Sex

Americans show their adolescence in their culture codes for love and sex. When young women and young men first mature, their sexuality is dangerous for them. Both genders speak of a battle between the sexes, and the two compete for power. As a result, Americans associate seduction with manipulation and being forced to do things they don’t want to do. The culture code defining sex is even darker: culturally, Americans tend to see sex as violence. They use aggressive language to refer to sex – men speak of “nailing” a woman, and women “joke about castrating a man if he cheats on them” – and people are more comfortable speaking of violence in public than of sex.

Americans also view love immaturely, with high hopes and a contradictory expectation of ultimate failure, so “the American culture code for love is ‘false expectation’.” This is different from the French code, which interweaves “love and pleasure,” or the Italian code, which sees a mother’s love as the truest kind, and views romance mostly as a source of fun and excitement. Japan’s culture offers the greatest contrast, as the Japanese do not expect young people’s desires to lead to marriage. Instead, young folks turn to their parents to make practical choices for them. In Japan, sex is an uncomfortable subject and seduction is a very subtle and oblique process.

“You never get a second chance to have a first experience. Most of us imprint the meanings of the things most central to our lives by the age of seven.”

Body Codes

Your brain has three general sections. The “limbic system,” the area that processes emotion, develops first, from birth to age five. The cortex, which deals with “learning, abstract thought and imagination,” doesn’t develop until after about age seven, but then it becomes the site of logical reasoning. Finally, the “undisputed champion” of your brain is the “reptilian brain,” which consists of “the brain stem and the cerebellum.” This part of your brain cares only about “survival and reproduction,” your most fundamental drives. If the components of your brain ever clash, your reptile brain will win. When codes collide within a society, the winner will be the most powerful elements, the ones that are survival-based.

The reptile brain shapes the U.S. cultural “health and wellness” code. Americans are active and pragmatic. For them, to live is to act and to be occupied. Their health code is “movement,” which explains why senior citizens in the U.S. so strenuously resist the loss of independent mobility, such as refusing to stop driving or continuing to use a walker, even if a wheelchair would be more practical. In American culture, if you stop moving, you might as well be dead. Americans also have negative associations with hospitals, which they see as “processing plants.” By contrast, the U.S. code for nurse is “mother,” and for doctor, it is “hero.” This creates a paradox, as Americans worship doctors but fear hospitals.

“Emotions are the keys to learning [and] imprinting. The stronger the emotion, the more clearly the experience is learned.”

Americans have very strong, specific associations with youth. This is part of being an adolescent culture, but it also stems from the U.S.’s very short history as a new country. Its culture is much younger than European cultures, and its continual flood of immigrants essentially restarts its culture over and over. The result is a country that is convinced it can and should stay young forever. This doesn’t mean just staying vital; it specifically covers looking young. That’s in contrast to England, where the young are seen as callow, or India, where the Hindus believe you grow as you pass through life’s stages. In those countries, trying to hold on to an earlier time of life and look younger would be foolish. However, in America, youth is like a mask, which explains the addiction to plastic surgery, and the popularity of products, like sports cars or hair dyes, that sell youthfulness to middle-aged consumers.

“Even the most self-examining of us are rarely in close contact with our subconscious.”

Contrasts and Tensions

Culture codes are organized according to paired binaries. The French code’s linked comparative qualities are freedom versus privilege. Their belief that free people are too proud to work comes from France’s long history of having a privileged aristocracy made up of people who did not work, an ethos that is no longer acceptable. American culture swings between great freedom, which is built into the nation’s founding documents, and curtailment of freedom, such as prohibition, when alcohol was outlawed. In America, women balance the imperative to be beautiful with the danger of “being too sexy.” This tension results in a complex set of rules that shift according to context. Victoria’s Secret addresses both extremes. Women can be sexy, but in lingerie that they hide under their clothing. Even the store’s name addresses this tension. “Victoria” indicates Victorian stiffness and oppression, while “Secret” hints at the “hidden closet,” the illicit expression of sexuality.

“The Internet cannot provide the kind of shopping experience Americans want. It doesn’t allow us to get out into the world and reconnect with life.”

The emphasis America puts on female beauty positions it as “man’s salvation.” Americans believe a beautiful woman can make a man into a better person. The movie Pretty Woman sums up these codes succinctly. Julia Roberts is essentially disposable as a prostitute, but when she turns into an elegant, well-dressed lady, she is able to transform Richard Gere’s character in turn, making him more ethical and compassionate. Some Americans override this complex dichotomy by gaining weight. According to their cultural code, people who are connected to society are fit and active. However, when they disconnect, they get fat, so gaining weight signals that a person is “checking out.” For instance, Al Gore gained weight after losing the 2000 presidential election and dropped the weight when he was ready to once again play a public role.

Given the negative association fat has in the U.S., you might wonder why America invented fast food and the “all-you-can-eat buffet.” The reasons lie in the deep emotional link to food. Just as health means motion, food means fuel. Americans value the sensation of being full as much as the French value the flavor of their food. As a culture, America also remembers its “humble beginnings,” when the settlers had to struggle to survive, and it is still gorging to make up for it. Finally, “on the limbic level,” Americans associate food with trusted maternal love, because mothers feed their children. Americans feel that to be fed is to be loved – and to be fed quickly, as in a fast food restaurant, is to be loved and to be made ready to move again.

“When the French spoke of Americans, it was almost as though they were speaking about an alien race.”

Codes for Work, Shopping and Quality

In the 1980s, the U.S. tried to “adopt the Japanese approach to quality” for rational reasons. Japan’s economy was booming while many U.S. companies faced serious challenges. This attempt failed largely due to the disparities between the two cultures’ codes for quality. Americans associate quality with function – the code for quality is “It Works” – while the Japanese associate it with perfection. Rather than creating a perfect product, Americans produce something that is good enough. When it is good enough, they move on. When it fails, they improve it. That’s why Hyundai succeeded in the U.S. when it introduced new warranties and service plans for its cars; it acknowledged the cars’ imperfections but promised to keep them going.

Given the value Americans ascribe to getting things done, it makes sense that their “culture code for work is ‘who you are’.” Your job defines you. This is taken for granted in America, but perhaps not in other countries. In France, only positions in the aristocracy, military and clergy traditionally held intrinsic value; other jobs were essentially free of meaning. Work was linked to peasantry. In India, people mature past their working years and enter a final stage of spiritual development.

“At the unconscious level, Americans believe that good people succeed, that success is bestowed on you by God. Your success demonstrates that God loves you.”

In America, the meaning of shopping is similar to the meaning of work plus the idea of movement, so shopping is “reconnecting with life.” This comes from several sources, such as the frontier experience, when settlers were cut off from civilization and couldn’t shop. Purchasing luxury items demonstrates that you’ve arrived; they are verification that you really are the person you have tried to create through your work.

About the Author

Psychoanalyst and marketer Clotaire Rapaille is the founder and chairman of Archetype Discoveries Worldwide

https://www.getabstract.com/en/summary/the-culture-code/6236?utm_source=email&utm_medium=newsletter&utm_campaign=B2C_EN_E-Blast&utm_content=CultureCode_022019&utm_source=getAbstract&utm_medium=email&esid=443896267&l=1

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decision

decide do delegate delete :Eisenhower’s strategy for taking action and organizing your tasks is simple. Using the decision matrix below, you will separate your actions based on four possibilities.

Urgent and important (tasks you will do immediately).

Important, but not urgent (tasks you will schedule to do later).

Urgent, but not important (tasks you will delegate to someone else).

Neither urgent nor important (tasks that you will eliminate).

The great thing about this matrix is that it can be used for broad productivity plans (“How should I spend my time each week?”) and for smaller, daily plans (“What should I do today?”).

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habbits

habits are what you choose them to be

Change might not be fast and it isn’t always easy. But with time and effort, almost any habit can be reshaped.

The Golden Rule of Habit Change: You can’t extinguish a bad habit, you can only change it

If you believe you can change – if you make it a habit – the change becomes real.

to change a habit, you must keep the old cue, and deliver the old reward, but insert a new routine

THE FRAMEWORK: • Identify the routine • Experiment with rewards • Isolate the cue • Have a plan

This process within our brains is a three-step loop. First, there is a cue, a trigger that tells your brain to go into automatic mode and which habit to use. Then there is the routine, which can be physical or mental or emotional. Finally, there is a reward, which helps your brain figure out if this particular loop is worth remembering for the future: THE HABIT LOOP

Charles Duhigg, The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business

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Agree…

    The Four Agreements

    1. Be impeccable with your word.

    2. Don’t take anything personally.

    3. Don’t make assumptions.

    4. Always do your best.
don Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom

what to do !

    1. Be Impeccable With Your Word

    Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
    2. Don’t Take Anything Personally

    Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.
    3. Don’t Make Assumptions

    Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
    4. Always Do Your Best

    Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.
Don Miguel Ruiz

HBR. on Trust…

The Three Elements of Trust

By understanding the behaviors that underlie trust, leaders are better able to elevate the level of trust that others feel toward them. Here are the three elements.

Positive Relationships. Trust is in part based on the extent to which a leader is able to create positive relationships with other people and groups. To instill trust a leader must:

Stay in touch on the issues and concerns of others.

Balance results with concern for others.

Generate cooperation between others.

Resolve conflict with others.

Give honest feedback in a helpful way.

Good Judgement/Expertise. Another factor in whether people trust a leader is the extent to which a leader is well-informed and knowledgeable. They must understand the technical aspects of the work as well as have a depth of experience. This means:

They use good judgement when making decisions.

Others trust their ideas and opinions.

Others seek after their opinions.

Their knowledge and expertise make an important contribution to achieving results.

Can anticipate and respond quickly to problems.

Consistency. The final element of trust is the extent to which leaders walk their talk and do what they say they will do. People rate a leader high in trust if they:

Are a role model and set a good example.

Walk the talk.

Honor commitments and keep promises.

Follow through on commitments.

Are willing to go above and beyond what needs to be done.

We wanted to understand how these three elements interacted to create the likelihood that people would trust a leader. We created three indices for each element and since we had such a large dataset, we experimented with how performance on each of the dimensions impacted the overall trust score. In our study we found that if a leader scored at or above the 60th percentile on all three factors, their overall trust score was at the 80th percentile.

We compared high scores (above 60th percentile) and low scores (below the 40th percentile) to examine the impact these had on the three elements that enabled trust. Note that these levels are not extremely high or low. Basically, they are 10 percentile points above and below the norm. This is important because it means that being just above average on these skills can have a profound positive effect and, conversely, just being below average can destroy trust.

We also found that level of trust is highly correlated with how people rate a leader’s overall leadership effectiveness. It has the strongest impact on the direct reports’ and peer overall ratings. The manager’s ratings and the engagement ratings were not as highly correlated, but all the differences are statistically significant.

Do You Need All Three Elements of Trust?

We were also curious to know if leaders needed to be skilled in all three elements to generate a high level of trust and whether any one element had the most significant impact on the trust rating. To gauge this, we created an experiment where we separated leaders into high and low levels on each of the three pillars and then measured the level of trust.

Intuitively we thought that consistency would be the most important element. Saying one thing and doing another seems like it would hurt trust the most. While our analysis showed that inconsistency does have a negative impact (trust went down 17 points), it was relationships that had the most substantial impact. When relationships were low and both judgment and consistency were high, trust went down 33 points. This may be because many leaders are seen as occasionally inconsistent. We all intend to do things that don’t get done, but once a relationship is damaged or if it was never formed in the first place, it’s difficult for people to trust.

We often tell people that they don’t need to be perfect to be an excellent leader but when it comes to trust, all three of these elements need to be above average. Remember that, in our analysis, we set the bar fairly low: at the 60th percentile. This is not a brilliant level of performance, barely above average.

We have regularly found in our research that if a leader has a preference for a particular skill, they are more likely to perform better at it. Think about which of these elements of trust you have a stronger preference for – and which you prefer least. Because you need to be above average on each, it is probably worth your time to focus on improving the latter.

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stress – work less focus on hobby more- hbr

Why You Should Work Less and Spend More Time on Hobbies

Gaetano DiNardi

February 07, 2019

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Tara Moore/Getty Images

As professionals around the world feel increasingly pressed for time, they’re giving up on things that matter to them. A recent HBR article noted that in surveys, most people “could name several activities, such as pursuing a hobby, that they’d like to have time for.”

This is more significant than it may sound, because it isn’t just individuals who are missing out. When people don’t have time for hobbies, businesses pay a price. Hobbies can make workers substantially better at their jobs. I know this from personal experience. I’ve always loved playing the guitar and composing. But just like workers everywhere, I can fall into the trap of feeling that I have no time to engage in it. As head of demand generation for Nextiva, I have enough on my plate to keep me busy around the clock. I can easily fall into the trap of the “72-hour workweek,” which takes into account time people spend connected to work on our phones outside of official work hours.

When I crash, there’s always the temptation to do something sedentary and mindless. It’s little surprise that watching TV is by far the most popular use of leisure time in the U.S. and tops the list elsewhere as well, including Germany and England.

But by spending time on music, I boost some of my most important workplace skills.

Creativity. To stand out and compete in today’s crowded and constantly changing business environment, organizations need new, innovative ideas that will rise above the noise. I’m tasked with constantly looking for new ways to attract attention from potential buyers. But coming up with a fully original idea can be difficult when your mind is filled with targets, metrics, and deadlines.

A creative hobby pulls you out of all that. Whether you’re a musician, artist, writer, or cook, you often start with a blank canvas in your mind. You simply think: What will I create that will evoke the emotion I’m going for?

It’s no surprise that by giving yourself this mental space, and focusing on feelings, you can reawaken your creativity. Neuroscientists have found that rational thought and emotions involve different parts of the brain. For the floodgates of creativity to open, both must be in play.

Perspective. One of the trickiest tasks in the creative process is thinking through how someone else would experience your idea. But in doing creative hobbies, people think that way all the time. A potter imagines how the recipient of a vase would respond to it. A mystery novelist considers whether an unsuspecting reader will be surprised by a plot twist.

When I take a break from work to go make music, I reconnect with that perspective. I keep thinking about how someone hearing my song for the first time might respond. I do all I can to see (or hear) the world through someone else’s eyes (or ears). Then, when I resume the work project, I take that mentality with me.

Confidence. When I face a tough challenge at work and feel stymied, I can start to question whether I’ll ever figure out a successful solution. It’s easy to lose creative confidence. But after an hour of shredding on the guitar, hitting notes perfectly, I’m feeling good. I can tell that my brain was craving that kind of satisfaction. And when I face that work project again, I bring the confidence with me.

It turns out people like me have been studied. In one study, researchers found that “creative activity was positively associated with recovery experiences (i.e., mastery, control, and relaxation) and performance‐related outcomes (i.e., job creativity and extra‐role behaviors).” In fact, they wrote, “Creative activity while away from work may be a leisure activity that provides employees essential resources to perform at a high level.”

So to my fellow professionals, I highly recommend taking some time to keep up your creative hobby. It doesn’t have to be long. A study found that spending 45 minutes making art helps boost someone’s confidence and ability to complete tasks.

I also suggest you encourage your business to celebrate employees’ hobbies. Zappos puts employee artwork up on its walls and encourages people to decorate their desks in whatever ways they wish. Some businesses hold talent shows. Even employees who may not have these kinds of talents should be encouraged to do something that feels creative and fun. Some CEOs spend time on their own hobbies, setting the right example.

And when you find a little time for a creative hobby break, make it guilt free. After all, when you do this, everyone stands to gain.

Gaetano DiNardi is the Director of Demand Generation at Nextiva.

elephants teach us to

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10 Lessons Of Love We Can Learn From Elephants

We take a look at what elephants can teach us about relationships.

by Lucy Moore | 22 September 2017

Today is World Elephant Appreciation Day, so we take a look at the lessons we can learn about relationships from the complex sets of social skills in elephants.

They grieve for their loved ones

Show your emotions- Elephants show humour, co-operation, self-awareness and playfulness. There is nothing wrong with being emotionally honest with your partner- in fact it brings you closer together as you can be vulnerable together.

People don’t say ‘laughing is the best medicine’ for nothing- it really is the best tonic for any relationship.

Being aware of your own needs and desires is important to communicate to your partner- you may be a couple; however you still bring individual traits to the relationship.

Every couple needs to be playful at times, to alleviate stress and to momentarily forget about their responsibilities. ‘All work and no play’– as the saying goes.

Finally, co-operation is essential for a peaceful relationship- to show mutual support for one another to reach the same goal.

Joy- Elephants have no shame in showing when they are happy with their loved ones and greet those most precious to them with expressions of joy. If you are enjoying your time with your partner- tell them- better yet- show them that you value the moments you spend together and that you are happy to be with them. If we are not careful, we can fixate on all the things that go wrong rather than appreciating the small moments of joy in between. It is important to acknowledge them to reinforce why you’re together.

The power of touch- Elephants frequently touch and caress one another and make contact by entwining their trunks. Touch is a very powerful force in a relationship. It shows your partner that you want to be physically close to them, communicates protection and safety and that you still find them desirable.

Reassurance- Elephants reassure one another in times of uncertainty and fear. It is important that in a couple- you reassure each other even if you secretly have doubts over the future as it gets you through the tougher times.

Team work- Elephants demonstrate team work with each other all the time. Team work is essential in any relationship. Whether it’s pulling together to arrange an event, to decorate your shared living quarters or to simply cook a meal- it’s very important that lovers work effectively as a pair to be successful.

Curiosity- Elephants are naturally curious creatures. Curiosity that drives you to start rifling through your partner’s stuff may be taking things too far; however a mild curiosity makes you learn things about your partner that you might not have ordinarily discovered.

Creativity- Elephants are imaginative animals- and have been captured working with humans to generate something creative on many an occasion. Even for couples who don’t consider themselves creative in their hobbies and interests; a certain amount of creativity is key to the success of relationship. Couples have to come up with new ideas all the time to keep their relationship fresh and interesting. Creativity can be simply thinking of something to do on a free Saturday or on an evening when you are both looking to be entertained.

Compassion- Studies have found that elephants make allowances for those closest to them. Showing your partner compassion demonstrates an ability to see life from their point of view. If your partner is sick- understanding that they might not be able to function at their normal pace means a great deal to them.

Altruism- There have been countless stories of elephants caring for other injured species. We can all take a leaf from their book. Not only should you care for your partner but their family and friends too. If their loved ones are hurt or upset, you should care for them with the same gusto as you would your partner. They are your extended family after all.

Grief- Elephants are renowned for mourning their loved ones. It is important if your partner suffers a loss in their family, that you are there for them- for as long as it takes. Grieving shows that you feel their sense of loss and that you also developed an attachment to their loved one in the time you knew them.

by Lucy Moore for relationships.femalefirst.co.uk

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Why should we be dependent on another’s opinion of us?

*வாழ்க்கை*

Live well

தனது குடும்பம் என்ற ஒரு பத்து பேர், தனது நண்பனும் பகைவனும் என்ற பத்து பேர், தனது தொழிலில் ஒரு பத்து பேர், தனது வீதியில் ஒரு பத்து பேர், தனது ஜாதியில் ஒரு அறுபது பேர்..!!
இந்த நூறு பேரின் நடுவில் தன்னை உயர்த்திக் காட்டிக் கொள்வதும், பாசமாக, நட்பாக, அன்பாக, வீரனாக, நல்லவனாக  காட்டிக் கொள்வதுமே மனித வாழ்வின் குறிக்கோள் என்று இந்த கேடுகெட்ட சமுதாயம் மனிதர்களுக்கு போதிக்கிறது.
எல்லாவற்றையும் அவர்களோடு ஒப்பிட்டு பார்த்து  அதைவிட ஒரு படியேனும் அதிகமாக இருக்க வேண்டும் அப்போதுதான் மதிப்பு என்று போலியான வாழ்க்கை வாழ கட்டாயப்படுத்துகிறது.
அவன் அப்படி, இவன் இப்படி என்று பிறரை விமர்சனம் செய்யச் சொல்கிறது. பொருளாதார ரீதியாக தன்னிறைவு அடைந்ததும் பிறரை ஏளனமாக, கேவலமாக நினைக்கச் சொல்கிறது.
இந்த நூறு பேரின் நடுவில் ஏற்படும் அவமானமும், கோபமும், கௌரவமும் மட்டுமே ஒருவனை பாதிக்கின்றன. இதற்காக தன்னுடைய அத்தனை ஆசாபாசங்களையும் அடக்கி வைத்து, மனித ஜடமாக  வாழும் பலருக்கு இந்த பூமிப் பந்து எழுநூறு கோடி மக்களால் ஆனது என்பது தெரிவதில்லை.
என்னுடைய தாத்தாவின் தாத்தா எப்படி இருந்தார் என்பது எனக்குத் தெரியாது! 
எப்படி வாழ்ந்தார் என்பது எனக்குத் தெரியாது!! 
அவர் நல்லவரா கெட்டவரா எனக்குத் தெரியாது!!
அவர் பெயர் கூட எங்கள் தெருவில் பலருக்குத் தெரியாது, எங்கள் ஊரில் யாருக்கும் தெரியாது!! 
இதே நிலை எனக்கும் ஒரு நாள் வரும்!
நான் இந்த பூமியில் வாழ்ந்ததற்கான அடையாளம் அத்தனையும் கால ஓட்டத்தில் மறையும்!!
ஆக எதற்காக இந்த நூறு பேரின் அங்கீகாரக்தை நான் கண்டுகொள்ள வேண்டும்????
யார் இவர்கள்????
என்னுடைய வாழ்க்கையில் யாரெல்லாம் வர வேண்டும், வரக்கூடாது என்பதை தீர்மானிக்க இவர்கள் யார்????
நான் இன்னும் ஆயிரம் ஆண்டுகளுக்கு வாழப் போவதில்லை!
அதிகபட்சம் இன்னும் சில ஆண்டுகள்!
அதுவும் வெகு தொலைவில் இல்லை!
சர்வமும் ஒருநாள் அழியும்!
மனித வாழ்க்கை அற்புதமானது. அழகானது!
கலாச்சாரம், பண்பாடு, பாரம்பரியம் என்று தத்தமது வாழ்க்கையை யாரும் போலியாக வீணடித்து விடாதீர்கள்.
வாழ்க்கை ஒரே ஒரு முறைதான்!
தோற்றால் பரவாயில்லை, ஆனால் பங்கெடுக்காமலேயே அழிந்து விடாதீர்கள்.
நம் தாத்தாவின் தாத்தாவை நாம் பார்த்ததில்லை. அதேபோல் நம் பேரனின் பேரனை நாம் பார்க்க இருக்கப்போவதில்லை. இது தான் வாழ்க்கை.
*”பிறரை வஞ்சிக்காமல் தொந்தரவு செய்யாமல் எவ்வளவு இயலுமோ அவ்வளவு மகிழ்ச்சியாய் வாழ்ந்துவிட்டு செல்லுங்கள்”*
200 பேர்கள் கூடியிருந்த அரங்கத்தில் ஒரு பேச்சாளார் ஒரு 500 ரூபாய் நோட்டைக் காட்டி

” யாருக்கு இது’ பிடிக்கும்?” எனக் கேட்டார்.

கூடியிருந்த அனைவரும் தனக்கு பிடிக்குமென கையை தூக்கினர்.

பேச்சாளார் “உங்களில் ஒருவருக்கு இந்த 500 ரூபாயைத் தருகிறேன் ஆனால் அதற்கு முன்” என சொல்லி

அந்த 500 ரூபாயைக் கசக்கி சுருட்டினார். பிறகு அதை சரி செய்து

“இப்போதும் இதன் மீது உங்களுக்கு இன்னும் விருப்பம் இருக்கிறதா?” என்றார்.

அனைவரும் கையைத் தூக்கினர்.

அவர் அந்த ரூபாய் நோட்டை தரையில் போட்டு காலால் நசுக்கி அந்த அழுக்கான நோட்டை காட்டி

“இன்னும் இதன் மேல் உங்களுக்கு விருப்பம் இருக்கிறதா? என்றார்.

அனைவரும் இப்போதும் கைகளை தூக்கினர்.

அவர் தொடர்ந்தார் “கேவலம் ஒரு 500 ரூபாய்தாள் பல முறை கசங்கியும் மிதிபட்டும் அழுக்கடைந்தும்

அதன் மதிப்பை இழக்கவில்லை.

ஆனால் மனிதர்களாகிய நாம் அவமானப் படும் போதும் ,தோல்விகளை சந்திக்கும் போதும் மனமுடைந்து போய் நம்மை நாமே தாழ்த்தி கொள்கிறோம் .

நம்முடைய மதிப்பு என்றைக்கும் குறைவதில்லை. நீங்கள் தனித்துவமானவர்.

இவ்வுலகில் உள்ள ஒவ்வொருவருக்கும் ஒவ்வொரு தனித் தன்மை இருக்கும்.

அதன் மதிப்பு என்றைக்கும் குறைவதில்லை. வாழ்கை என்ற பயிர்க்கு

தைரியமும் தன்னம்பிக்கையும் தான் உரம்.

ஆகையால் தன்னம்பிக்கையை இழக்காமல் வாழுங்கள் 

……

*அழகான வரிகள் பத்து*. 

1, அறிமுகம் இல்லாதவர்களின் பார்வையில்.. நாம் எல்லோரும் *சாதாரண மனிதர்கள்* 2,பொறாமைக்காரரின் பார்வையில்.. நாம் அனைவரும் *அகந்தையாளர்கள்* 3. நம்மைப் புரிந்து கொண்டோரின் பார்வையில்.. நாம் *அற்புதமானவர்கள்* 4,நேசிப்போரின் பார்வையில்.. நாம் *தனிச் சிறப்பானவர்கள்* 5,காழ்ப்புனர்ச்சி கொண்டவர்களின் பார்வையில்.. நாம் *கெட்டவர்கள்* 

7. சுயநலவாதிகளின் பார்வையில் நாம்… *ஒழிக்கப்பட வேண்டியவர்கள்*

 8. சந்தர்ப்பவாதிகளின் பார்வையில் நாம் *ஏமாளிகள்* 

9. எதையும் புரிந்து கொள்ளாதவர்கள் பார்வையில் நாம் *குழப்பவாதிகள்* 

10. கோழைகளின் பார்வையில் நாம் *அவசரக்குடுக்கைகள்* நம்மை பற்றி ஒவ்வொருவருக்கும் ஒரு தனியான பார்வை உண்டு. ஆதலால் – பிறரிடம் உங்கள் பிம்பத்தை அழகாக்கிக் காட்ட *சிரமப்படாதீர்கள்* மற்றவர்கள் உங்களை புரிந்துகொள்ளாவிட்டாலும்…… *நீங்கள் நீங்களாகவே இருங்கள்* மனிதர்களை திருப்திப்படுத்துதல் என்பது எட்ட முடியாத இலக்கு… இந்த மனிதர்களிடம் *எட்ட முடியாததை விட்டு விடுங்கள்!* *அடைய வேண்டியதை விட்டு விடாதீர்கள்…!* எப்போதும் நேர்மையும் தைரியமும் உங்கள் சொத்தாக இருக்கட்டும. *படித்ததில் பிடித்தது பகிர்கிறேன்*  ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,       

Fun filledManagement thoughts forwarded from whstsapp

Two Minutes Management tip
Lesson One.
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing?”
The eagle answered: “Sure, why not.”
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit, and ate it.
Management Lesson – To be sitting doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Two.
A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the energy.”
“Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.”
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
Management Lesson – Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.
Lesson Three.
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold; the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.
While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realise how warm he was.
The dung was actually thawing him out!
He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lessons – (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy. (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend. (3) And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut!
This ends your Two (2)-Minutes Management Course.

Ideal team player

Teamwork
Hi Anilkumar,
When it comes to hiring the right people, probably no manager can claim to have a perfect record. Mistakes happen all the time. But you can substantially increase your odds of success by looking beyond a candidate’s resume.
According to author Patrick Lencioni, a candidate’s skills, experience and accomplishments tell just part of the story. Equally important is whether he is “humble, hungry” and “people smart.”
In his popular 2016 book, The Ideal Team Player , Lencioni explains why an individual’s ability to function in a collaborative setting is as important as anything on his resume.
“Too often, leaders know that an employee really doesn’t belong and would be better elsewhere, and they fail to act because they lack courage,” Lencioni writes. “Many leaders who value teamwork … reluctantly hire self-centered people and then justify it simply because those people have desired skills.”

Nifty

After a long wait, Nifty50 hit the 10,000 mark on a closing basis today viz  on Wednesday 26Julb2017;for the first time. This came a day ahead of the expiry of July futures and options contracts. The index witnessed a breakout above its three-month old ascending channel on the daily chart. 

SERVICE

Serve , even if it hurts.

One of the great ironies of life is tha, t one who serves , almost always benefits more than , he or she who is served another.

What you give out to the world is miniscule portion compared to what the universe bestows you with

So the best and easy way to cheer yourself up is just to try to cheer somebody else up, as often as possible

Therefore be somebody who makes everybody feel like a somebody, ( not nobody)

You will get more than what you give, (whatever it may be) so choose wisely and serve abundantly

PERSISTENCE

People can do not just whatever they want but each and everything they they could desire and dream of, if only they just set their heart to it, and just never give up, and just go out there and do it, with determination dedication and deadly devlish devotion in focusing their energies and channeling their strengths and talents towards their ambitious goal…

Optimism

Optimism is a magnet that bring joy and peace to you.  If you look at life in a positive fashion, good things and good people and good experiences are bound tobe drawn to you.

You will be blind to undesirable events as the good outweighs the do called bad incidents

Keeping busy by posively thinking of wonderful possobiliries and making optimism a way of life can restore your faith in yourself as you appreciate and embrace good things and learn to neglect or ignore no do happy situations

Goodday

Comfort vs courage

Integrity is choosing courage over comfort; choosing what is right over what is fun, fast, or easy; and choosing to practice our values rather than simply professing them.

Brené Brown

Change

In Leading Change, James O’Toole explains that people resist change primarily because they bristle at the idea of having the will of others imposed upon them. They then concoct moral justifi cations to defend their positions.

Psychologist Jonathan Haidt has noted, the mind looks for ways to make sense of what the gut has already decided

10 May, 2017 21:57

“If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” -Albert Einstein

I read a lot of Dr. Seuss and Shel Silverstein to my son these days. Often times, I leave these books speaking in rhyme or moved to write a child-like poem. I have learned that some messages are actually better communicated through this type of poetry. The above quote inspired the following poem, which speaks to the negative impact unrealistic expectations can have. Too often, the expectations people possess and experience cause unnecessary psychological harm.

“Fish Can’t Climb”

A fish can’t climb, a bee can’t swim,
So why might you assume they’re dim?
Snakes can’t walk or clap their hands,
No matter what their parents demand.

A hippo or elephant may look in the mirror,
Hoping they’ll see a little bit clearer,
Shedding tears over chubby reflections,
Because the skinny ones meet them with pure rejection

Getting Things Done

If you judge people, you have no time to love them. I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love. – Mother Teresa
Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance. – Oscar Wilde
Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. – Robert Frost
We live in this world when we love it. – Rabindranath Tagore
You don’t have to deserve your mother’s love. You have to deserve your father’s. – Robert Lee Frost

getting things done by allen – summary extract by anil 05May2017 .pdf

25 April, 2017 10:08

Every day, a small Ant arrived at work early and starting work immediately, she produced a lot and she was happy. The boss, a lion, was surprised to see that the ant was working without supervision. He thought if the ant can produce so much without supervision, wouldn’t she produce more if she had a supervisor!

So the lion recruited a cockroach who had extensive experience as a supervisor and who was famous for writing excellent reports. The cockroach’s first decision was to set up a clocking in attendance system. He also needed a secretary to help him write and type his reports. He recruited a spider who managed the archives and monitored all phone calls.

The Lion was delighted with the cockroach’s report and asked him to produce graphs to describe production rates and analyze trends so that he could use them for presentations at board meetings. So the cockroach had to buy a new computer and a laser printer and recruit a fly to manage the IT department. The Ant , who had been once so productive and relaxed, hated this new plethora of paperwork and meetings which used up most of her time.

The lion came to the conclusion that it was high time to nominate a person in charge of the department where the ant worked. The position was given to the Cicada whose first decision was to buy a carpet and an ergonomic chair for his office.The new person in charge, the cicada, also needed a computer and a personal assistant, whom he had brought from his previous department to help him prepare a work and budget control strategic optimization plan.

The department where the ant works is now a sad place, where nobody laughs anymore and everybody has become upset. It was at that time the cicada convinced the boss, the Lion, to start a climatic study of the office environment. Having reviewed the charges of running the ant’s department, the lion found out that the production was much less than before so he recruited the Owl, a prestigious and renowned consultant to carry out an audit and suggest solutions. The Owl spent 3 months in the department and came out with an enormous report, in several volumes, that concluded that ” The Department is overstaffed..”

Guess who the lion fired first ?

The Ant of course “Because she showed lack of motivation and had a negative attitude.”

If we transpose this fable to the world of work, one is tempted to offer this fable as a good illustration of why it’s necessary to promote and implement empowerment in every organization and how the role of a manager should be to empower the team member to that he/she can do the job effectively and not be burdened by excessive layers of red tape and administrative tasks which only serve to justify and prove that actions are being taken rather than that results have been achieved.

Indeed, as we all know, the amount of reporting and administrative tasks required by an organization is inversely proportional to the effectiveness of the organization in question.

Thia the fact in the game of life…..

Sent from Yahoo Mail on Android

Love – Life

“Anyone who falls in love is searching for the missing pieces of themselves. So anyone who’s in love gets sad
when they think of their lover. It’s like stepping back inside a room you have fond memories of, one you
haven’t seen in a long time.”

― Haruki Murakami

“Two people can sleep in the same bed and still be alone when they close their eyes” – Haruki Murakami, Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World

“Everyone may be ordinary, but they’re not normal.” – Haruki Murakami, Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World

“If you can love someone with your whole heart, even one person, then there’s salvation in life. Even if you can’t get together with that person1.” – Haruki Murakami, 1Q84

“I can bear any pain as long as it has meaning.” – Haruki Murakami, 1Q84

“That’s what the world is , after all: an endless battle of contrasting memories.” – Haruki Murakami, 1Q84

“You can hide memories, but you can’t erase the history that produced them.” – Haruki Murakami,2 Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage

“One heart is not connected to another through harmony alone. They are, instead, linked deeply through their wounds. Pain linked to pain, fragility to fragility. There is no silence without a cry of grief, no forgiveness without bloodshed, no acceptance without a passage through acute loss. That is what lies at the root of true harmony.” – Haruki Murakami, Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage

“As we go through life we gradually discover who we are, but the more we discover, the more we lose ourselves.” – Haruki Murakami, Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage

“Memories warm you up from the inside. But they also tear you apart.” – Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore

And once the storm is over you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.” – Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore

“Lost opportunities, lost possibilities, feelings we can never get back. That’s part of what it means to be alive. But inside our heads – at least that’s where I imagine it – there’s a little room where we store those memories. A room like the stacks in this library. And to understand the workings of our own heart we have to keep on making new reference cards. We have to dust things off every once in awhile, let in fresh air, change the water in the flower vases. In other words, you’ll live forever in your own private library.” – Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore

“Listen up – there’s no war that will end all wars.” – Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore

“Silence, I discover, is something you can actually hear.” – Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore

“There’s no such thing as perfect writing, just like there’s no such thing as perfect despair.” – Haruki Murakami, Hear the Wind Sing

“For example, the wind has its reasons. We just don’t notice as we go about our lives. But then, at some point, we are made to notice. The wind envelops you with a certain purpose in mind, and it rocks you. The wind knows everything that’s inside you. And not just the wind. Everything, including a stone. They all know us very well. From top to bottom. It only occurs to us at certain times. And all we can do is go with those things. As we take them in, we survive, and deepen.” – Haruki Murakami, Hear the Wind Sing

“Whenever I look at the ocean, I always want to talk to people, but when I’m talking to people, I always want to look at the ocean.” – Haruki Murakami, Hear the Wind Sing

“On any given day, something claims our attention. Anything at all, inconsequential things. A rosebud, a misplaced hat, that sweater we liked as a child, an old Gene Pitney record. A parade of trivia with no place to go. Things that bump around in our consciousness for two or three days then go back to wherever they came from… to darkness. We’ve got all these wells dug in our hearts. While above the wells, birds flit back and forth.” – Haruki Murakami, Pinball, 1973

“Me, I’ve seen 45 years, and I’ve only figured out one thing. That’s this: if a person would just make the effort, there’s something to be learned from everything. From even the most ordinary, commonplace things, there’s always something you can learn. I read somewhere that they said there’s even different philosophies in razors. Fact is, if it weren’t for that, nobody’d survive.” – Haruki Murakami, Pinball, 1973

“Sometimes I feel like a caretaker of a museum — a huge, empty museum where no one ever comes, and I’m watching over it for no one but myself.”- Haruki Murakami, Pinball, 1973

“If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking.” – Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood
“What happens when people open their hearts?” “They get better.” – Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood

“Nobody likes being alone that much. I don’t go out of my way to make friends, that’s all. It just leads to disappointment. ” – Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood

“Unfortunately, the clock is ticking, the hours are going by. The past increases, the future recedes. Possibilities decreasing, regrets mounting.” – Haruki Murakami, Dance Dance Dance

“As time goes on, you’ll understand. What lasts, lasts; what doesn’t, doesn’t. Time solves most things. And what time can’t solve, you have to solve yourself.” – Haruki Murakami, Dance Dance Dance

“What we seek is some kind of compensation for what we put up with.” – Haruki Murakami, Dance Dance Dance

“Every one of us is losing something precious to us. Lost opportunities, lost possibilities, feelings we can never get back again. That’s part of what it means to be alive.” – Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore

“If you remember me, then I don’t care if everyone else forgets.” – Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore
“Whiskey, like a beautiful woman, demands appreciation. You gaze first, then it’s time to drink.” – Haruki Murakami, Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World

“Music brings a warm glow to my vision, thawing mind and muscle from their endless wintering.” – Haruki Murakami, Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World

“Most everything you think you know about me is nothing more than memories.” – Haruki Murakami, A Wild Sheep Chase

“Sometimes I get real lonely sleeping with you.” – Haruki Murakami, A Wild Sheep Chase

“The light of morning decomposes everything.” – Haruki Murakami, A Wild Sheep Chase

We can invest enormous time and energy in serious efforts to know another person, but in the end, how close can we come to that person’s essence? We convince ourselves that we know the other person well, but do we really know anything important about anyone?” – Haruki Murakami, The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle

“Memories and thoughts age, just as people do. But certain thoughts can never age, and certain memories can never fade.” – Haruki Murakami, The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle

“Spend your money on the things money can buy. Spend your time on the things money can’t buy.” – Haruki Murakami, The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle

“But even so, every now and then I would feel a violent stab of loneliness. The very water I drink, the very air I breathe, would feel like long, sharp needles. The pages of a book in my hands would take on the threatening metallic gleam of razor blades. I could hear the roots of loneliness creeping through me when the world was hushed at four o’clock in the morning.” – Haruki Murakami, The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle

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Who’s the maker

dear maker
when i think of you
my eyes shed tears
my lips issue a smile
my mind cant remember any sorry
my brain couldn’t recall any hurdles
all troubles seem to have been washed of as clouds by storm
all pains seems to have been washed of as dust by rain
in spite of you having may forms and names
in spite of you being any where and every where
i used to encounter problems
and these dissolve moment i think of you
wanted to make a list of complaints to you
realized to note that on the thought of you all these melt away

who are you where are you what are you i know
but i know that without nothing is possible
but i now have capability to fathom your potential
but i now that u are just a call away
but i now know that you are inside in me

My thoughts words and deeds make my life
My thoughts words and deeds make my world
whatever a human mind conceives it achieves
i am the maker as i make my world
and thus the maker is in me

Peace pristine

Shanti
Damsel of my dear life
determined am i to be with you
dedicated am i to get you you
desire i have to be enveloped by you
dead i will be if cant have you
dear damsel
do i still need food and water
dear life
do i still need wealth and wine
do i call you hope
do i call you contentment
do i call you truth
do i call you happiness
do i call you success
do i call you health of body mind and soul
dear damsel dear life
will you not be mine
why would you fly away like a butterfly among flower
why am made to chase you like this
why do you evade me
dear peace pristine
will you not be with me
dear peace pristine
will you not be mine
Shanti Shanthi Shantihi

Divine, Demon, Man ?

Divine, Demon, Man ?

There were thunderstorms
it was raining snow balls
all around was lightening and floods
everything was un precedented
who caused this
what created this
when it all started
why the damage to life and property could be contained
Disaster it was
Recovery was afar
everyone cried
everybody decried

is it god who created the universe
is it devil who created the earth
is it man who created the world
who is it who caused all this damage

why are lives put on this world in first place
why are lives pushed into this ocean of sorrow
why doesnt man learn to coexist with the world
why doesnt man care for life on this world

who is man to question god or devil
who is man to cause destruction to whosoever s creation

men destroyed eco friendliness
men destroyed earths bio diversity
men destroyed environmental
men destroyed eco balance
men in his greed exploited
men in his callousness neglected
warnings were ignored
signals were missed
nature was forced to unleash its fury
for it lost ability to contain and restrain
Tsunamis and Tornadoes
Volcanoes and Violent Floods
these are going to be order of day
raising sea level
melting glaciers
drying ground water level
disheartening dissapearing rain forests
these are the truth of today
no forests to cause clouds
no water for lives to quench thirst
no air pure to breathe
no land fit to live
all this man presented to world
and then blamed god and demon for the disasters

we are to blame ourselves
and it doesnt end there
its not enough for us to stop further damage
we also need to repair the already done damage
lets plant more trees
lets harvest more rain water
lets contain carbon footprint
lets restrain non bio degradable wastes
lets put off toxics
lets refuse plastic
lets reduce fossil fuel
lets reuse water
lets recycle paper
lets reforest and afforest
if men dont act to save the earth and its species
nature will act and men wont be able to save themselves

if we do not act now
tomorrow will be too late
for we may not exist to blame
god or devil and lay claim
for the disasters that has befallen on us

lets start one at a time,
now and here, lets go green

am i like you

am long as cobra
am tall as giraffe
am re silent as camel
am large as elephant
am powerful as alligator
am energetic as ant
am fast as cheetah
am swift as eagle
am soft as dove
am sharp as snake
am still am me
am still am not as you
i am me and you are you
and when will i be you
birds dont swift
fish dont fly
but i want to be you
and i just dont want to be me
i want to be you and nothing but you
i want to be you and nothing like me
am blind to by strengths
am envious of your abilities

i am i and i am not they
i am i and i am not you
you are you and you are not they
you are you and you are not me
this i dont understand agree appreciate or realize
thats why i say i can do as them
thats why i couldnt say i can do as me

after wasting most of life and many a opportunities of happiness

i know i cant fly
i know i shouldnt swim
i know i wouldnt be tall
i know i neednt be poisonous
i know i should be me
i know i shoulnt be you
what matters is how
harmless you are to society
helpful you are to community
your thoughts enrich world around
your actions empower others
it doesnt matter you couldnt be like them
it doesnt matter you are different
no attribute is good or bad
no attribute is big or small
all has its place
all has space
this i now know yes i know
hereafter
comparison is strict no no

expatriates

expatriates…
dear ones who go abroad for better prospects
dear ones who go off shore for greener pastures
what will you bring back, what do you earn
will you fetch riches of yonder world for the dollars you earn
why waste away your life in far away land
what is lacking in your mother land
why do you want to waste your life in far off land in solitude
when you could enjoy your family and friends with gratitude
why blame caste and class struggles here
where ever you go you are second class citizens for sure
by going abroad to farther shores
is what you get really a gain, ( and not pain)
is what you earn really the wealth( and not loss of health)
from simple baldness to painful prostrate
from simple belonging-ness to painful divorces
what do you earn what do you gain
is the price you pay worth the prosperity you anticipate
yes you could construct one or more houses for your family
but could you have a life home or a family
yes you could pay for capitation for your grown up children
but could you enjoy the growing up of your children
yes you could pay for the hospital bills for your aging parents
but could you be by their bedside when they want you
is money cure for all ills
is money cause of all ills
you bring riches
kith and kin enjoy your fetches
people back home fake happiness
and you on vacation fake contentment
you are like fishermen on sea
and your folks are like fisher woman on shores
you struggling hard to make their life easy with money you bring
they worried all the while for your well being and safety and not money your bring
all said and done
due to limitations in opportunities
due to limitations in mindset of people
due to limitations in resources by all means

we expats
we have to live with this brain drain
we have to live in the drain without brain
or else it will not rain remittances,for home
or else it will not add forex balances, for country
howsoever small and little it may be
these are the only way we could be of some use ..
these are the only things that we now know to do for you

Suitability Marital harmony

Cat and Dog gets married
crow and crane get wed
devil and divine marry each other
dog and donkey become man and wife
is it something wrong
is there something as THE RIGHT
how does it matter
what does it matter and why
if there is meeting of minds
if they can see ye to eye
if they add value to each other
if they bring peace to one another
if they can supplement and complement
if they see the stars and not thorns
if they are kind to virtues and blind to faults
the relationship will only flourish
and they will never perish
for class creed clan culture does little matter
and understanding, acceptance and tolerance only matter
and
if they cant see eye to eye
if they cant agree on many a silly thing
if they cant pursue each others well being
if they cant desist from destroying value
then there can be no consensus of minds
then there can be no agreement for togetherness
as long as they love each other over every thing else
as long as they love no questions asked they remain a family
as they remind blind to fault and kind to virtues
they remain man and wife
and will last for life
it doesnt matter whether one is
ant and other elephant
turtle and other is giraffe
wolf and other is lamb
palm and other is grass
you could celebrate life as man and wife all your life
if you pledge to add wholehearted value throughout life

cupids arrow

when a bullet strikes you may fall dead
but not when cupids arrow strikes
instead you wake up the possibilities
as romance replaces remorse
illiterate become poets
uninitiated become artists
ignorant become wise
invalid becomes heroic
necessity is mother of invention
romance is cause of all action
everything is in thought
if you love you will be loved
everything is in mind
as all creations thoughts words feelings originate in mind
you realize what you visualize
cupid or not
arrow or not
if you dream determine dedicate and decide
then you definitely deserve success
love opens many doors
love brings lucky charms
love induces great efforts
love causes large sacrifices
love makes world go round
love makes life safe and sound
terror can make the world come down on its knees
love can make the world stay at your feet
spread love not war
spread love not hate
spread love not fear
spread love not pain
spread peace spread hope spread happiness
love for lifes sake love for loves sake
for love opens all doors
for love answers all questions
for love resolves all mysteries
for love solves all problems
fall in love with the world around
lets not fall into the dark world

ambiguities

ambiguities
whats love and romance – undefined feeling
whats attraction and infatuation – unclassified expressions
whats tears and pain -unusual emotions
whats care and concern -uncalled behaviours
assumptions and presumptions -arent they illusions
fact and opinions -arent they statistics
but
for me you are
the rainbow among rainclouds
the diamond among minestones
the sun among stars
the hope among attributes
its you for sure,
for me its you, for sure,
my tears may be salty sweet or sour
my fears may be unsubstantiated ,not sure
my love is un adulterated ,am sure
my life with you is incomplete , and you are the only cure ambiguities are antiques here

Youth

Youth

your voice – is reminder of all seven notes
your sight – is reminder of all seven hues
your words -a sweet melody
your movements- a dance
your gait- most beautiful sight
no no am not blind and deaf
no no am not mad and invalid
yes am in love
yes am blown away
am pleased be your around
am blessed to see and hear the sound

many do realize the value when only lost
any price would pay to see you are not lost
youth dear
long to be with you for ever

I am overwhelmed

I am overwhelmed by

rain drops falling
flowing river
waves hitting the shore
breeze from valley
rainbow
sunset against clear blue sky
moonlit night
starfilled night sky
snow capped peaks
green valleys
oasis
flowers blooming in spring

and many such things
i did consider as gems of beauty
but
its you
my dear child
its you smiling at me
its you hugging me
its you
thats more beautiful than any of these
forever
i can keep searching for every
and will find
nothing sweeter than you
yes i am overwhelmed

May be

May be you regularly conveyed to
the breeze your love for me
the clouds your romantic feelings on me
the rivers about your longing for me
bees and flowers your waiting for me

these messages could not reach me,as i am in
no contact with fine breeze or clouds
no communication with fowers or flies
no touch with river or sea
as am lonely in a far away dry desert

my heart and mind does wonder and ponder as to
how do you do
what you may be aching for
why couldnt we communicate
when will we be together
am filled with questions so many as these
and am perturbed with answers for none of these

hear
for some more time please bear
all our problems we shall together steer clear
darling dear
have no fear
shortly i will be near
shed no tear
all is going to be well now and here

Goals

The Ten Commandments of Goal Setting

You shall set big goals. When the goals you’re aiming for are lofty, then you will develop thoughts, actions, and habits to help you achieve them. This self-development will become the foundation of your success. Big goals drive change, from which emerges the need for growth.
You shall write down your goals. A wise man once said that a goal that is never written down is only a wish.
You shall set your goals as early as you can. Goddard started at 15. Start now and write your goals down. As the entrepreneur and visionary Walt Disney said, “Don’t wait another day, “A person should set his goals as early as he can and devote all his energy and talent to getting there. With enough effort, he may achieve it. Or he may find something that is even more rewarding. But in the end, no matter what the outcome, he will know he has been alive.”
You shall break your goals down into bite-sized mini goals. Perhaps the most difficult part in setting goals is breaking them into manageable daily, weekly, and monthly bite-sized goals. For example, if one of your goals is “To be my ideal weight, have an athletic, fit body and eat food that is both nutritious and healthy,” then you must act every day, week, and month to make that a reality. Your plan may involve walking daily for forty-five minutes, lifting weights three times a week, and seeing a dietician to formulate a monthly eating plan.
You shall visualize it. Put a Sticky note on your mirror or computer screen and look at your goals everyday. Take a moment to reflect upon each of your achievable aspirations. Picture what it would be like to already be there. How does it feel, look, and smell? See yourself there and you will be.
You shall start with what you have. For example, you may have a goal of developing a retreat center for abused children. You have no money, nor even an idea of what such a project entails. Start with what you can do. On your day off, visit a real estate agent to talk about properties on the market, the size that would be required, and necessary permits. Or search the Internet for people already doing this and contact them. Or visit an established center and serve as a volunteer on your holidays. Research and learning are free.
You shall understand your personal rhythms and cycles. Everyone has natural rhythms and cycles, be they daily, weekly, or monthly. Do you know your rhythms and cycles? I recall reading about one of history’s great opera singers. She understood that to reach her goal of performing her best she needed to understand her cycles. In learning about her preparation, peak performance, and recovery she not only reached her goals but maintained them over a career spanning several decades. For example, perhaps you notice that you are most alert, intelligent, and decisive in the morning. You may also discover that early in the week you may be more analytical, but later in the week you are more creative. To achieve your goals, learn to work in harmony with such cycles.
You shall set deadlines. In order to stay on target with goals, it is important to set specific deadlines. Be certain, in setting deadlines, that you under-commit and over-deliver. Wise King Solomon once wrote, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick” (Prov. 13:12a). If you keep promising yourself something and it never happens, eventually you will grow despondent. Instead of a positive effect in life, your goals can turn into a negative consequence.
You shall be decisive. Success is a choice. Don’t achieve your parents’, partner’s, children’s, or best friend’s goals. Decide what you want, why you want it, and how you plan to achieve it. No one else can, will, or should do that for you.
You shall just do it. Action is a powerful force. Sometimes the greatest thing I have done has been to get out of my chair and take action. Some people are waiting for a sign or a feeling. Or they are waiting until they have enough money, education, and opportunity before actin

Anthakarana

In Hindu vedanta, “antahkarana” means in Sanskrit the inner cause; and it refers to the cobmination of both levels of mind, the buddhi, the intellect , and the manas, the mind which include the mental body ans is organised into four parts.
Ahamkāra (ego) – identified as  the Atman (self)  ‘I’
Buddhi (intellect) – controls  the decision making
Manas (mind) – controls sankalpas (will or resolution of mind)
Chitta (memory) – deals with remembering and forgetting
“antahkarana” also  refers to the entire psychological process, including mind and emotions, which are mentioned as a unit that functions with all parts working together as a whole.
Moreover  considering that mind are part and parcel of  body, : mano maya kosha – related to manas – the mind ‘s part related to five senses, and also craving for new and pleasant sensations and emotions, while buddhi (intellect, intelligence, capacity to reason), is related to vijnana maya kosha – the body part of consciousness, knowledge, intuition and experience are considered its constituents.

on FATHER: shared on whatsup by Soumya in tamil

💑👪💑👪💑👪💑
அப்பாக்கள்:
 
🌺ஒரு தந்தையாவது மிகவும் இலகுவானது.
ஆனால் 
ஒரு தந்தையாக இருப்பது மிகவும் கடினமானது.

🌺🚹அப்பா…
ஒரு மனிதன், பின்னாளில் தனக்கு சொந்தமாக்கி வைத்திருக்கிற துணிச்சலும், திடமும் அப்பா என்கிற அடிவேரிலிருந்து கிடைத்தது தான். ஒரு குழந்தையின் நடத்தை, பழக்க வழக்கம், பண்பு எல்லாவற்றுக்கும் முன்னுதாரணமான வழிகாட்டி தந்தையே.

🌺🚹கடவுள் மனித உயிர்களுக்கு அளித்த மிகப்பெரிய வெகுமதி தந்தை. ஒரு நல்ல தந்தை ஆயிரம் ஆசிரியர்களுக்கு சமமாக இருப்பார். எப்போதும் எங்களோடு கூட இருந்து வழிகாட்டுகிற இந்த அகல்விளக்கின் தியாகம் அளப்பரியது.

🚹🌺தன் குழந்தையை வளர்த்து ஆளாக்க பொருளாதார ரீதியாக தந்தைமார் சுமக்கிற சிலுவைகள் கனதியானவை. அதற்காக அவர்கள் படுகிற பாடுகள் வலிமிகுந்தவை.ا

🌺🚹ஒரு நல்ல தகப்பனுக்கு தன் குழந்தைகளின் வளர்ச்சி மீது இருக்கிற அக்கறையினதும், அங்கலாய்ப்பினதும் தீவிரம் வேறெந்த உறவுகளிடமும் இருக்காது. தம் குழந்தைகளின் எதிர்காலம் பற்றியே சதா சிந்திக்கும் அப்பாக்கள் அவர்களுக்காகவே தம் வாழ்க்கை முழுவதையும் தியாகம் செய்து விடுகின்றனர்.

🌺🚹அம்மா என்றால் அன்பு என்கின்றோம். ஆனால் வெளிக்காட்டிக் கொள்ளாத அப்பாக்களின் அன்பும் மிகுந்த ஆழமானது தான். அவர்களின் பாசமும் ஈரமானது தான்.

🌺🚹தம் பிள்ளைகளை நல்வழிப்படுத்தி கூட்டிச் செல்வதற்கு அவர்களுக்கு கண்டிப்பு அவசியமாகிறது. அதனாலென்னவோ பல அப்பாக்கள் தம் பிள்ளைகள் மீது கொண்டிருக்கிற தாய்க்கு நிகரான நேசத்தை மிகவும் இரகசியமாகவே வைத்திருக்கிறார்கள்.ا

🌺🚹தந்தை என்கிற சூரியனின் வெளிச்சம் நன்றாக கிடைத்துவிட்டால்

பிள்ளைத் தாவரங்கள் இயல்பாகவே செழித்து வளர்ந்து விடும். வாழ்வின் அனுபவப் பாடங்கள் அனைத்தினதும் மிகச் சிறந்த ஆசானாக ஒவ்வொரு இளைஞனுக்கும் யுவதிக்கும் அவரவர் அப்பாக்களே இருக்கிறார்கள்.

🌺🚹நாம் வாழும் சமூகத்திற்கு ஒரு நல்ல மனிதன் கிடைத்திருக்கிறான் என்றால் அவனுக்கு பின்னால் ஒரு பொறுப்பு மிக்க தந்தையின் கடும் உழைப்பும் தியாகமும் இருந்திருக்கிறதென்றே அர்த்தம்.

🌺🚹யானையின் பலம் தும்பிக்கையிலே என்பது எவ்வளவு தூரம் உண்மையானதோ.. அதைவிட உண்மையானது ஒரு மனிதனின் பலம் நம்பிக்கையிலே என்பது. ஒவ்வொரு மனித மனசுக்குள்ளும் ஓடிக்கொண்டிருக்கும் அந்த நம்பிக்கை நதியின் நதிமூலம் அவரவர் அப்பாக்களே!

🌺🚹ஒரு குழந்தை அப்பாவின் கைப்பிடித்துக் கொண்டு எடுத்து வைக்கிற முதல் அடியே நம்பிக்கை விதையின் பதியமிடல் நிகழ்வு.ر

🌺🚹விழவும், எழவும் வலிகளையும் வடுக்களையும் தாங்கிக் கொண்டு நடக்கவும் ஒரு அப்பாவிடமிருந்து குழந்தை பெறுகிற பயிற்சி அவசியமானது.

🌺🚹இருகைகள் தட்டி எழும் ஓசை போல அம்மா அப்பா என்கிற இரு உறவுகளின் ஆரோக்கியமான இணைப்பும் பிணைப்பும் இல்லாமல் ஒரு நல்ல மனிதனை இந்த சமூகம் பெற முடியாது.

🚺🚺ஒரு தாய் தன் குழந்தை தன்னுடனேயே இருக்க வேண்டுமென்கிற அன்பின் உச்சத்தில் அதனை இடுப்பில் கெட்டியாக சுமக்கிறாள்.

🚹🚹தந்தையோ தன் குழந்தை தன்னைவிட உயர்ந்த நிலைக்கு சென்றுவிட வேண்டுமென்ற துடிப்போடு தன் தோள்களில் தூக்கி சுமக்கிறார்.

🚹ஒவ்வொரு அப்பாக்களும் பிள்ளைகளுக்காக, அவர்களுக்கு கடைசிவரை தெரியாமலேயே இருந்துவிடுகிற எத்தனை துயரங்களை சந்தித்திருப்பார்கள்?

🚹பிள்ளைகளின் நல்வாழ்வுக்காக எத்தனை பேரிடம் உதவி கேட்டு நடந்திருப்பார்கள்?

🚹எத்தனை பேரிடம் கடன் வாங்கியிருப்பார்கள்?

அதை கட்டிமுடிக்க எவ்வளவு போராடியிருப்பார்கள்?

🚹எத்தனை இரவுகள் தூங்காது இருந்திருப்பார்கள்?

🚹எத்தனை பாரங்களை மனசில் சுமந்திருப்பார்கள்?

🚹முடியுதிர்ந்த மண்டையின் வெளிகளில்..

வெடிப்பு விழுந்திருக்கும் பாதங்களில்…

நரம்பு தெரியும் கைகளில் …

நரை விழுந்த மீசைகளில் …

அப்பாக்களின் உழைப்பின் வரலாறு அமைதியாய் குடிகொண்டிருக்கிறது.

🚹தன் பிள்ளைகள் தான் படும் துயரம் கண்டு வருந்திவிடக் கூடாதென்று அவர்களுக்கு முன்னால் தம் வலிகளை எப்படி மறைத்திருப்பார்கள்?

🚹ஆசைப்பட்டு பிள்ளைகள் கேட்கிற பொருட்களுக்காக எத்தனை மணி நேரங்கள் கூடுதலாக தம் வியர்வை சிந்தியிருப்பார்கள்?

🚹மனைவி, பிள்ளைகளை ஏற்றிய குடும்ப வண்டியை இழுத்துச் செல்வதற்காக அப்பா என்கிற தியாகப் படைப்பு தன்னுடலை எவ்வளவு தூரம் வருத்தியிருக்கக் கூடும்?

🚹பிள்ளைகள் தூக்கத்திலிருக்கும் போது அவர்களின் தூக்கம் கலையாமல் முத்தமிட்டுக்கொண்டு போர்த்தி விட்டு வேலைக்குப் போகிற அப்பாக்கள் பின்னர், பிள்ளைகள் தூங்கிவிட்ட பிறகு வீடு வந்து சேருகிற போது எப்படி தாங்கிக் கொள்கிறார்கள்? எத்தனை முறை மௌனமாக அழுதிருக்கும் அவர்கள் இதயங்கள்?

🚹இதற்கும் மேலாய் உழைப்புக்காகவே கடல் கடந்து சென்று கரைந்து போகும் அப்பாக்களின் அவல வாழ்க்கையை அவர்களால் எப்படி ஏற்றுக் கொள்ள முடிகிறது? வேலை இடைவெளிகளில் பிள்ளைகளின் குரல் கேட்டு உற்சாகம் ஏற்றிக் கொள்கிற அவர்களின் உழைப்பின் பின்னாலிருக்கிற உழைச்சலை எப்படி புரியவைப்பது?

🚹படுக்கையறை கட்டிலின் தலைப்பகுதியில் தன் மனைவி பிள்ளைகளின் புகைப்படத்தை ஒட்டி வைத்துக் கொண்டு சதா வலி சுமந்து வலி சுமந்து வாழ்க்கையை சுமந்து செல்கிற இந்த அப்பாமாரின் வாழ்க்கை எத்தனை கொடுமையானது?

🚹வீரம், துணிச்சல்,
விடாமுயற்சி,
நம்பிக்கை, உழைப்பு..
இவைகள் ஒரு நல்ல அப்பாவிடமிருந்து இளைஞன் யுவதிகளுக்கு இயல்பாகவே கிடைத்து விடுகிற பெரிய வெகுமதிகள்.

🌺ஒரு இளைஞனோ யுவதியோ வளர்ந்து பெரியவனான பிறகும்,

குழந்தைகளுக்கு பெற்றோரான பிறகும் அவர்களின் தந்தை தன் பிள்ளைகளை சிறு பிள்ளைகளாகவே பார்க்கிறார். பிள்ளைகளுக்கும் அப்பாவின் ஆலோசனைகள், வழிகாட்டல்கள், அனுபவப்பாடங்கள் என எல்லாம் எப்போதும் தேவைப்படுகின்றன.

“எதுக்கும் பயப்படாதே”

“ஒன்றுக்கும் யோசிக்காதே”

“எல்லாம் வெல்லலாம்”

“மனசை தளரவிடாதே”

“நான் இருக்கிறேன்”

இவையெல்லாம் அப்பாக்கள் தம் பிள்ளைகளின் செவிகளுக்குள் கடைசிவரைக்கும் திரும்பதிரும்ப சொல்லிக் கொள்கிற நம்பிக்கை தரும் ஒற்றைக் கட்டளைகள்.

🌺அவர்கள் வாய்களிலிருந்து பிள்ளைகளின் மனங்களுக்கு கடத்தப்படுகிற இந்த வார்த்தைகளின் வீரியம் வலிமையானது.

🌺தன் இயலாமையை தான் உணர்கிற ஒரு காலத்திலும் தந்தைமார் இந்த உற்சாகம் நிறைக்கிற வார்த்தைகளை சொல்ல மறப்பதேயில்லை. அவர்களுக்கு நன்றாகவே தெரியும் தம் பிள்ளைக்கு தமது குரலொன்றே போதுமென்பது.

🚹அப்பாக்கள்:

➡பிள்ளைகளின் சுமைதாங்கிகள்

➡பிள்ளைகளின் நெம்புகோல்கள்

➡பிள்ளைகளின் அச்சாணிகள்

➡பிள்ளைகளின் சூரியன்கள்

➡பிள்ளைகளின் திசைகாட்டிகள்

➡பிள்ளைகளின் ஆசிரியர்கள்

➡பிள்ளைகளின்
நம்பிக்கைகள்

🌺அப்பா:
தூய்மையான
அன்பு,

போலியற்ற
அக்கறை,

நேர்மையான வழிகாட்டல், 

நியாயமான
சிந்தனை, 

நேசிக்கத்தக்க உபசரிப்பு, 

மாறுதலில்லா நம்பிக்கை, 

காயங்களற்ற
வார்த்தை,  

கம்பீரமான
அறிவுரை,

கலங்கமில்லா
சிரிப்பு,

உண்மையான
அழுகை,

என அத்தனையும் உளமகிழ்ந்து 

செய்து வளர்த்தவர்.

தோழனுக்கு தோழனாய் 
தோள் கொடுத்தவர் அப்பா.
👪🌸👪🌸👪🌸👪

Chanakya at Dhanananda’ s court

‘Measure your words and hold your temper,’ Katyayan whispered urgently as Chanakya walked away from him.
‘Om! Salutations to Brihaspati and Sukra, the gurus of the gods and antigods, and the originators of the science of politics,’ started Chanakya as an opening invocation, facing Dhanananda seated on his royal throne with Rakshas standing at his right hand. ‘Om!’ chanted the assembly in chorus.
‘O enlightened teacher, how can society work in harmony towards the progress of the kingdom?’ asked Rakshas.
‘By performing one’s duty. The duties of a Brahmin are studying, teaching and interceding on man’s behalf with the gods. The duties of a Kshatriya are bearing arms and protecting all life. The duties of a Vaishya are trading, manufacturing and producing wealth. The duties of a Shudra are to serve the three higher varnas,’ declared Chanakya, knowing fully well that the king seated at the throne was a Shudra.
Rakshas was malevolently pleased. He had already lit the spark. It would not be too long before an explosion occurred. Surprisingly, Dhanananda maintained his composure and allowed the remark to slip.
‘Acharya, what should be the qualities of a king?’
‘An ideal king should be eloquent, bold, endowed with sharp intellect, strong memory and keen mind. He should be amenable to guidance. He should be strong and capable of leading the army. He should be just in rewarding and punishing. He should have foresight and avail himself of opportunities. He should be capable of governing in times of peace and times of war. He should know when to fight and when to make peace, when to lie in wait and when to strike. He should preserve his dignity at all times, be sweet in speech, straightforward and amiable. He should eschew passion, anger, greed, obstinacy, fickleness, and backbiting. He should conduct himself in accordance with the advice of elders—’
‘Oh shut up! I do not need this sermon!’ interrupted Dhanananda in a fit of rage. The court was stunned into a silence one could touch. Rakshas was at a loss for words. He had not expected such an instant result.
‘I agree with you, O King. You do not need my advice. My advice is meant for those who have the intrinsic capacity to absorb and implement my advice. You, unfortunately, have neither!’ thundered Chanakya. Katyayan cringed inwardly. Why had he brought Chanakya here? He had unwittingly placed his own hand within the lion’s jaws.
‘Rakshas! Who is this ugly oaf that you deem a revered teacher? He’s not fit to be amongst us, leave alone lecture us!’ demanded Dhanananda.
‘O noble King. He is Chanakya, the son of the dear departed Chanak,’ explained Rakshas slyly.
‘Ah! I now understand. When I ordered for that impudent dimwit’s head to be cut off, I should also have done the same for his son. Rats have a nasty habit of multiplying,’ observed Dhanananda.
‘Once again, I must agree with you, O King,’ said Chanakya, ‘you were unwise to leave me alive. An enemy should always be destroyed to the very final trace—just as I shall destroy you and your perverted dynasty one day,’ predicted Chanakya calmly.
‘Have this wretch arrested and sent to Nanda’s Hell. He can think up ways for my downfall under the tongs and probes of the talented Girika! Catch him by his puny pigtail as one catches a rat by its tail!’ shrieked Dhanananda as his royal guards moved towards Chanakya.
Chanakya’s hands went to his shikha and untied the knot that held the individual strands of hair together. In spite of his fury, Dhanananda’s curiosity was piqued and he remarked, ‘Untying your tail isn’t going to help you! A monkey shall always remain a monkey!’
‘O stupid and ignorant King, I have made it my sacred duty to unite the whole of Bharat so that it may stand up to the might of the foreign invaders at our doorstep. My first step shall be to expunge you from history. Today I take a sacred oath! I swear upon the ashes of my wise father and loving mother that I shall not re-tie my shikha until I have expelled you as well as the Macedonian invaders from my country and united it under an able and benevolent ruler!’ swore Chanakya as the guards caught hold of him by his now untied hair and dragged him towards Nanda’s Hell.

Teacher at takshila

students used to ask Chankya, who was intwrning As teaching assitant, rapid-fire questions which he would answer in his most witty and penetrating manner with little regard for political rectitude.
‘Acharya, you’re the most learned of teachers. Why shouldn’t you become a king?’
‘Honestly speaking. I don’t mind that I’m not king. I just have a problem that someone else is.’
‘Acharya, what is the reason for secrecy in government?’
‘If citizens don’t know what you’re doing, how on earth can they possibly tell what you’re doing wrong? That’s why secrecy is essential, my boy.’
‘Acharya, why do people seem to get away with not respecting the law of the land?’
‘If we want people to have respect for the law, then we must first make the law respectable, son.’
‘Acharya, isn’t the king actually a servant of the people?’
‘Correction. In order to become master, a ruler must profess to be a servant of the people.’
‘Acharya, how can the prime minister reduce the king’s burden in times of crisis or panic?’
‘Why do that? Rulers must be allowed to panic. They need to be kept busy with lots of crises. It’s their measure of achievement!’
‘Acharya, is it the sacred duty of the king to always speak the truth?’
‘Hah! The king doesn’t need the truth. What he most needs is something that he can tell the people, dear lad. After all, a good speech is not one in which you can prove that the king’s telling the truth, it’s one where no one else can prove he’s fibbing.’
‘Acharya, which are the freedoms that should be guaranteed to a citizen by the state?’
‘Hmm… let me see. It’s well known that a hungry man is more interested in four pieces of bread rather than four freedoms.’
‘Acharya, why should Brahmins like you be involved in politics?’
‘Politics is far too serious a matter to be left to politicians, son.’
‘Acharya, is war the only solution to political differences?’
‘Wise pupil, politics is war without bloodshed and war is simply politics with bloodshed.’
‘Acharya, don’t citizens have the right to know how their tax revenues are being used?’
‘Dear me. No, no, no. People don’t want to know how tax revenue has actually been spent. Does any worshipper ever ask the temple Brahmin what happened to the ritual offering made to the gods?’
‘Acharya, isn’t good government about acting on principles?’
‘Absolutely. Government is about principles. And the principle is, never act on principle.’
‘And are principles greater than money?’
‘Remember one central tenet, lad. When anybody says, “It isn’t the money, it’s the principle”, they actually mean that it’s the money.’
‘Acharya, what’s the ideal amount of time that should be spent by the king’s council debating an issue?’
‘Well, if you don’t want the council to spend too long over something, make it the last item on their agenda before refreshments.’
‘Acharya, should a king go to war to uphold law and justice?’
‘The king should always be on the side of law and justice, as long as he doesn’t allow it to come in the way of foreign policy.’
‘Acharya, what should the punishment be for a prime minister who keeps the king ignorant of happenings in the kingdom?’
‘My son, kings are ignorant not because prime ministers do not give them the right answers but because they do not ask their prime ministers the right questions. And here endeth the lesson!’

Mock interview for admission to Takshila university

‘What is the purpose of good government, Chanakya?’ asked the admissions director. They were seated on the floor in his office, a sparsely decorated room filled with musty scrolls, parchments and manuscripts. The room smelt of the eucalyptus oil lamps that illuminated the area in the evening.
The reply from Chanakya was prompt and confident. ‘In the happiness of his subjects lies the king’s happiness and in their welfare, his own welfare,’ he replied emphatically.
‘Son, what are the duties of a king?’
‘A ruler’s duties are three. Raksha—protecting the state from external aggression; palana—maintenance of law and order within; and finally, yogakshema—welfare of the people.’
‘O son of Chanak, what are the possible means by which a king can settle political disputes?’
‘There are four possible methods, sir. Sama—gentle persuasion and praise; daama—monetary incentives; danda—punishment or war; and bheda—intelligence, propaganda and disinformation.’
‘What is the difference between a kingdom, a country, and its people?’
‘There cannot be a country without people, and there is no kingdom without a country. It’s the people who constitute a kingdom; like a barren cow, a kingdom without people yields nothing.’
‘What constitutes a state, wise pupil?’
‘There are seven constituent elements, learned teacher. The king, the council of ministers, the territory and populace, the fortified towns, the treasury, the armed forces and the allies.’
‘Why does a king need ministers at all?’
‘One wheel alone does not move a chariot. A king should appoint wise men as ministers and listen to their advice.’
‘What is the root of wealth?’
‘The root of wealth is economic activity, and lack of it brings material distress. In the absence of fruitful economic activity, both current prosperity and future growth are in danger of destruction. In the manner that elephants are needed to catch elephants so does one need wealth to capture more wealth.’
‘What is an appropriate level of taxation on the people of a kingdom?’
‘As one plucks fruits from a garden as they ripen, so should a king have revenue collected as it becomes due. Just as one does not collect unripe fruits, he should avoid collecting revenue that is not due because that will make the people angry and spoil the very sources of revenue.’
‘To what extent should a king trust his revenue officials?’
‘It is impossible to know when a fish swimming in water drinks some of it. Thus it’s quite impossible to find out when government servants in charge of undertakings misappropriate money.’
‘How important is punishment in the administration of a kingdom?’
‘It is the power of punishment alone, when exercised impartially in proportion to the guilt, and irrespective of whether the person punished is the crown prince or an enemy slave, that protects this world and the next.’
‘How should a king decide which kings are his friends and which are his enemies?’
‘A ruler with contiguous territory is a rival and the ruler next to the adjoining is to be deemed a friend. My enemy’s enemy is my friend.’
The admissions director looked at the boy in amazement. He then turned to Pundarikaksha and smiled. ‘I have no doubts regarding his knowledge, analytical skills and intelligence, but who will pay his tuition?’ he asked. The dean grinned sheepishly. ‘My childhood chum Katyayan has called in a loan, my friend. I shall bear the cost personally,’ he revealed.
Chanakya prostrated himself before Pundarikaksha and requested him to accept the ten gold panas that remained from the fifty that Katyayan had provided for his trip. ‘Keep it, Chanakya. I will call in the loan as and when I deem appropriate,’ declared Pundarikaksha. ‘You shall unite the whole of Bharat; your brilliance shall be a flame that attracts kings like fireflies until they are humbled into submission; arise, Chanakya, our motherland needs you,’ pronounced the dean. The grateful lad touched Pundarikaksha’s feet wordlessly and left.
‘I wonder whether this one really needs a Takshila education,’ whispered the admissions director to the dean as Chanakya left.

Intention W Dyer

Seven Faces of Intention

1. The face of creativity. The first of the seven faces of intention is the creative expression of the power of intention that designed us, got us here, and created an environment that’s compatible with our needs. The power of intention has to be creative or nothing would come into existence. It seems to me that this is an irrefutable truth about intention/spirit, because its purpose is to bring life into existence in a suitable environment. Why do I conclude that the life-giving power of intention intends us to have life, and have it in increasing abundance? Because, if the opposite were true, life as we know it couldn’t come into form.

The very fact that we can breathe and experience life is proof to me that the nature of the life-giving Spirit is creative at its core. This may seem obvious to you, or in fact it may appear confusing, or even irrelevant. But what is clear is: You are here in your physical body; there was a time when you were an embryo, before that a seed, and before that formless energy. That formless energy contained intention, which brought you from no where to now here. At the very highest levels of awareness, intention started you on a path toward your destiny. The face of creativity intends you toward continued creativity to create and co-create anything that you direct your power of intention toward. Creative energy is a part of you; it originates in the life-giving Spirit that intends you.

2. The face of kindness. Any power that has, as its inherent nature, the need to create and convert energy into physical form must also be a kindly power. Again, I’m deducing this from the opposite. If the all-giving power of intention had at its core the desire to be unkind, malevolent, or hurtful, then creation itself would be impossible. The moment unkind energy became form, the lifegiving Spirit would be destroyed. Instead, the power of intention has a face of kindness. It is kind energy intending what it’s creating to flourish and grow, and to be happy and fulfilled. Our existence is proof to me of the kindness of intention. Choosing to be kind is a choice to have the power of intention active in your life.

The positive effect of kindness on the immune system and on the increased production of serotonin in the brain has been proven in research studies. Serotonin is a naturally occurring substance in the body that makes us feel more comfortable, peaceful, and even blissful. In fact, the role of most antidepressants is to stimulate the production of serotonin chemically, helping to ease depression. Research has shown that a simple act of kindness directed toward another improves the functioning of the immune system and stimulates the production of serotonin in both the recipient of the kindness and the person extending the kindness. Even more amazing is that persons observing the act of kindness have similar beneficial results. Imagine this! Kindness extended, received, or observed beneficially impacts the physical health and feelings of everyone involved! Both the face of kindness and the face of creativity are smiling here.

When you’re unkind, you’re blocking the face of kindness. You’re moving away from the power of intention. No matter whether you call it God, Spirit, Source, or intention, be aware that unkind thoughts weaken, and kind thoughts strengthen, your connection. Creativity and kindness are two of the seven faces of intention.

3. The face of love. The third of the seven faces of intention is the face of love. That there’s a life-giving nature inherent in the power of intention is an irrefutable conclusion. What would we name this quality that encourages, enhances, and supports all of life, if not love? It’s the prime moving power of the Universal Spirit of intent. As Ralph Waldo Emerson put it: “Love is our highest word and the synonym for God.”

The energy field of intention is pure love resulting in a nurturing and totally cooperative environment. Judgment, anger, hate, fear, or prejudice won’t thrive here. So, were we able to actually see this field, we’d see creativity and kindness in an endless field of love. We entered the physical world of boundaries and beginnings through the universal force field of pure love. This face of intention that is an expression of love wishes only for us to flourish and grow, and become all that we’re capable of becoming. When we’re not in harmony with the energy of love, we’ve moved away from intention and weakened our ability to activate intention through the expression of love. For example, if you aren’t doing what you love and loving what you do, your power of intention is weakened. You attract into your life more of the dissatisfaction that isn’t the face of love. Consequently, more of what you don’t love will appear in your life.

Thoughts and emotions are pure energy; some higher and faster than others. When higher energies occupy the same field as lower energies, the lower energies convert to higher energies. A simple example of this is a darkened room that has lower energy than a room bathed in light. Since light moves faster than non-light, when a candle is brought into a dark room, the darkness not only dissolves and disappears, but it seems magically converted into light. The same is true of love, which is a higher/faster energy than the energy of hate.

St. Francis, in his famous prayer, beseeches God: “Where there is hatred, let me sow love.” What he is seeking is the power to dissolve and ultimately convert hate to the energy of love. Hate converts to love when the energy of love is in its presence. This is true for you, too. Hate, directed toward yourself or others, can be converted to the life-giving, love-granting life force of intention. Pierre Teilhard de Chardin put it this way: “The conclusion is always the same: Love is the most powerful and still the most unknown energy of the world.”

4. The face of beauty. The fourth of my seven faces of intention is the face of beauty. What else could a creative, kind, and loving expression be, other than beautiful? Why would the organizing intelligence of intention ever elect to manifest into form anything that’s repugnant to itself? Obviously, it wouldn’t. So we can conclude that the nature of intention has an eternal interaction of love and beauty, and add the expression of beauty to the face of a creative, kind, loving power of intention.

John Keats, the brilliant young romantic poet, concludes his Ode on a Grecian Urn with: “’Beauty is truth, truth beauty,’ that is all/ Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.” Obviously truth exists in the creation of everything. It’s true that it shows up here in form. It’s now here in a form that’s an expression of the invisible creative power. So, I agree with Keats that we need to silently know that truth and beauty are one and the same. Out of the truth of the originating spirit in an expression of the power of intention comes truth as beauty. This knowing leads to valuable insights in relation to exercising your individual will, imagination, and intuition.

In order to grasp the significance of beauty as one of the faces of intention, remember this: Beautiful thoughts build a beautiful soul. As you become receptive to seeing and feeling beauty around you, you’re becoming attuned to the creative power of intention within everything in the natural world, including yourself. By choosing to see beauty in everything, even a person who was born into poverty and ignorance will be able to experience the power of intention. Seeking beauty in the worst of circumstances with individual intent connects one to the power of intention. It works. It has to work. The face of beauty is always present, even where others see non-beauty.

I was deeply honored to be on a panel with Viktor Frankl in 1978 in Vienna, Austria. I strongly recollect that he shared with me and the audience his assertion that it’s the ability to see beauty in all of life’s circumstances that gives our lives meaning. In his book Man’s Search for Meaning, he describes a bowl of filthy water with a fish head floating in it, given to him by his Nazi captors in a concentration camp during WWII. He trained himself to see beauty in this meal, rather than focus on the horror of it. He attributed his ability to see beauty anywhere as a vital factor in surviving those horrific camps. He reminds us that if we focus on what’s ugly, we attract more ugliness into our thoughts, and then into our emotions, and ultimately into our lives. By choosing to hang on to one’s corner of freedom even in the worst situations, we can process our world with the energy of appreciation and beauty, and create an opportunity to transcend our circumstances.

I love the way Mother Teresa described this quality when she was asked, “What do you do every day in the streets of Calcutta at your mission?” She responded, “Every day I see Jesus Christ in all of his distressing disguises.”

5. The face of expansion. The elemental nature of life is to increase and seek more and more expression. If we could sharply focus on the faces of intention, we’d be startled. I imagine that one of the faces we’d see is a continuously expanding expression of the power of intention. The nature of this creative spirit is always operating so as to expand. Spirit is a forming power. It has the principle of increase, meaning that life continues to expand toward more life. Life as we know it originates from formless intention. Therefore, one of the faces of intention looks like something that’s eternally evolving. It might look like a tiny speck in a continuous state of duplicating itself, and then enlarging itself, and then moving forward, all the while continuing its expansion and expression.

This is precisely what’s happening in our physical world. This fifth face of intention takes the form of what is expressing it. It can be no other way, for if this ever-expanding force disliked itself or felt unconnected, it could only destroy itself. But it doesn’t work that way. The power of intention manifests as an expression of expanding creativity, kindness, love, and beauty. By establishing your personal relation to this face of intention, you expand your life through the power of intention, which was, is, and always will be, a component of this originating intention. The power of intention is the power to expand and increase all aspects of your life. No exceptions! It’s the nature of intention to be in a state of increased expression, so it’s true for you, too.

The only proviso to this forward movement of intention is to cooperate with it everywhere and allow this spirit of increase to express itself through you and for you, and for everyone you encounter. Then you will have no worry or anxiety. Trust the face of expansion and do what you do because you’re loving what you do and doing what you love. Know that expansive, beneficial results are the only possibilities.

6. The face of unlimited abundance. This sixth face of intention is an expression of something that has no boundaries, is everywhere at once, and is endlessly abundant. It’s not just huge, it never stops. This marvelous gift of abundance is what you were created from. Thus you too share this in the expression of your life. You’re actually fulfilling the law of abundance. These gifts are given freely and fully to you just as the air, the sun, the water, and the atmosphere are provided in unlimited abundance for you.

From the time of your earliest memories, you probably were taught to think in terms of limitations. My property starts here. Yours over there. So we build fences to mark our boundaries. But ancient explorers gave us an awareness of the world as potentially endless. Even more ancient astronomers pushed back our beliefs about an immense dome-shaped ceiling covering the earth. We’ve learned about galaxies that are measured in the distance light travels in a year. Science books that are only two years old are outdated. Athletic records that supposedly demonstrated the limits of our physical prowess are shattered with amazing regularity.

What all this means is that there are no limits to our potential as people, as collective entities, and as individuals. This is largely true because we emanate from the unlimited abundance of intention. If the face of the power of intention is unlimited abundance, then we can know that our potential for manifestation and attracting anything into our lives is the same. The face of abundance has absolutely no limits. Imagine the vastness of the resources from which all objects are created. Then consider the one resource that stands above all others. This would be your mind and the collective mind of humankind. Where does your mind begin and end? What are its boundaries? Where is it located? More important, where is it not located? Is it born with you, or is it present before your conception? Does it die with you? What color is it? What shape? The answers are in the phrase unlimited abundance. You were created from this very same unlimited abundance. The power of intention is everywhere. It is what allows everything to manifest, to increase, and to supply infinitely.

Know that you’re connected to this life force and that you share it with everyone and all that you perceive to be missing. Open to the expression of the face of unlimited abundance, and you’ll be co-creating your life as you’d like it to be. As is so often true, the poets can express in a few short words what seems so difficult for us to grasp. Here is Walt Whitman speaking to us in Song of Myself. As you read these lines, substitute the face of endless abundance for God to gain a flavor of what the power of intention is.

I hear and behold God in every object, yet understand
God not in the least…
I see something of God each hour of the twenty-four,
and each moment then,
In the faces of men and women I see God, and
in my own face in the glass;
I find letters from God dropt in the street,
and every one is signed by God’s name,
And I leave them where they are, for I know
that whereso’er I go
Others will punctually come forever and ever.
You don’t have to have an intellectual understanding. It’s enough to silently know and proceed to live with your awareness of this face of endless abundance.

7. The face of receptivity. This is how I imagine the seventh face, the receptive face of intention. It’s simply receptive to all. No one and no thing is rejected by the receptive face of intention. It welcomes everyone and every living thing, without judgment—never granting the power of intention to some and withholding it from others. The receptive face of intention means to me that all of nature is waiting to be called into action. We only need to be willing to recognize and receive. Intention can’t respond to you if you fail to recognize it. If you see chance and coincidence governing your life and the world, then the universal mind of intention will appear to you as nothing but an amalgamation of forces devoid of any order or power.

Simply put, to be unreceptive is to deny yourself access to the power of intention. In order to utilize the all-inclusive receptivity of intention, you must produce within yourself an intelligence equal in affinity to the universal mind itself. You must not only become receptive to having guidance available to you to manifest your human intentions, but you must be receptive to giving this energy back to the world. As I’ve said many times in speeches and earlier writings, your job is not to say how, it’s to say yes! Yes, I’m willing. Yes, I know that the power of intention is universal. It’s denied to no one.

The face of receptivity smiles on me, as what I need flows to me from the Source, and the Source is receptive to my tapping in to it to co-create books, speeches, videos, audios, and anything else that I’ve been fortunate enough to have on my résumé. By being receptive, I’m in harmony with the power of intention of the universal creative force. This works in so many different ways. You’ll see the right people magically appearing in your life; your body healing; and if it’s something that you want, you’ll even discover yourself becoming a better dancer, card player, or athlete! The field of intention allows everything to emanate into form, and its unlimited potential is built into all that has manifested even before its initial birth pangs were being expressed.

friends turning enemies

Men are more ready to repay an injury than a benefit, because gratitude is a burden and revenge a pleasure
TACITUS, c. A.D. 55-120

The problem is that you often do not know your friends as well as you imagine. Friends often agree on things in order to avoid an argument. They cover up their unpleasant qualities so as to not offend each other. They laugh extra hard at each other’s jokes. Since honesty rarely strengthens friendship, you may never know how a friend truly feels. Friends will say that they love your poetry, adore your music, envy your taste in clothes—maybe they mean it, often they do not.
When you decide to hire a friend, you gradually discover the qualities he or she has kept hidden. Strangely enough, it is your act of kindness that unbalances everything. People want to feel they deserve their good fortune. The receipt of a favor can become oppressive: It means you have been chosen because you are a friend, not necessarily because you are deserving. There is almost a touch of condescension in the act of hiring friends that secretly afflicts them. The injury will come out slowly: A little more honesty, flashes of resentment and envy here and there, and before you know it your friendship fades. The more favors and gifts you supply to revive the friendship, the less gratitude you receive

Trust

THE SNAKE. THE FARMER. AND THE HERON

A snake chased by hunters asked a farmer to save its life. To hide it from its pursuers, the farmer squatted and let the snake crawl into his belly. But when the danger had passed and the farmer asked the snake to come out, the snake refused. It was warm and safe inside. On his way home, the man saw a heron and went up to him and whispered what had happened. The heron told him to squat and strain to eject the snake. When the snake snuck its head out, the heron caught it, pulled it out, and killed it. The farmer was worried that the snake’s poison might still be inside him, and the heron told him that the cure for snake poison was to cook and eat six white fowl. “You’re a white fowl,” said the farmer. “You’ll do for a start.” He grabbed the heron, put it in a bag, and carried it home, where he hung it up while he told his wife what had happened. “I’m surprised at you, ” said the wife. “The bird does you a kindness, rids you of the evil in your belly, saves your life in fact, yet you catch it and talk of killing it. She immediately released the heron, and it flew away. But on its way, it gouged out her eyes.
Moral: When you see water flowing uphill, it means that someone is repaying a kindness.
AFRICAN FOLK TALE
Lord, protect me from my friends; I can take care of my enemies.
Voltaire, 1694-1778

Richard carlson on feelings

Listen to Your Feelings (They Are Trying to Tell You Something) 

You have at your disposal a foolproof guidance system to navigate you through life. This system, which consists solely of your own feelings, lets you know whether you are off track and headed toward unhappiness and conflict – or on track, headed toward peace of mind. Your feelings act as a barometer, letting you know what your internal weather is like.

When you’re not caught up in your thinking, taking things too seriously, your feelings will be generally positive. They will be affirming that you are using your thinking to your advantage. No mental adjustment needs to be made.

When your experience of life is other than pleasant – when you’re feeling angry, resentful, depressed, stressed out, frustrated, and so forth, your warning system of feelings kicks in like a red flag to remind you that you are off track, that it’s time to ease up on your thinking, you’ve lost perspective. Mental adjustment does need to be made. You can think of your negative feelings in the same way you think of the warning lights on the dashboard of your car. When flashing, they let you know that it’s time to ease up.

Contrary to popular belief, negative feelings don’t need to be studied and analyzed. When you analyze your negative feelings, you’ll usually end up with more of them to contend with.

The next time you’re feeling bad, rather than getting stuck in “analysis paralysis,” wondering why you feel the way you do, see if instead you can use your feelings to guide you back in the direction toward serenity. Don’t pretend that the negative feelings don’t exist, but try to recognize that the reason you’re feeling sad, angry, stressed, or whatever is that you are taking life too seriously – you are “sweating the small stuff.” Instead of rolling up your sleeves and fighting life, back off, take a few deep breaths, and relax. Remember, life isn’t an emergency unless you make it so

Discovering love languages

Love Languages  by Gary D. Chapman

Discovering the primary love language of your spouse is essential if you are to keep his/her emotional love tank full. But first,  make sure you know your own emotional love languages,  Words of Affirmation , Quality Time , Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, Physical Touch

What is your primary love language? What makes you feel most loved by your spouse? What do you desire above all else? If the answer to those questions does not leap to your mind immediately, perhaps it will help to look at the negative use of love languages.

What does your spouse do or say or fail to do or say that hurts you deeply?If your primary love language is used negatively by your spousethat is, he does the oppositeit will hurt you more deeply than it would hurt someone else because not only is he neglecting to speak your primary love language, he is actually using that language as a knife to your heart.

What have I most often requested of my spouse? Whatever you have most requested is probably in keeping with your primary love language. Those requests have probably been interpreted by your spouse as nagging. They have been, in fact, your efforts to secure emotional love from your spouse.

Have you heard your spouse say, I have felt neglected and unloved because seldom did he/she ever respond to my request, and not exited at so many other special things they do !

Another way to discover your primary love language is to examine what you do or say to express love to your spouse. Chances are what you are doing for her is what you wish she would do for you. !!(only a possible clue,not an absolute indicator)

If you have difficulty discovering your primary love language then either you are an Individual whose emotional love tank has been full for a long tim as your spouse has expressed love in many ways, and you are not certain which of those ways makes you feel most loved and now you simply knows that you are loved or you are an individual whose love tank has been empty for so long that you doesnt remember what makes him feel loved
Ask yourself, What did I like about my spouse in those days? What did he/she do or say that made me desire to be with her/him?What would be an ideal spouse to me? If I could have the perfect mate, what would she/he be like?

Spend some time writing down what you think is your primary love language. Then list the other four in order of importance and most importantly tell each other what you consider to be your own primary love language
Then regulary check On a scale of zero to ten, how is your love tank tonight?What could I do differently to help fill it little more?untill you reach a situation that you know what you have to do or you are doing and its beneficial effects and the need to check is no more there ! This will happen after one makes a request to fill the tank and other responds appropriately and learns to intiate without request in due course, ie both of you have the opportunity to do a reading on your love tank and to make a suggestion toward filling it.
Note that When your spouse says, What could I do to help fill your tank?your suggestions will likely cluster around your primary love language. You may request things from all five love languages, but you will have more requests centering on your primary love language. Same with what you hear from your spouse.
Learn it well, so that you know what is essential for your and what is the need of your spouse.

Loving your children : Garry Chapman

CHILDREN AND LOVE LANGUAGES

When you dont know their primary love language, pour on all five and you are bound to hit it; but if you observe their behavior, you can learn their primary love language rather early.
Adults struggle with self-esteem and feel unloved all their lives when their primary love language is violated in  a detrimental manner during childhood. Many do not remember much of what their parents said, but they do remember what their parents did.
Observe your children. Watch how they express love to others. That is a clue to their love language.
As parents, we often try to pour all of our children into the same mold.
The problem is that each child is different, and what communicates love to one child may not communicate love to another.

WORDS OF AFFIRMATION :
Negative, critical, demeaning words strike terror to  psyche. As the child gets older, we tend to condemn him for his failures rather than commend him for his successes, and this empties his emotional love tank.
QUALITY TIME :You must get down on the childs level if you eventually want to lead him to the adult world;enter into those new interests  he/she devlops if you want to meet his/her needs; giving undivided attention showing you care and really enjoy being with them and it is important for you !When you do not give attention in early days they are likely to seek the attention of peers during the adolescent years and turn away from parents who may at that time desperately desire more time with their children.
RECEIVING GIFTS
Unless Gift is the primary love language of the child, gifts may mean little emotionally to the child. The parent has good intentions, but he/she is not meeting the emotional needs of the child by giving gifts
If the gifts you give are quickly laid aside, if the child seldom says thank you, if the child does not take care of the gifts that you have given, if she does not prize those gifts, chances are Receiving Gifts is not her primary love language. If, on the other hand, your child responds to you with much thanksgiving, if she shows others the gift and tells others how wonderful you are for buying the gift, if she takes care of the gift, if she puts it in a place of prominence in her room and keeps it polished, if she plays with it often over an extended period of time, then perhaps Receiving Gifts is her primary love language.
ACTS OF SERVICE
If your child is often expressing appreciation for ordinary acts of service, that is a clue that they are emotionally important to him or her. Your acts of service are communicating love in a meaningful way. When you help him with a science project, it means more than a good grade. It means My parent loves me. When you fix a bicycle, you do more than get him back on wheels. You send him away with a full tank.
PHYSICAL TOUCH
Babies who are handled often develop better emotionally than babies who are not.Your teenager may not appreciate such behavior in the presence of peers, but that doesnt mean that he does not want to be touched, especially if it is his primary love language.

Most parents sincerely love their children at the same time thousands of parents have failed to communicate love in the proper language and lots of children out there are living with an empty emotional tank.

Perhaps you do not feel loved by your older children and that is When you realize that the change is necessary
Try saying I have tried to show you my love by _______, but Im now realizing that that probably has not communicated love to you, that your love language is probably something different. I am beginning to think that your love language is probably _______. You know, I really do love you, and I hope that in the future I can express it to you in better ways

Loving the unlovable is a choice. Garry chapman

LOVE MAKES THE DIFFERENCE

Love is not our only emotional need
If I feel loved by my spouse, I can relax, knowing that my lover will do me no ill. I feel secure in his/her presence. I may face many uncertainties in my vocation. I may have enemies in other areas of my life, but with my spouse I feel secure.
My sense of self-worth is fed by the fact that my spouse loves me. After all, if he/she loves me, I must be worth loving. My parents may have given me negative or mixed messages about my worth, but my spouse knows me as an adult and loves me. Her love builds my self-esteem.
The need for significance is the emotional force behind much of our behavior. Life is driven by the desire for success. We want our lives to count for something. We have our own idea of what it means to be significant, and we work hard to reach our goals.

In the context of marriage, if we do not feel loved, our differences are magnified. We come to view each other as a threat to our happiness. We fight for self-worth and significance, and marriage becomes a battlefield rather than a haven.Love is not the answer to everything, but it creates a climate of security in which we can seek answers to those things that bother us. In the security of love, a couple can discuss differences without condemnation.Two people who are different can learn to live together in harmony. We discover how to bring out the best in each other.

The decision to love your spouse holds tremendous potential

Have you heard a Woman say: I want him to sit on the couch with me and give me some time, look at me, talk to me about us, about our lives.(crying for attention -quality time )
and the man say : A perfect wife would be a wife who would come home in the afternoon and fix dinner for me. I would be working in the yard, and she would call me in to eat. After dinner, she would wash the dishes. I would probably help her some, but she would take the responsibility. She would sew the buttons on my shirt when they fall off.(Acts of Service)

LOVING THE UNLOVELY

When the tank is lowwe have no love feelings toward our spouse but simply experience emptiness and pain.

If one continues a pattern of demanding and condemning, it would destroy the marriage eventually, for it stimulates hurt anger and hate.

Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat youDo to others as you would have them do to you. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you-BIBLE

Since love is such a deep emotional need, the lack of it is perhaps our deepest emotional pain , but,emotional need could be met and positive feelings could be engendered again, if we could learn to speak each others primary love language; and when that need is being met, we tend to respond positively to the person who is meeting it.

If you claim to have feelings that you do not have, that is hypocritical. But if you express an act of love that is designed for the other persons benefit or pleasure, it is simply a choice.

AND For most wives, the desire to be sexually intimate with their husbands grows out of a sense of being loved by their husbands. If they feel loved, then they desire sexual intimacy. If they do not feel loved, they likely feel used in the sexual context. That is why loving someone who is not loving you is extremely difficult. It goes against our natural tendencies.

If you claim to have feelings that you do not have, that is hypocritical and such false communication is not the way to build intimate relationships. But if you express an act of love that is designed for the other persons benefit or pleasure, it is simply a choice. You are not claiming that the action grows out of a deep emotional bonding. You are simply choosing to do something for his/her benefit., and overall benefit of the marriage.

Make the request something specific, not general. Dont say, You know, I wish we would spend more time together. Thats too vague. How will you know when hes done it? But if you make your request specific, he will know exactly what you want and you will know that, when he does it, he is choosing to do something for your benefit.If he does it, fine; if he doesnt do it, fine. But when he does it, you will know that he is responding to your needs.In the process, you are teaching him your primary love language because the requests you make are in keeping with your love language . Ask for suggestions on how you could improve. His suggestions will be a clue to his primary love language. If he makes no suggestions, guess his love language based on the things he has complained about over the years. Periodically  ask your spouse for feedback on how you are doing and for further suggestions.

Love Language #5 by Gary D. Chapman

Love Language #5  by Gary D. Chapman
PHYSICAL TOUCH
Babies who are held, hugged, and kissed develop a healthier emotional life than those who are left for long periods of time without physical contact.In Adulthood, For some individuals, physical touch is their primary love language. Without it, they feel unloved. With it, their emotional tank is filled, and they feel secure in the love of their spouse
Tiny tactile receptors are located throughout the body. When those receptors are touched or pressed, nerves carry impulses to the brain. The brain interprets these impulses and we perceive that the thing that touched us is warm or cold, hard or soft. It causes pain or pleasure. We may also interpret it as loving or hostile. Sexual intercourse, however, is only one dialect in the love language of physical touch.
Physical touch can make or break a relationship ie  neurological basis of the sense of touch and its psychological importance can communicate hate or love.Your spouse may find some touches uncomfortable or irritating.
GUYS  Dont insist on touching her in your way and in your time. Learn to speak her love dialect. Dont make the mistake of believing that the touch that brings pleasure to you will also bring pleasure to her.Explicit or Implicit.
Remember You are learning to speak his/her language and so it might be a long trial and error process with frequent fair feedback .
THE BODY IS FOR TOUCHING-but not for abuse
To touch my body is to touch me. To withdraw from my body is to distance yourself from me emotionally and it stems  fromm the fact When on rare occasions one man refuses to shake hands with another, it communicates a message that things are not right in their relationship. All societies have some form of physical touching as a means of social greeting.
There are appropriate and inappropriate ways to touch members of the opposite sex in every society , whether in public or in private it the cultural and personal aspect that matters
Those who do not object todays openness and freedom. on moral grounds eventually object on emotional grounds.Something about our need for intimacy and love does not allow us to give our spouse such freedom.The emotional pain is deep and intimacy evaporates when we are aware that our spouse is involved with someone else sexually.That for which he longs so deeplylove expressed by physical touch is now being given to another; making the emotional love tank  not just empty; but has been riddled by an explosion; ultimately requiring lots of effort to repair.
CRISIS AND PHYSICAL TOUCH
Almost instinctively in a time of crisis, we hug one another. Why? Because physical touch is a powerful communicator of love. In a time of crisis, more than anything, we need to feel loved. We cannot always change events, but we can survive if we feel loved.Death Disease and Disappointments are a part of life. The most important thing you can do for your mate in a time of crisis is to love him or her.Your words may mean little, but your physical touch will communicate that you really care and will be remembered
One might say ‘Spending time with me is what made me feel loved and appreciated, giving me attention. It really didnt matter whether we hugged or kissed. As long as he gave me his attention, I felt loved’
while the other would  decide not take the initiative to  reach out and touch for fear of rejection, feeling of unwanted, and unloved, insecure about the response , all the while having no idea about the feelings and expectations.
Very few seem to possess all the commonalities that are supposed to assure fewer conflicts in marriage.
Most sexual problems in marriage have little to do with physical but everything to do with meeting emotional needs.
For the male, sexual desire is physically based. That is, the desire for sexual intercourse is stimulated by the buildup of sperm cells and seminal fluid in the seminal vesicles. When the seminal vesicles are full, there is a physical push for release. Thus, the males desire for sexual intercourse has a physical root.But if he does not enjoy physical touch at other times and in nonsexual ways, it may not be his Primary love language at all.Sexual desire is quite different from his emotional need to feel loved
For the female, sexual desire is rooted in her emotions, not her physiology. There is nothing physically that builds up and pushes her to have intercourse. Her desire is emotionally based. If she feels loved and admired and appreciated by her husband, then she has a desire to be physically intimate with him. But without the emotional closeness she may have little physical desire.

Its not how fast you learn it but how well you learn it that matters
Discovering the primary love language of your spouse is essential if you are to keep his/her emotional love tank full. But first,  make sure you know your own emotional love languages,  Words of Affirmation , Quality Time , Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, Physical Touch
What is your primary love language? What makes you feel most loved by your spouse? What do you desire above all else? If the answer to those questions does not leap to your mind immediately, perhaps it will help to look at the negative use of love languages. What does your spouse do or say or fail to do or say that hurts you deeply?

Love Language #4 by Gary D. Chapman

Love Language #4 by Gary D. Chapman
ACTS OF SERVICE
By acts of service, we mean doing things you know your spouse would like you to do. You seek to please her/her by serving , to express your love for them by doing things for them to please them comfort them care for them.They require thought, planning, time, effort, and energy. If done with a positive spirit, they are indeed expressions of love.Serve one another in love.
Requests give direction to love, but demands stop the flow of love.In fact, love is always freely given. Love cannot be demanded. We can request things of each other, but we must never demand anything.In brief, you would do things for him/her to express your love
Make a list three or four things that if he/she chose to do them would make you feel loved when you walk into the house; likewise list of things that you would really like to have his/her  help in doing, which, if he chose to do them, would help you know that he/she loved you.

Even if the partners  had the same primary love language they might be having so much difficulty if they were speaking different dialects ie They were doing things for each other but not the most important things as considered by the other.
Before marriage, we are carried along by the force of the in-love obsession. After marriage, we revert to being the people we were before we “”fell in love.”” Our actions are influenced by the model of our parents, our own personality, our perceptions of love, our emotions, needs, and desires. What we do for each other before marriage is no indication of what we will  do after
Love is a choice and cannot be coerced.Criticism and demands tend to drive wedges.With enough criticism, you may get acquiescence from your spouse. He may do what you want, but probably it will not be an expression of love. You can give guidance to love by making requests,but you cannot create the will to love.If we choose to love, then expressing it in the way in which our spouse requests will make our love most effective emotionally.
People tend to criticize their spouse most loudly in the area where they themselves have the deepest emotional need. Their criticism is an ineffective way of pleading for love. If we understand that, it may help us process their criticism in a more productive manner. A wife may say to her husband after he gives her a criticism, It sounds like that is extremely important to you. Could you explain why it is so crucial? Criticism often needs clarification. Initiating such a conversation may eventually turn the criticism into a request rather than a demand.
Servant OR Lover?
Due to the sociological changes and cultural upheavals of the recent past, there is no longer a common stereotype of the male and female role in todays society
When we treat our spouses as objects, we preclude the possibility of love. Manipulation by guilt (If you were a good spouse, you would do this for me) is not the language of love. Coercion by fear (You will do this or you will be sorry) is alien to love.Love says, I love you too much to let you treat me this way. It is not good for you or me.
OVERCOMING STEREOTYPES
Before the days of television, Nuclear family, or both partners carrer oriented,a persons idea of what a husband or wife should do and how he or she should relate was influenced primarily by ones own parents.  Whatever your perceptions, chances are your spouse perceives marital roles somewhat differently than you do. A willingness to examine and change stereotypes is necessary in order to express love more effectively. Remember, there are no rewards for maintaining stereotypes, but there are tremendous benefits to meeting the emotional needs of your spouse
It doesnt come easily, learning the primary love language of your spouse and choosing to speak it makes a tremendous difference in the emotional climate of a marriage, for you may have  to work hard at tearing down the stereotype with which he had lived for so many years

Love Language #3 by Gary D. Chapman

Love Language #3 by Gary D. Chapman
RECEIVING GIFTS
Gift giving was a part of the love-marriage process from time immemorial in all cultures of the world.Is the attitude of love always accompanied by the concept of giving?
A gift is something you can hold in your hand and say, Look, he was thinking of me,or, She remembered me.The gift itself is a symbol of fond thought.It doesnt matter whether it costs money. What is important is that you thought of them.
Gifts are visual symbols of love.Gifts come in all sizes, colors, and shapes and costs.Gifts may be purchased, found, or made. Gifts need not be expensive or unique.
If receiving gifts is my primary love language, I will place great value on the ring you have given me and I will wear it with great pride. I will also be greatly moved emotionally by other gifts that you give through the years. I will see them as expressions of love. Without gifts as visual symbols, I may question your love.
Make a list of all the gifts your spouse has expressed excitement about receiving through the years..kind of gifts your spouse would enjoy receiving. In the meantime, select gifts that you feel comfortable purchasing, making, or finding, and give them to your spouse. Dont wait for a special occasion
GIFTS AND MONEY
Each of us has an individualized perception of the purposes of money, and we have various emotions associated with spending it. Some of us have a spending orientation. We feel good about ourselves when we are spending money. Others have a saving and investing perspective.
You may even be hesitant since you dont purchase things for yourself, Why should you purchase things for your spouse?
Know that by giving GIFTS  You are investing in your relationship and filling your spouses emotional love tank, and with a full love tank, he or she will likely reciprocate emotional love to you in a language you will understand so that your marriage will take on a whole new dimension.
THE GIFT OF SELF
There is an intangible gift that sometimes speaks more loudly than a gift that can be held in ones hand. The gift of presence.Being there when your spouse needs you speaks loudly about your priority.Physical presence in the time of crisis is the most powerful gift you can give
Verbalize that to your spouse if presence is important to you,
Try to get her/him a gift every day for one week and see if it made any difference and then , maybe not every day,but at least once a week.
For some individuals, gifts worth has nothing to do with monetary value and everything to do with love, the intention, the act, the discipline.

At the heart of love is the spirit of giving..
If your spouses primary love language is receiving gifts, you can become a proficient gift giver. In fact, it is one of the easiest love languages to learn.If receiving gifts is his/her primary love language, almost anything you give will be received as an expression of love.
Learning the right love language was the key to helping another person feel loved

Love Language #2 by garry d chapman

Love Language #2
QUALITY TIME
By quality time,we mean giving someone your undivided attention not sitting on the couch watching television together but looking at each other and talking, giving each other your undivided attention to the conversation. It means taking a walk, just the two of you, or going out to eat and looking at each other and talking. Have you ever noticed that in a restaurant, you can almost always tell the difference between a dating couple and a married couple?
TOGETHERNESS
A central aspect of quality time is togetherness, not just proximity Togetherness has to do with focused attention
Quality time does not mean that we have to spend our together moments gazing into each others eyes. It means that we are doing something together and that we are giving our full attention to the other person. The activity in which we are both engaged is incidental. The important thing emotionally is that we are spending focused time with each other. The activity is a vehicle that creates the sense of togetherness
What happens on the emotional level is what matters. Our spending time together in a common pursuit communicates that we care about each other, that we enjoy being with each other, that we like to do things together.
QUALITY CONVERSATION
It is one with sympathetic dialogue where two individuals are sharing their experiences, thoughts, feelings, and desires in a friendly, uninterrupted context. If your spouses primary love language is quality time, such dialogue is crucial to his or her emotional sense of being loved.
Words of affirmation focus on what we are saying, whereas quality conversation focuses on what we are hearing.
It means I will have to focus on drawing you out, listening sympathetically to what you have to say. I will ask questions, not in a badgering manner but with a genuine desire to understand your thoughts, feelings, and desires.
Many of usare trained to analyze problems and create solutions. We forget that marriage is a relationship, not a project to be completed or a problem to solve.May be what the spouse wants is sympathy not suggestions when they talk to you about problems.
While she longed for him to focus attention on her by listening to her pain and frustration, he was not focusing on listening but on speaking.
We must be willing to give advice but only when it is requested and never in a condescending manner.We are far more efficient in thinking and speaking. Learning to listen may be as difficult as learning a foreign language, but learn we must, if we want to communicate love
1. Maintain eye contact when your spouse is talking 2. Dont listen to your spouse and do something else at the same time 3. Listen for feelings. Ask yourself, What emotion is my spouse experiencing?4. Observe body language..body speaks one message while words from lips speak another..5. Refuse to interrupt and  interject your own ideas.
LEARNING TO TALK
Quality conversation requires self-revelation
When you let the spouse know what you are thinking or feeling presently -it would lead to intimacy.
Many adults grew up in homes where the expression of thoughts and feelings was not encouraged but condemned since as  child they learnt  that expressing feelings or desires is not appropriate for he/she was made to feel guilty and disappointed again and again.
If you need to learn the language of quality conversation, begin by noting the emotions you feel away from home.
Three times each day, ask yourself, What emotions have I felt in the last three hours? Note  down the events and associated the feelings so that you will develop an awareness of your emotional nature. Now communicate your emotions and the events briefly with your spouse as many days as possible. Remember, emotions themselves are neither good nor bad. They are simply our psychological responses to the events of life and form basis of our decisions.
In each of lifes events, we have emotions, thoughts, desires, and eventually actions. It is the expression of that process that we call self-revelation.
PERSONALITY TYPES
Not all of us are out of touch with our emotions, but when it comes to talking, all of us are affected by our personality. One type receives many experiences, emotions, and thoughts throughout the day but are perfectly happy not to talk about it at all.Another type is whatever enters into the eye gate or the ear gate comes out the mouth gate and there are seldom sixty seconds between the two.In fact if no one is at home to talk to, they will call someone else.
We are influenced by our personality but not controlled by it.
One way to learn new patterns is to establish a daily sharing time in which each of you will talk about three things that happened to you that day and how you feel about them
QUALITY ACTIVITIES
Here The emphasis is on being together, doing things together, giving each other undivided attention; include anything in which one or both of you have an interest. The emphasis is not on what you are doing but on why you are doing it. The purpose is to experience something together, to walk away from it feeling  He/she cares about me and willing to do what i enjoy.
You may not love symphony but your purpose in life is to love your Wife and to express it in a way she appreciates you need to take her to the symphony concert..! , if that is what she loves.
The essential ingredients in a quality activity are: (1) at least one of you wants to do it, (2) the other is willing to do it, (3) both of you know why you are doing its to express love by being together and also ..they provide a memory bank from which to draw in the years ahead…
Because it is just as essential to our marriage as meals are to our health, we had to find time for these .
Whats in it for me? The pleasure of living with a spouse who feels loved and knowing that I have learned to speak his or her love language fluently.

What makes one person feel loved emotionally is not always the thing that makes another person feel loved emotionally (the same way/in the same sense)

Love lanuguage 1 by Garry Chapman

Love Language #1
AFFIRMATION
The object of love is not getting something you want but doing something for the well-being of the one you love. It is a fact, however, that when we receive affirming words we are far more likely to be motivated to reciprocate.
Know that verbal compliments are far greater motivators than nagging words
The object of love is not getting something you want but doing something for the well-being of the one you love. It is a fact, however, that when we receive affirming words we are far more likely to be motivated to reciprocate and do something our spouse desires.
ENCOURAGEMENT
The word encourage means “to inspire courage.” All of us have areas in which we feel insecure. We lack courage, and that lack of courage often hinders us from accomplishing the positive things that we would like to do. The latent potential within your spouse in his or her areas of insecurity may await your encouraging words. Your words may give your spouse the courage necessary to take that first step.
We not talking about pressuring your spouse to do something that you want butnencouraing in an area they already have an interest
Until she has the desire, your words will fall into the category of preaching. Such words seldom encourage and may turn outnsounding rejection instead of love
Realize that life’s deepest meaning is not found in accomplishments but in relationships.
Encouragement requires empathy and seeing the world from your spouse’s perspective. We must first learn what is important to our spouse.
Most of us have more potential than we will ever develop. What holds us back is often courage. A loving spouse can supply that all-important catalyst. Of course, you need to learn to do so.
Kindness
Love is kind. If then we are to communicate love verbally, we must use kind words. That has to do with the way we speak. The same sentence can have two different meanings, depending on how you say it. build intimacy by sharing your feelings snd emotions in proper tone, seeking   for an opportunity to discuss a hurt in order to find healing
You will seek understanding and reconciliation, and not to prove your own perception as the only logical way to interpret what has happened. That is mature love—love to which we aspire if we seek a growing marriage.
Love doesn’t keep a score of wrongs. Love doesn’t bring up past failures. None of us is perfect. In marriage we do not always do the best or right thing
We can ask for forgiveness and try to act differently in the future. Having confessed my failure and asked forgiveness, I can do nothing more to mitigate the hurt it may have caused my spouse. When I have been wronged by my spouse and she has painfully confessed it and requested forgiveness, I have the option of justice or forgiveness. If,  I choose to forgive, intimacy can be restored. Forgiveness is the way of love. Forget. Forbear. do not mess up every new day with yesterday bringing into today the failures of yesterday and in so doing,  pollute a potentially wonderful day.
If we are to develop an intimate relationship, we need to know each other’s desires. If we wish to love each other, we need to know what the other person wants
We can choose to live today free from the failures of yesterday. Forgiveness is not a feeling; it is a commitment. It is a choice to show mercy, not to hold the offense up against the offender. Forgiveness is an expression of love. “I love you. I care about you, Even though my feelings of hurt may linger, I will not allow what has happened to come between us. I hope that we can learn from this experience. You are not a failure because you have failed. You are my spouse, and together we will go on from here”
Humility
Love makes requests, not demands. In marriage, however, we are equal, adult partners. We are not perfect to be sure, but we are adults and we are partners. If we are to develop an intimate relationship, we need to know each other’s desires. The way we express those desires, however, is all-important. If they come across as demands, we have erased the possibility of intimacy and will drive our spouse away. If, however, we make known our needs and desires as requests, we are giving guidance, not ultimatums.
When you make a request of your spouse, you are affirming his or her worth and abilities. You are in essence indicating that she has something or can do something that is meaningful and worthwhile to you. When, however, you make demands, you have become not a lover but a tyrant. Your spouse will feel not affirmed but belittled. A request introduces the element of choice. Your mate may choose to respond to your request or to deny it, because love is always a choice. That’s what makes it meaningful. To know that my spouse loves me enough to respond to one of my requests communicates emotionally that she he cares about me, respects me, admires me, and wants to do something to please me. We cannot get emotional love by way of demand
deepest human need is the need to feel appreciated. Words of affirmation will meet that need in many individuals.
Key is.. express verbal appreciation for the things you like about the other person and, for the moment, suspending your complaints about the things you do not like.
Decide to Make this expression of affirmative love deliberate and determined effort.
Garry chapman

richard carlson on denial

Acknowledge the Totality of Your Being

Zorba the Greek was said to have described himself as “the whole catastrophe.” The truth is, we’re all the whole catastrophe, only we wish that we weren’t. We deny the parts of ourselves that we deem unacceptable rather than accepting the fact that we’re all less than perfect.

One of the reasons it’s important to accept all aspects of yourself is that it allows you to be easier on yourself, more compassionate. When you act or feel insecure, rather than pretending to be “together,” you can open to the truth and say to yourself, “I’m feeling frightened and that’s okay.” If you’re feeling a little jealous, greedy, or angry, rather than deny or bury your feelings, you can open to them, which helps you move through them quickly and grow beyond them. When you no longer think of your negative feelings as a big deal, or as something to fear, you will no longer be as frightened by them. When you open to the totality of your being you no longer have to pretend that your life is perfect, or even hope that it will be. Instead you can accept yourself as you are, right now.

When you acknowledge the less than perfect parts of yourself, something magical begins to happen. Along with the negative, you’ll also begin to notice the positive, the wonderful aspects of yourself that you may not have given yourself credit for, or perhaps even been aware of. You’ll notice that while you may, at times, act with self-interest in mind, at other times you’re incredibly selfless. Sometimes you may act insecure or frightened, but most often you are courageous. While you can certainly get uptight, you can also be quite relaxed. Opening to the totality of your being is like saying to yourself, “I may not be perfect, but I’m okay just the way I am.” When negative characteristics arise you can begin to recognize them as part of a bigger picture. Rather than judging and evaluating yourself simply because you’re human, see if you can treat yourself with loving-kindness and great acceptance. You may indeed be “the whole catastrophe,” but you can relax about it. So are the rest of us

richard carlson on being quiet

Quiet the Mind
Pascal said, “All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.” I’m not sure I would go quite this far, but I am certain that a quiet mind is the foundation of inner peace. And inner peace translates into outer peace.
Although there are many techniques for quieting the mind, such as reflection, deep breathing, contemplation, and visualization, the most universally accepted and regularly used technique is meditation. In as little as five to ten minutes a day, you can train your mind to be still and quiet. This stillness can be incorporated into your daily life, making you less reactive and irritable, and giving you greater perspective to see things as small stuff rather than as emergencies. Meditation teaches you to be calm by giving you the experience of absolute relaxation. It teaches you to be at peace.

There are many different forms and variations of meditation.

Essentially, however, meditation involves emptying your mind. Usually, meditation is done alone in a quiet environment. You close your eyes and focus your attention on your breathing and out, in and out. As thoughts enter your mind, you gently let them go and bring your attention back to your breath. Do this over and over again. Over time, you’ll train yourself to keep your attention on your breath as you gently dismiss any stray thoughts.
You’ll quickly discover that meditation isn’t easy. You will notice that your mind will fill with thoughts the moment you attempt to keep it still. It’s rare for a beginner to be able to focus attention for more than a few seconds. The trick to becoming an effective mediator is to be gentle on yourself and to be consistent. Don’t be discouraged. A few minutes each day will reap tremendous benefits, over time. You can probably find a meditation class in your community. Or, if you prefer, you can learn from a book or, better yet, an audiotape. (It’s hard to read with your eyes closed.) My favorite resource is Larry Le Shan’s How to Meditate, available in both book and audio format. I don’t know many people I would consider to be at peace with themselves who haven’t spent at least a little time experimenting with meditation.

richard carlson on being content

Think of What You Have Instead of What You Want 
In over a dozen years as a stress consultant, one of the most pervasive and destructive mental tendencies I’ve seen is that of focusing on what we want instead of what we have. It doesn’t seem to make any difference how much we have; we just keep expanding our list of desires, which guarantees we will remain dissatisfied. The mind-set that says “I’ll be happy when this desire is fulfilled” is the same mind-set that will repeat itself once that desire is met.
A friend of ours closed escrow on his new home on a Sunday.

The very next time we saw him he was talking about his next house that was going to be even bigger! He isn’t alone. Most of us do the very same thing. We want this or that. If we don’t get what we want we keep thinking about all that we don’t have – and we remain dissatisfied. If we do get what we want, we simply recreate the same thinking in our new circumstances. So, despite getting what we want, we still remain unhappy. Happiness can’t be found when we are yearning for new desires.

Luckily, there is a way to be happy. It involves changing the emphasis of our thinking from what we want to what we have. Rather than wishing your spouse were different, try thinking about her wonderful qualities. Instead of complaining about your salary, be grateful that you have a job. Rather than wishing you were able to take a vacation to Hawaii, think of how much fun you have had close to home. The list of possibilities is endless!
Each time you notice yourself falling into the “I wish life were different” trap, back off and start over. Take a breath and remember all that you have to be grateful for. When you focus not on what you want, but on what you have, you end up getting more of what you want anyway. If you focus on the good qualities of your spouse, she’ll be more loving. If you are grateful for your job rather than complaining about it, you’ll do a better job, be more productive, and probably end up getting a raise anyway. If you focus on ways to enjoy yourself around home rather than waiting to enjoy yourself in Hawaii, you’ll end up having more fun. If you ever do get to Hawaii, you’ll be in the habit of enjoying yourself. And, if by some chance you don’t, you’ll have a great life anyway.
Make a note to yourself to start thinking more about what you have than what you want. If you do, your life will start appearing much better than before. For perhaps the first time in your life, you’ll know what it means to feel satisfied.

richard carlson on being relaxed

Relax

What does it mean to relax? Despite hearing this term thousands of times during the course of our lives, very few people have deeply considered what it’s really about.

When you ask people (which I have done many times) what it means to relax, most will answer in a way that suggests that relaxing is something you plan to do later – you do it on vacation, in a hammock, when you retire, or when you get everything done. This implies, of course, that most other times (the other 95 percent of your life) should be spent nervous, agitated, rushed, and frenzied. Very few actually come out and say so, but this is the obvious implication. Could this explain why so many of us operate as if life were one great big emergency? Most of us postpone relaxation until our “in basket” is empty. Of course it never is.
It’s useful to think of relaxation as a quality of heart that you can access on a regular basis rather than something reserved for some later time. You can relax now. It’s helpful to remember that relaxed people can still be superachievers and, in fact, that relaxation and creativity go hand in hand. When I’m feeling uptight, for example, I don’t even try to write. But when I feel relaxed, my writing flows quickly and easily.
Being more relaxed involves training yourself to respond differently to the dramas of life-turning your melodrama into a mellow-drama. It comes, in part, from reminding yourself over and over again (with loving kindness and patience) that you have a choice in how you respond to life. You can learn to relate to your thinking as well as your circumstances in new ways. With practice, making these choices will translate into a more relaxed self.

richard carlson on negative self defeating thoughts

Argue for Your Limitations, and They’re Yours

Many people spend a great deal of energy arguing for their own limitations; “I can’t do that,”
“I can’t help it, I’ve always been that way,”

“I’ll never have a loving relationship,” and thousands of other negative and self-defeating statements.

Our minds are powerful instruments. When we decide that something is true or beyond our reach, it’s very difficult to pierce through this self-created hurdle. When we argue for our position, it’s nearly impossible. Suppose, for example, you tell yourself, “I can’t write.” You’ll look for examples to prove your position. You’ll remember your poor essays in high school, or recall how awkward you felt the last time you sat down to write a letter. You’ll fill your head with limitations that will frighten you from trying. In order to become a writer or anything else, the first step is to silence your greatest critic – you.

I had a client who told me, “I’ll never have a good relationship. I always screw them up.” Sure enough, she was right. Whenever she met someone, she would, without even knowing it, look for reasons for her new partner to leave her. If she were late for a date, she would tell him, “I’m always late.” If they had a disagreement, she would say, “I’m always getting into arguments.” Sooner or later, she would convince him that she wasn’t worthy of his love. Then she would say to herself,
“See, it happens every time. I’ll never have a good relationship.”

She had to learn to stop expecting things to go wrong. She needed to “catch herself” in the act of arguing for her own limitations. When she started to say, “I always do that,” she needed instead to say, “That’s ridiculous. I don’t always do anything.” She had to see that arguing for her limitations was just a negative habit that could easily be replaced with a more positive habit. Today, she’s doing much better. When she reverts to her old habit, she usually laughs at herself.

I have learned that when I argue for my own limitations, very seldom do I disappoint myself. I suspect the same is true for you.

richard carlson on keeping score

When in Doubt about Whose Turn It Is to Take Out the Trash Go Ahead and Take It Out

If we’re not careful, it’s easy to become resentful about all the responsibilities of daily living. Once, in a very low mood, I figured out that on an average day, I do over 1,000 different things. Of course, when I’m in a better mood, that number is significantly lower.

As I think about it, it’s astounding to me how easy it is for me to remember all the chores that I do, as well as all the other responsibilities that I take care of. But, at the same time, it’s easy for me to forget all the things that my wife does on a daily basis. How convenient!

It’s really difficult to become a contented person if you’re keeping score of all you do. Keeping track only discourages you by cluttering your mind with who’s doing what, who’s doing more, and so forth. If you want to know the truth about it, this is the epitome of “small stuff.” it will bring you far more joy to your life to know that you have done your part and someone else in your family has one less thing to do, than it will to worry and fret over whose turn it is to take out the trash.

The strongest argument against this strategy is the concern that you’ll be taken advantage of. This mistake is similar to believing it’s important that you’re right. Most of the time it’s not important that you’re right, and neither is it important if you take the trash out a few more times than your spouse or housemate. Making things like garbage less relevant in your life will undoubtedly free up more time and energy for truly important things.

express love: richard carlson

Tell Three People (Today) How Much You Love Them
Author Stephen Levine asks the question, “If you had an hour to live and could make only one phone call – who would you call, what would you say, and why are you waiting?” What a powerful message!
Who knows what we are waiting for? Perhaps we want to believe we will live forever, or that “someday” we will get around to telling the people we love how much we love them. Whatever the reasons, most of us simply wait too long.
As fate would have it, I’m writing this strategy on my grandmother’s birthday. Later today, my father and I are driving out to visit her grave site. She died about two years ago. Before she passed away, it became obvious how important it was to her to let her family know how much she loved us all. It was a good reminder that there is no good reason to wait. Now is the time to let people know how much you care. Ideally, you can tell someone in person or over the phone. I wonder how many people have been on the receiving end of a phone call where the caller says, “I just called to tell you how much I love you!” You may be surprised that almost nothing in the world means so much to a person. How would you like to receive the same message?
If you’re too shy to make such a phone call, write a heartfelt letter instead. Either way, you may find that as you get used to it, letting people know how much you love them will become a regular part of your life. It probably won’t shock you to know that, if it does, you’ll probably begin receiving more love as a result.

Should you fight ? by richard carlson

Choose Your Battles Wisely

“Choose your battles wisely” is a popular phrase in parenting but is equally important in living a contented life. It suggests that life is filled with opportunities to choose between making a big deal out of something or simply letting it go, realizing it doesn’t really matter. If you choose your battles wisely, you’ll be far more effective in winning those that are truly important.

Certainly there will be times when you will want or need to argue, confront, or even fight for something you believe in. Many people, however, argue, confront, and fight over practically anything, turning their lives into a series of battles over relatively “small stuff.” There is so much frustration in living this type of life that you lose track of what is truly relevant.

The tiniest disagreement or glitch in your plans can be made into a big deal if your goal (conscious or unconscious) is to have everything work out in your favor. In my book, this is nothing more than a prescription for unhappiness and frustration.
The truth is, life is rarely exactly the way we want it to be, and other people often don’t act as we would like them to.

Moment to moment, there are aspects of life that we like and others that we don’t. There are always going to be people who disagree with you, people who do things differently, and things that don’t work out. If you fight against this principle of life, you’ll spend most of your life fighting battles.

A more peaceful way to live is to decide consciously which battles are worth fighting and which are better left alone. If your primary goal isn’t to have everything work out perfectly but instead to live a relatively stress-free life, you’ll find that most battles pull you away from your most tranquil feelings. Is it really important that you prove to your spouse that you are right and she is wrong, or that you confront someone simply because it appears as though he or she has made a minor mistake?
Does your preference of which restaurant or movie to go to matter enough to argue over it? Does a small scratch on your car really warrant a suit in small claims court? Does the fact that your neighbor won’t park his car on a different part of the street have to be discussed at your family dinner table? These and thousands of other small things are what many people spend their lives fighting about. Take a look at your own list. If it’s like mine used to be, you might want to reevaluate your priorities.
If you don’t want to “sweat the small stuff,” it’s critical that you choose your battles wisely. If you do, there will come a day when you’ll rarely feel the need to do battle at all.

Some Select Self-Help Book Toppers that could change your life

“Anatomy of the Spirit” by Caroline Myss

"As a Man Thinketh" by James Allen

"Ask and It Is Given" by Esther and Jerry Hicks

"Atlas Shrugged" by Ayn Rand

"Awaken the Giant Within" by Anthony Robbins

"Beyond Survival" by Gerald Coffee

"Blink" by Malcolm Gladwell

"Building the Bridge As You Walk On It" by Robert E Quinn

"Built to Last" by James C Collins and Jerry IPorras

"Clear Leadership" by Gervase Bushe

"Conversations with God" by Neale DonaldWalsch

"Crucial Conversations" by Kerry Patterson

"Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff" by Richard Carlson and Kristine Carlson

"Embracing Change" by Tony Buzan

"Emotional Intelligence" by Daniel Goleman

"Execution: the Discipline of Getting ThingsDone" by Larry Bossidy and Ram Charan

"Facilitation" by Trevor Bentley

"Finding Your Strength In Difficult Times" byDavid Viscott

"First Break All the Rules" by Curt Coffman and Marcus Buckingham

"First Things First" by Stephen Covey

"Follow Your Heart" by Andrew Matthews

"Future Shock" by Alvin Toffler

"Getting Things Done" by David Allen

"Getting to Yes" by Roger Fischer and WilliamUry

“Good to Great" by Jim Collins

"How to Win Friends and Influence People" byDale Carnegie

"How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" byDale Carnegie

"Illusions" by Richard Bach

"I’m OK, You’re OK" by Thomas Harris

"In Search of Excellence" by Tom Peters andRobert Waterman

"Jonathan Livingston Seagull" by Richard Bach

"Killing Sacred Cows" by Garrett Gunderson

"Lateral Thinking" by Edward de Bono

"Leadership and Self-Deception" by The Arbinger Institute

"Lessons from the Monkey King" by Arthur F Carmazzi

"Love Is the Killer App" by Tim Sanders

"Love Leadership" by John Bryant

"Made to Stick" by Chip and Dan Heath

"Man’s Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl

"Many Lives, Many Masters" by Brian Weiss

"Now Discover Your Strengths" by Marcus Buckingham and Donald O Clifton

"Our Iceberg is Melting" by John Kotter and Holger Rathgeber

"Outliers" by Malcolm Gladwell

"Psychocybernetics" by Maxwell Maltz

"Purple Cow" by Seth Godin

"Rich Dad, Poor Dad" by Robert Kiyosaki and Sharon Lechter

"Rules of the Red Rubber Ball" by Kevin Carroll

"Stumbling on Happiness" by Daniel Gilbert

"Talent Is Overrated" by Geoff Colvin

"Thanks: the Science of Gratitude" by Robert Emmons

"The 100 Absolutely Unbreakable Laws of Business Success" by Brian Tracy

"The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership" by John Maxwell

"The 360 Degree Leader" by John Maxwell

"The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen R Covey

"The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho

"The Art of Effortless Living" by Ingrid Bacci

"The Art of Joyful Living" by Swami Rama

“The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron

"The Celestine Prophecy" by James Redfield

"The Education of Little Tree" by Forrest Carter

"The Fountainhead" by Ayn Rand

"The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz

“The Goal” by Eliyahu M Goldratt

"The Greatest Miracle in the World" by Og Mandino

"The Greatness Guide" by Robin Sharma

"The Last Lecture" by Randy Pausch

"The Law of Attraction" by Michael Losier

"The Magic of Thinking Big" by David Schwartz

"What Did You Say?" by Charles N Seashore,Edith Whitfield Seashore, and Gerald M Weinberg

"What Got You Here Won’t Get You There" by Marshall Goldsmith

"Who Moved My Cheese?" by Spencer Johnson

"Who’s Got Your Back?" by Keith Ferrazzi

"Why Should Anyone Be Led By You?" by Rob Goffee and Gareth Jones

"You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise Hay

"You Can Negotiate Anything" by Herb Cohen

"You Can Win" by Shiv Khera

"Your Erroneous Zones" by Wayne Dyer

is life fair?

Surrender to the Fact that Life Isn’t Fair
A friend of mine, in response to a conversation we were having about the injustices of life, asked me the question, “Who said life was going to be fair, or that it was even meant to be fair?” Her question was a good one. It reminded me of something I was taught as a youngster: Life isn’t fair. It’s a bummer, but it’s absolutely true. Ironically, recognizing this sobering fact can be a very liberating insight.

One of the mistakes many of us make is that we feel sorry for ourselves, or for others, thinking that life, should be fair, or that someday it will be. It’s not and it won’t. When we make this mistake we tend to spend a lot of time wallowing and/or complaining about what’s wrong with life. We commiserate with others, discussing the injustices of life.
“It’s not fair,” we complain, not realizing that, perhaps, it was never intended to be.

One of the nice things about surrendering to the fact that life isn’t fair is that it keeps us from feeling sorry for ourselves by encouraging us to do the very best we can with what we have. We know it’s not “life’s job” to make everything perfect, it’s our own challenge. Surrendering to this fact also keeps us from feeling sorry for others because we are reminded that everyone is dealt a different hand, and everyone has unique strengths and challenges. This insight has helped me to deal with the problems of raising two children, the difficult decisions I’ve had to make about who to help and who I can’t help, as well as with my own personal struggles during those times that I have felt victimized or unfairly treated. It almost always wakes me up to reality and puts me back on track.

The fact that life isn’t fair doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do everything in our power to improve our own lives or the world as a whole. To the contrary, it suggests that we should. When we don’t recognize or admit that life isn’t fair, we tend to feel pity for others and for ourselves. Pity, of course, is a self-defeating emotion that does nothing for anyone, except to make everyone feel worse than they already do. When we do recognize that life isn’t fair, however, we feel compassion for others and for ourselves. And compassion is a heartfelt emotion that delivers loving-kindness to everyone it touches. The next time you find yourself thinking about the injustices of the world, try reminding yourself of this very basic fact. You may be surprised that it can nudge you out of self-pity and into helpful action.
richard carlson

uncondtional love

Be the First One to Act Loving or Reach Out

So many of us hold on to little resentments that may have stemmed from an argument, a misunderstanding, the way we were raised, or some other painful event. Stubbornly, we wait for someone else to reach out to us -believing this is the only way we can forgive or rekindle a friendship or family relationship.
An acquaintance of mine, whose health isn’t very good, recently told me that she hasn’t spoken to her son in almost three years. “Why not?” I asked. She said that she and her son had had a disagreement about his wife and that she wouldn’t speak to him again unless he called first. When I suggested that she be the one to reach out, she resisted initially and said, “I can’t do that. He’s the one who should apologize.” She was literally willing to die before reaching out to her only son. After a little gentle encouragement, however, she did decide to be the first one to reach out. To her amazement, her son was grateful for her willingness to call and offered an apology of his own. As is usually the case when someone takes the chance and reaches out, everyone wins.

Whenever we hold on to our anger, we turn “small stuff” into really “big stuff” in our minds. We start to believe that our positions are more important than our happiness. They are not. If you want to be a more peaceful person you must understand that being right is almost never more important than allowing yourself to be happy. The way to be happy is to let go, and reach out. Let other people be right. This doesn’t mean that you’re wrong. Everything will be fine. You’ll experience the peace of letting go, as well as the joy of letting others be right. You’ll also notice that, as you reach out and let others be “right,” they will become less defensive and more loving toward you. They might even reach back. But, if for some reason they don’t, that’s okay too. You’ll have the inner satisfaction of knowing that you have done your part to create a more loving world, and certainly you’ll be more peaceful yourself.

soulmmate

He had been all that I always wanted to be, but never could be. He was all that I never wished to be, but could have been. best friend. worst enemy. who is He ? or is it  She?

Simple Hindu Prayers For Kids

Aadho Rama thapo vananu gamanam, Hathwa mrugam kanchanam, Vaidehi haranam, Jatayu maranam, Sugreeva sambhashanam, Bali nigrahanam, Samudhra tharanam, Lanka pureem dahanam, Paschad Ravana Kumbha karna madanam, Ethat ithi Ramayanam

Aadhou devaki devi garbha jananam, Gopi gruhe palanam, Mayaa poothana jeevithaa apaharanam, Govardhanodharanam, Kamsa chedana, Kouravadi hananam, Kunthi sutha palanam, Ethad bhagawatham purana kaditham sri Krishna leelamrutham

Aarthanaam aarthi hantharam, Bheethanam bheethi nasanam, Dwishatham kaladandam, tham Ramachandram namamyaham

Achyutham, Kesavam, Vishnum, Somam, Janardhanam,Hamsam, Krishnam,Narayanam, Jayethu Duswapna nasaye

Annapurne sadaapurne Shankara praana vallabheGnaana Vairaagya sidhyardham Bikshaamdehi chaParvati"

Anyadha saranam nasthi, Twameva Saranam mama, Tasmad karunya Bhavena, Raksha, raksha Maheswari

Anyatha sharanam nasti Twameva sharanam mama Tasmat karunya bhavena Raksha Raksha Maheswari Kaayena Vaacaa Manase[a-I]ndriyairvaa Buddhy[i]-Aatmanaa Vaa Prakrteh Svabhaavaat | Karomi Yad-Yat-Sakalam Parasmai Guru-Varaayeti Samarpayaami ||

Asatho Maa Sath Gamaya Thamaso Maa Jyothir Gamaya Mrithyor Maa Amritham Gamaya Om Shanti, Shani Shanti.

Aum shreem hreem kleem glaum gum ganapatayeVara-varadhasarva janam-mey vasamaanaya swaha

Bhano, bhaskara Marthanda, Chanda rasmai, divakara, Ayur, arogyam, budhim, sree yamscha dehi mae.

brahmaarpaNaM brahma haviH brahmaagnau brahmaNaa hutam.h . brahmaiva tena gantavyaM brahma karma samaadhinaa ..

Gangeycha Yamuneychaiva godhavari saraswathiNarmadey sindhuh kaveri Jalesmin sannidhim kuru

Govindethi sada snanam , Govindethi sada japam, Govindethi sada dhyanam , sada Govinda keerthanam.

Gurur brahma,Gurur Vishnu gurur devo Maheswara, Guru sakshad param brahma , tasmai sri gurave nama

kaayena vaachaa manasendriyairvaa buddhyaatmanaa vaa prakR^iteH svabhaavaat.h . karomi yad.hyad.h sakalaM parasmai naaraayaNaayeti samarpayaami

Karacharana Krn Itam Vaakkaayajam Karmajam Vaa,Shravananayanajam Vaa Maanasam Vaaparaadham,Vihitamavihitam Vaa Sarvametatkshamasva,Jaya Jaya Karunaabdhe Shriimahaadeva Shambho

Karagre Vasate Lakshmi, Karmadhye Saraswati Karmule tu Govind, Prabhate kardarshanam

Karagre vasathu Lakshmi, Karamadhye Saraswathi, Karamoole sthitha Gowri, Prabhate Kara Darshanam.

Kararavinde na padaravindam Mukharavinde viniveshayantam Vatasya patrasya pute shayanam Balam Mukundam manasa smarami

Karpoora Gauram Karunavataram Samsara Saram Bhujagendra Haram Sada Vasantam Hridayaravinde Bhavam Bhavani Sahitam Namami Mangalam Bhagavan Vishnum Mangalam Garudadhwajah Mangalam Pundareekaksham Mangalayatano Harih

Loka Veeram , Maha poojyam , Sarva raksha karam vibhum, Parvathy hrudayanandam, Sastharam Pranamamyaham

Manojavam marutha thulya vegam, Jithendriyam budhimatham varishtam, Vathathmajam vanara Dhootha mukyam, Sree rama dhootham sirasa namami

Namosthesthu Maha Maye, Sree peede, sura poojithe, Sanka , chakra, Gadha hasthe, Maha Lakshmi Namosthuthe

Om bhur bhuvah svaha Tat Savitur varenyam Bhargo devasya dhimahi Dhiyo yo nah prachodayat

Om mitraaya namah Om ravaye namah Om sooryaya namah Om bhaanave namah Om khagaaya namah Om pooshne namah Om hiraNya garbhaaya namah Om mareechaye namah Om aadityaaya namah Om savitre namah Om arkaaya namah Om bhaaskaraya namah Om sri savitra soorya narayaNaaya namah

Om Poornamadah Poornamidam Poornat Poornamudachyate Poornasya Poornamaadaya Poornameva vashishyate Om Shantih Shantih

Om Saha Nau-Avatu | Saha Nau Bhunaktu | Saha Viiryam Karava-Avahai | Tejas viNauA dhiiTamAstu Maa Vid vissAavahai | Om Shaantih Shaantih Shaantih

Om trayambakam yajaamahe sugandhim pushtivardhanam Urvaarukamiva bandhanaan mrityor muksheeya maamritaat

Om Trayambakam Yajamahe Sugandhim Pushtivardhanam Urvarukamiva Bandhanat Mrityormukshiya Mamritat

Samudravasane devi parvatstanmandaleVishnupatni namostubhyam padsparsham kshamaswa me Vishunupati samutpanne shankhavarna-mahitale Aanek-ratnasampanne bhumidevi namo namah

sarasvatii namastubhyaM varade kaamaruupiNi . vidyaarambhaM karishhyaami siddhirbhavatu me sadaa ..

Sarva Mangala Mangalye Shive Sarvartha Sadhike Sharanye Tryambake Gauri Narayani Namostute

shaa.ntaakaaraM bhujagashayanaM padmanaabhaM sureshaM . vishvaadhaaraM gaganasadR^ishaM meghavarNaM shubhaaN^gaM . lakshmiikaa.ntaM kamalanayanaM yogibhidhyaa.rnagamyaM . va.nde vishhNuM bhavabhayaharaM sarvalokaikanaatham

Shadananam Chandana lepithangam, Mahorasam Divya mayura vahanam, Rudrasya soonum Suraloka nadam, Brahmanya devam saranam prapadye.

Shivam shivakaram, shantham, shivathmanam, Shivothamam, Shivamarga pranetharam, pranamai sada shivam.

Shubham karothi kalyanam, aarogyam, dhana sampadam, Budhi vruddhi Shatru vinasaya, deepa jyothi namo nama.

shubhaM karoti kalyaaNaM aarogyaM dhanasaMpadaa . budhdi vrudhi shatru vinaashaaya diipajyoti namo.astute

tvameva maataa cha pitaa tvameva . tvameva bandhushcha sakhaa tvameva . tvameva vidyaa draviNaM tvameva . tvameva sarvaM mama devadeva ..

Twameva mata cha pita twameva Twameva bandhushcha sakha twameva Twameva vidya dravinam twameva Twameva sarvam mama deva deva

Vakra Thunda Maha Kaya, Koti Soorya Sama prabha, Nirvignam Kuru me Deva, sarva karyesshu sarvadha.

Vasu deva sutham devam Kamsa Chanura mardhanam, Devaki pramanandam Krishnam vande jagat gurum

yaa devii sarvabhuuteshhu maatR^irupeNa sa.nsthitaH . yaa devii sarvabhuuteshhu shaktirupeNa sa.nsthitaH . yaa devii sarvabhuuteshhu shaantirupeNa sa.nsthitaH . namastasyaiH namastasyaiH namastasyaiH namo namaH

yaa kundendu tushhaar haara dhavalaa yaa shubhravastraavR^itaa . yaa viiNaavarada.nDa ma.nDitakaraa yaa shvetapadmaasanaa . yaa brahmaachyutasha.nkaraprabhrutibhirdevai sadaa va.nditaa . saa maaM paatu sarasvatii bhagavatii niHsheshha jaaDyaa pahaa ..

101 Buddha Quotes

Your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as your own thoughts, unguarded. But once mastered, no one can help you as much. Not even your father or your mother.

Your work is to discover your work, and then with all your heart to give yourself to it.

Your body is precious. It is our vehicle for awakening. Treat it with care.

You will not be punished for your anger; you will be punished by your anger.

You will always be getting praise and blame, but do not let either affect the poise of the mind.

You should respect each other and refrain from disputes; you should not, like water and oil, repel each other, but should, like milk and water, mingle together.

You only lose what you cling to.

You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.

You are the source of all purity and impurity. No one purifies another.

Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world.

Wise men try to express their appreciation and gratitude by some return of kindness, not only to their benefactor, but to everyone else.

When one has the feeling of dislike for evil, when one feels tranquil, one finds pleasure in listening to good teachings; when one has these feelings and appreciates them, one is free of fear.

When it is impossible for anger to arise within you, you find no outside enemies anywhere.

Whatever words we utter should be chosen with care, for people will hear them and be influenced by them for good or ill.

What we think, we become. Be vigilant; guard your mind against negative thoughts.

What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: Our life is the creation of our mind.

We are what we think. With our thoughts, we make our world.

We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves.

We are formed and molded by our thoughts.

To keep the body in good health is a duty, otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear.

To forgive others is to be good to yourself.

To conquer oneself is a greater victory than to conquer thousands in a battle.

To be idle is a short road to death and to be diligent is a way of life; foolish people are idle, wise people are diligent.

To be angry is to let others’ mistakes punish yourself.

Through zeal, knowledge is gotten; through lack of zeal, knowledge is lost.

Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth.

Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened.

Those whose minds are shaped by selfless thoughts give joy when they speak or act. Joy follows them like a shadow that never leaves them.

There is pleasure, and there is bliss. Forgo the first to possess the second.

There is nothing so disobedient, as an undisciplined mind, and there is nothing so obedient, as a disciplined mind.

There is nothing more dreadful than the habit of doubt. Doubt separates people. It is a poison that disintegrates friendships and breaks up pleasant relations. It is a thorn that irritates and hurts; it is a sword that kills.

There is no fire like passion. No crime like hatred. No sorrow like separation. No sickness like hunger, and no joy like the joy of freedom.

There has to be evil so that good can prove its purity above it.

There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting.

The Way is not in the sky. The Way is in the heart.

The tongue like a sharp knife kills without drawing blood.

The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.

The ignorant man is an ox. He grows in size, not in wisdom.

The greatest prayer is patience.

The conquest of oneself is better than the conquest of all others.

Suppose an enemy has hurt you in his own domain, why should you annoy yourself and hurt your mind in your own domain?

Peace of Mind in Daily Life

Peace of Mind in Daily Life

Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.

Our sorrows and wounds are healed only when we touch them with compassion.

One thought leads to heaven, one thought leads to hell.

One is not low because of birth nor does birth make one holy. Deeds alone make one low, deeds alone make one holy.

On a long journey of human life, faith is the best of companions; it is the best refreshment on the journey; and it is the greatest property.

Nothing is permanent.

No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.

Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds.

Meditation brings wisdom; lack of mediation leaves ignorance. Know well what leads you forward and what hold you back, and choose the path that leads to wisdom.

Let yourself be open and life will be easier.

Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn’t learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn’t learn a little, at least we didn’t get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn’t die; so, let us all be thankful.

Let a man avoid evil deeds as a man who loves life avoids poison.

Learn to stay calm and poised in the midst of whatever is happening in your life, not taking anything too personally, or getting upset by what people say or do.

Learn how to strengthen your willpower and selfdiscipline, gain inner strength, and improve your selfconfidence, decisiveness and perseverance.

Learn how to quiet the constant chatter of your mind, and enjoy a state of inner peace in the various situations of your life.

Just as a candle cannot burn without fire, men cannot live without a spiritual life.

It is wrong to think that misfortunes come from the east or from the west; they originate within one’s own mind. Therefore, it is foolish to guard against misfortunes from the external world and leave the inner mind uncontrolled.

It is better to do nothing, than to do what is wrong. For whatever you do, you do to yourself.

It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours.

It is a man’s own mind, not his enemy or foe, that lures him to evil ways.

Inward calm cannot be maintained unless physical strength is constantly and intelligently replenished.

In the sky, there is no distinction of east and west; people create distinctions out of their own minds and then believe them to be true.

If you wish to be gentle with others, be gentle first with yourself.

If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change.

If a man’s mind becomes pure, his surroundings will also become pure.

I don’t wish to be everything to everyone, but I would like to be something to someone.

However many holy words you read, however many you speak, what good will they do you if you do not act on upon them.

How easy it is to see your brother’s faults. How hard it is to face your own.

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship.

He is able who thinks he is able.

Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule.

Happiness never decreases by being shared.

Happiness is a journey not a destination.

Happiness comes when your work and words are of benefit to yourself and others.

Good men and bad men differ radically. Bad men never appreciate kindness shown them, but wise men appreciate and are grateful.

Friendship is the only cure for hatred, the only guarantee of peace.

Fashion your life as a garland of beautiful deeds.

Everything is based on mind, is led by mind, is fashioned by mind. If you speak and act with a pure mind, happiness will follow you, as a shadow clings to a form.

Everything is based on mind, is led by mind, is fashioned by mind. If you speak and act with a polluted mind, suffering will follow you, as the wheels of the oxcart follow the footsteps of the ox.

Every human being is the author of his ow n health or disease.

Endurance is one of the most difficult disciplines, but it is to the one who endures that the final victory comes.

Emotional Detachment For a Better Life

Emotional Detachment For a Better Life

Easy to do are things that are bad and harmful to oneself. But exceedingly difficult to do are things that are good and beneficial.

Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most.

Do not overrate what you have received, nor envy others. He who envies others does not obtain peace of mind.

Do not dwell in the past, do not dwell in the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.

Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.

Do not believe in anything simply because you’ve heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many.

Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders.

But whatsoever, after due examination and analysis, you find to be kind, conducive to the good, the benefit, the welfare of all beings that doctrine believe and cling to, and take it as your guide.

Better than a thousand hollow words, is one word that brings peace.

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.

Believe nothing merely because you have been told it. Do not believe what your teacher tells you merely out of respect for the teacher.

Being deeply learned and skilled, being welltrained and using well-spoken words, this is good luck.

Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life.

Be a lamp unto yourself.

Anger will never disappear so long as thoughts of resentment are cherished in the mind.

Anger will disappear just as soon as thoughts of resentment are forgotten.

An outside enemy exists only if there is anger inside.

An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind.

An idea that is developed and put into action is more important than an idea that exists only as an idea.

All the information, advice, instructions and exercises you need for improving your concentration and focusing your mind.

All that we are is the result of what we have thought. If a man speaks or acts with an evil thought, pain follows him. If a man speaks or acts with a pure thought, happiness follows him, like a shadow that never leaves him.

All know the Way, but few actually walk it.

A spoon of salt in a glass of water makes the water undrinkable. A spoon of salt in a lake is almost unnoticed.

A man should first direct himself in the way he should go. Only then should he instruct others. Work out your own salvation. Do not depend on others.

A jug fills drop by drop.

A family is a place where minds come in contact with one another. If these minds love one another, the home will be as beautiful as a flower garden. But if these minds get out of harmony with one another it is like a storm that plays havoc with the garden.

A dog is not considered a good dog because he is a good barker. A man is not considered a good man because he is a good talker.

from http://www.SuccessConsciousness.com

by Compiled by Remez Sasson

In Asura, by Anand neelakantan., The great King Mahabali, advises Ravana to shun the nine base emotions of anger; pride; jealousy; happiness; sadness; fear; selfishness; passion and ambition. Intellect alone is to be revered.
Ravana responds :
“Your highness, these are noble thoughts, but what you are demanding is impossible. I am sorry to say this, but is the shedding of the nine emotions or nine thinking heads as you call them, which I need to shed for the sake of success, practical? I am a good student and I have learnt my lessons well but I shall always have my own opinion about things. Do not think that I am arrogant. Please hear me out.
You were talking about anger, your Highness. I agree, that misdirected anger can cause harm. But is it not a basic emotion of life? If I do not get angry at the plight of the Asura tribe, that once-mighty race which Sy rut built the greatest civilization the earth has known till now, how can I claim to be one of its worthy sons? Can’t I be furious when thousands live in inhuman conditions under the yoke of Deva kings and their vassal Asura fiends? If I cannot feel frustration about the forgotten Asura arts, demolished Asura religion, pulverized Asura temples, destroyed Asura kingdoms, and cowering cowards who drag themselves on all fours in front of Deva kings and petty nobles claiming to represent Asura interests, tell me sir, what emotion should I feel? Is it not anger that will electrify my thoughts and push me into positive action? I am sorry sir, but I will never lose this emotional head – the head of anger.
Why should pride and vanity be held in contempt? I feel proud about my people, our race, our culture, language art and music. I feel proud about myself for having immense energy and the will to succeed. I do not believe that a person should always be meek, beg for food or live in eternal poverty and all the stuff which Brahmins preach but not a single one ever practises.
If I struggle hard in my life to achieve success, I have every right to be proud of it, I have every right to bask in vanity and luxury. Why did the kings of the past build great temples and cities? Why did the nobles donate towards charity and religion? Is it not to exhibit their vanity and pride? Most humble men are either hypocrites or have much to be humble about. Success breeds pride and vanity. And pride is the only reward of success.
Jealousy is the biggest force that motivates humankind. Why do empires compete with each other? Why do kings try to outsmart each other in what they do, if not motivated by the jealousy they feel? Jealousy is the driving force of progress, envy is the motivating motivating force of life. The need for importance is the most important of urges after the basic physical urges of food, shelter and sex. Even these basic urges have their root in jealousy. To deny jealousy is to deny the basic instincts of man. Sorry sir, but what you are asking is impractical.
You talk about equanimity in sadness and happiness. Is this possible ever? When my beloved ones depart from this world, should I remain calm? Should I deny myself the consolation of crying? If I become incapable of feeling happiness, what shall become of me? If I do not find happiness in the beauty of the rising sun, if I cannot feel ecstasy in the smile of a little baby, if I cannot lose myself in the happiness of music, is life worth living? Fear is the greatest instinct of man and beast, and you ask me to ignore it. Sir, I am not afraid to say that I am scared. I am frightened of many things. I am no coward but fear sleeps somewhere in my heart. I am afraid of death and the people who claim they are not afraid of death. They are either foolish and will drag others down with them also, or they are evil men who hate everybody.
I am afraid of losing many things, worthless though they may be, but I would have gained them through my sweat and blood. I am afraid that my loved ones may fall prey to disease. I am afraid that some battles might claim my faithful brothers. Strong rain can wash away my sister and mother into the waiting ocean. I am aware with every breath I take that I take steps towards my death. But I do not fear fear so much as to deny its very existence. It is this fear that helps me remain prepared for dangers that I must face. It is fear that makes me understand that there are things that I cannot control and helps me to understand God and myself.
You call selfishness a base emotion. But it is this trait which has built great cities around the world and the very foundation of ambition. Without a highly centered ego and the desire to achieve the treasures of this world, would one succeed in life? When I see a lovely girl, a fascinating place, a charming village, a sparkling diamond, a prosperous S a fascina country, ambition flutters in my soul. I want the charms of this world to be mine and mine alone. You may try to kill my base thoughts, but my King, pardon my impudence impudence and tell me in all honesty, was it not from the same selfishness that you built an empire? You did not become a mendicant, but strived to become the Emperor of the whole world. If it was not for this base instinct of selfishness, why did you slay thousands in war? Why did you lead your mighty armies against the Devas? You had one aim only, you wanted glory for yourself, your clan, your tribe – whichever way one looks at it, the word you is prominent. I want to achieve whatever you achieved and much more. I am willing to risk being known as the most selfish man in the world, rather than dying unknown as a selfless non-entity.”
The old man sat there with fire in his eyes. I felt myself cowering. But, as I had started, I did not want to leave things unsaid. I collected my thoughts and pressed on, “It’s pity that you and Brahma look down on love as a base emotion. Without love, without the king of emotions, nothing exists. There’s nothing more pure than the love of a mother for her baby. If one has not felt the painful need to be with one’s lover, if you do not feel the love for your own brothers, sisters, your father who made you, your mother who carried you in her womb and raised you with her blood and milk, for friends and those little cherished moments of togetherness, your wife for sharing your life with you and for your children for carrying your life forward, then is this life worth living? Is it not love for your country, tribe, language, religion, Gods, and so many other things, which may seem trivial but which are so preciously held in the bosom of men, that has led to so much bloodshed and war? People have died for love in the past and will continue to do so as long as the world exists. I shall always love the things I have told you about. But yes, I shall love myself above them all. Without me, nothing which is lovable has any meaning to me. I love because I exist and I exist because I love – I love myself.
Ambition is the key to progress. Without ambition, the kings of Egypt would not be so busy building those pyramids right now. Without ambition, men would have remained hunters. There would not have been wheels, horsecarts or chariots, magnificent cities, temples and palaces, nor majestic sailing ships. Without ambition, we would not have had a Mahabali or Indra. Ambition is the horse that pulls our lives forward.
The amazing speed of progress man has achieved in the past few years would have not been achieved without that small flame of ambition in the minds of a few men, which was fanned to become a huge fire by the other emotions you have urged me to shun. Pride in one’s capability gave men the confidence and ambition to grow; jealousy that someone else would achieve more prodded him to work hard and more efficiently; the quest for happiness resulted in ever-expanding ambition; the fear of sadness kept him awake at night and pushed him further; the fear of failure made him more careful and God-fearing; selfishness glued his family, city, clan, tribe and country together and made him strive even harder. Love for life and the things which made life precious, made him protect his achievements. and I am sure an undying ambition for more will lead mankind to progress. Progress, which we cannot even imagine, can never understand in our short lifetime.
My beloved Emperor, please do not feel sorrow if I speak my heart. You were talking about intelligence being the only head worth having. I agree it is important. But history teaches us that without any of the other emotions, it is just an empty skeleton. There is no life in it. Sir, it was not the maharishis or sages who built civilizations but extraordinary men, who never controlled their emotions, b Sr eifeut let them flow in the direction which nature intended. No mendicant living in a forest ever conceived a great city, no sage was determined to built the great temples, no Brahmin desired to built great ships for commerce and trade. These were built by men who had pride in their veins, anger in their minds, who cried when they felt sad and laughed when they were happy, who were frightened when confronted by forces or events bigger than themselves, but strove forward with determination and a selfish love for all that they cherished. They constantly kept raising their levels of ambition. Intelligence is just a tool to serve our emotions and I want to live as God intended man to live.
My aim is neither become God nor achieve moksha. At best I think, those are old wives tales. I do not believe in a heaven where you will be given all that you purposefully denied yourself in this world. I do not believe in rebirth, when I will be born as a Brahmin if I do good deeds in this life – good in the way the Brahmins describe. If being born a Brahmin is the ultimate reward, then I may even refuse to die for fear of being reborn.
I am sad to disappoint you, but I shall live like a man and die as one. I will never try to be a God. I will live exactly as my emotions tell me to. I do not want to be a model man for future generations to follow. My life begins with me and ends with me. But I will live my life to its full and die as a man should. So borrowing from your words, I shall be a man with ten faces – I am Dasamukha.”

Simple Prayers of Vedic Traditions

Om Poornamadah Poornamidam Poornat Poornamudachyate

Poornasya
Poornamaadaya Poornameva vashishyate

Om Shantih Shantih

Om bhur bhuvah svaha Tat Savitur varenyam

Bhargo devasya dhimahi Dhiyo yo nah prachodayat

Om Saha Nau-Avatu | Saha Nau Bhunaktu | Saha Viiryam Karava-Avahai |

Tejas viNauA dhiiTamAstu Maa Vid vissAavahai | Om Shaantih Shaantih Shaantih

tvameva maataa cha pitaa tvameva . tvameva bandhushcha sakhaa tvameva .

tvameva vidyaa draviNaM tvameva . tvameva sarvaM mama devadeva ..

Karagre vasathu Lakshmi, Karamadhye Saraswathi,

Karamoole sthitha Gowri, Prabhate Kara Darshanam.

Govindethi sada snanam , Govindethi sada japam,

Govindethi sada dhyanam , sada Govinda keerthanam.

Gurur brahma,Gurur Vishnu gurur devo Maheswara,

Guru sakshad param brahma , tasmai sri gurave nama

Asatho Maa Sath Gamaya Thamaso Maa Jyothir Gamaya

Mrithyor Maa Amritham Gamaya Om Shanti, Shani Shanti.

Shubham karothi kalyanam, aarogyam, dhana sampadam,

Budhi vruddhi Shatru vinasaya, deepa jyothi namo nama.

Achyutham, Kesavam, Vishnum, Somam, Janardhanam,Hamsam,

Krishnam,Narayanam, Jayethu Duswapna nasaye

yaa kundendu tushhaar haara dhavalaa yaa shubhravastraavR^itaa .

yaa viiNaavarada.nDa ma.nDitakaraa yaa shvetapadmaasanaa .

yaa brahmaachyutasha.nkaraprabhrutibhirdevai sadaa va.nditaa .

saa maaM paatu sarasvatii bhagavatii niHsheshha jaaDyaa pahaa ..

sarasvatii namastubhyaM varade kaamaruupiNi .

vidyaarambhaM karishhyaami siddhirbhavatu me sadaa ..

Vakra Thunda Maha Kaya, Koti Soorya Sama prabha,

Nirvignam Kuru me Deva, sarva karyesshu sarvadha.

Shadananam Chandana lepithangam, Mahorasam Divya mayura vahanam,

Rudrasya soonum Suraloka nadam, Brahmanya devam saranam prapadye.

Loka Veeram , Maha poojyam , Sarva raksha karam vibhum,

Parvathy hrudayanandam, Sastharam Pranamamyaham

Bhano, bhaskara Marthanda, Chanda rasmai, divakara,

Ayur, arogyam, budhim, sree yamscha dehi mae.

Shivam shivakaram, shantham, shivathmanam, Shivothamam,

Shivamarga pranetharam, pranamai sada shivam.

Anyadha saranam nasthi, Twameva Saranam mama,

Tasmad karunya Bhavena, Raksha, raksha Maheswari

Namosthesthu Maha Maye, Sree peede, sura poojithe,

Sanka , chakra, Gadha hasthe, Maha Lakshmi Namosthuthe

Om trayambakam yajaamahe sugandhim pushtivardhanam

Urvaarukamiva bandhanaan mrityor muksheeya maamritaat

Manojavam marutha thulya vegam, Jithendriyam budhimatham varishtam,

Vathathmajam vanara Dhootha mukyam, Sree rama dhootham sirasa namami

Vasu deva sutham devam Kamsa Chanura mardhanam,

Devaki pramanandam Krishnam vande jagat gurum

Aarthanaam aarthi hantharam, Bheethanam bheethi nasanam,

Dwishatham kaladandam, tham Ramachandram namamyaham

brahmaarpaNaM brahma haviH brahmaagnau brahmaNaa hutam.h .

brahmaiva tena gantavyaM brahma karma samaadhinaa ..

shubhaM karoti kalyaaNaM aarogyaM dhanasaMpadaa .

budhdi vrudhi shatru vinaashaaya diipajyoti namo.astute

yaa devii sarvabhuuteshhu maatR^irupeNa sa.nsthitaH .

yaa devii sarvabhuuteshhu shaktirupeNa sa.nsthitaH .

yaa devii sarvabhuuteshhu shaantirupeNa sa.nsthitaH .

namastasyaiH namastasyaiH namastasyaiH namo namaH

kaayena vaachaa manasendriyairvaa

buddhyaatmanaa vaa prakR^iteH svabhaavaat.h .

karomi yad.hyad.h sakalaM parasmai

naaraayaNaayeti samarpayaami

shaa.ntaakaaraM bhujagashayanaM padmanaabhaM sureshaM .

vishvaadhaaraM gaganasadR^ishaM meghavarNaM shubhaaN^gaM .

lakshmiikaa.ntaM kamalanayanaM yogibhidhyaa.rnagamyaM .

va.nde vishhNuM bhavabhayaharaM sarvalokaikanaatham

Aadho Rama thapo vananu gamanam, Hathwa mrugam kanchanam,

Vaidehi haranam, Jatayu maranam, Sugreeva sambhashanam,

Bali nigrahanam, Samudhra tharanam, Lanka pureem dahanam,

Paschad Ravana Kumbha karna madanam, Ethat ithi Ramayanam

Aadhou devaki devi garbha jananam, Gopi gruhe palanam,

Mayaa poothana jeevithaa apaharanam, Govardhanodharanam, Kamsa chedana,

Kouravadi hananam, Kunthi sutha palanam, Ethad bhagawatham purana kaditham

sri Krishna leelamrutham

Om mitraaya namah Om ravaye namah

Om sooryaya namah Om bhaanave namah

Om khagaaya namah Om pooshne namah

Om hiraNya garbhaaya namah Om mareechaye namah

Om aadityaaya namah Om savitre namah

Om arkaaya namah Om bhaaskaraya namah

Om sri savitra soorya narayaNaaya namah

Om Trayambakam Yajamahe Sugandhim Pushtivardhanam
Urvarukamiva Bandhanat Mrityormukshiya Mamritat Om

Aum Bhoor Bhuwah Swaha Tat Savitur Varenyam
Bhargo Devasaya Dheemahi Dhiyo Yo Naha Prachodayat

Karpoora Gauram Karunavataram Samsara Saram Bhujagendra Haram
Sada Vasantam Hridayaravinde Bhavam Bhavani Sahitam Namami

Mangalam Bhagavan Vishnum Mangalam Garudadhwajah
Mangalam Pundareekaksham Mangalayatano Harih

Sarva Mangala Mangalye Shive Sarvartha Sadhike
Sharanye Tryambake Gauri Narayani Namostute

Twameva mata cha pita twameva Twameva bandhushcha sakha twameva
Twameva vidya dravinam twameva Twameva sarvam mama deva deva

Kararavinde na padaravindam Mukharavinde viniveshayantam
Vatasya patrasya pute shayanam Balam Mukundam manasa smarami

Anyatha sharanam nasti Twameva sharanam mama
Tasmat karunya bhavena Raksha Raksha Maheswari

Kaayena Vaacaa Manase[a-I]ndriyairvaa Buddhy[i]-Aatmanaa Vaa Prakrteh Svabhaavaat |
Karomi Yad-Yat-Sakalam Parasmai Guru-Varaayeti Samarpayaami ||

Karagre Vasate Lakshmi, Karmadhye SaraswatiKarmule tu Govind, Prabhate kardarshanam

Samudravasane devi parvatstanmandaleVishnupatni namostubhyam padsparsham kshamaswa me

Vishunupati samutpanne shankhavarna-mahitale Aanek-ratnasampanne bhumidevi namo namah

Gangeycha Yamuneychaiva godhavari saraswathiNarmadey sindhuh kaveri Jalesmin sannidhim kuru

Annapurne sadaapurne Shankara praana vallabheGnaana Vairaagya sidhyardham Bikshaamdehi chaParvati"

Karacharana Krn Itam Vaakkaayajam Karmajam Vaa,Shravananayanajam Vaa Maanasam Vaaparaadham,Vihitamavihitam Vaa Sarvametatkshamasva,Jaya Jaya Karunaabdhe Shriimahaadeva Shambho

Aum shreem hreem kleem glaum gum ganapatayeVara-varadhasarva janam-mey vasamaanaya swaha

ഓം ഭൂര്‍ ഭുവ സ്വാഹ തത സവിധുര്‍ വരരെന്യം ഭര്‍ഗോ ദേവസ്യ ധിമഹി ദി യോ യോ നഹ് പ്രശോ ടായത്

ഓം സഹന ആവതു സഹ നു ഭുനത് സഹ വീര്യം കര വാ വാഹി തേജസ് വിനാധി ടാമാസ്ടുയ് മാ വിധ വിശാവഹൈ ഓം ശാന്തി ശാന്തി ശന്തിഹി

തവ മി വാ മാതാ ച പിതാ ത്വമേവ , ത്വമേവ ബന്ധുസച്ച സഖ ത്വമേവ ത്വമേവ വിദ്യാ ദാവ്നം ത്വമേവ ത്വമേവ സര്‍വം മമ ദേവ ദേവാ

കരാഗ്രേ വസ്തു ലക്ഷ്മി കരമട്യെ സരസ്വതി കരര മൂലെ സ്തിദഹ് ഗൌരി പ്ര്ഭാതെ കര ദര്‍ശനം

ഗോവിന്ടെധി സാദാ സ്നാനം ഗോവിന്ടെധി സാദാ ജപം ഗോവിന്ടെധി സാദാ ദ്യനം സാദാ ഗോവിന്ദ കീര്‍ത്തനം

അച്യുതം കേസവം വിഷ്ണും സോമം ജനര്ധനം ഹംസം കൃഷ്ണം നാരായണം ജയത് ദുസ്വപ്ന നാസയെ

ഗുരുര്‍ ബ്രഹ്മ ഗുരുര്‍ വിഷ്ണു ഗുരുര്‍ ദേവോ മഹേശ്വര ഗുരു സക്ഷാറ്റ് പര ബ്രഹ്മ തസ്മൈ ശ്രീ ഗുരുവേ നമഹ

അസതോ മ സത് ഗമയ തമസൊ മ ജ്യൌടിര്‍ ഗമയ മൃത്യോര്‍ മ അമൃതം ഗമയ ഓം ശാന്തി ശാന്തി ശന്തിഹി

ശുഭം കരോധി കല്യാണം ആരോഗ്യം ധന സമപാദം ഭുധി വൃത്തി സംതൃ വിനസായ ദീപ ജ്യോതി നമോ നമഹ

യാ കുന്ടെണ്ടി തുഷാര ധാര ധവള യാ ശൂബ്ര വസ്ത്രാ വൃത്ത യാ വീണാ വര തണ്ട മണ്ടിധകരാ യാ ശ്വേത പത്മാസന യ ബ്രഹ്മ അച്യുത സങ്കര പ്രഭ്രുതിബിര്‍ ദേവേ സാദാ വന്ധിതാ സാ മാം പാദു സരസ്വതീ ഭഗവതീ നിഷേഷാ ജാട്യാ പഹാ

സരസ്വതി നമസ്തുഭ്യം വരധെ കാമരൂപിണി വിദ്യാആരംഭം കരിഷ്യാമി സിദ്ധിര്‍ ബഹ്വടു മി സദാ

വക്ര തുണ്ട മഹാ കായ സൂര്യ കോടി സമാഹ പ്രഹ്ബ നിര്വിഗ്നം കുരുമേ ദേവ സര്‍വ കാര്യേഷു സര്വത

ശടാനനം ചന്ദന ലെപിതാന്ഗം മഹോരസമ മയൂര വാഹനം രുദ്രസ്യ സൂനും സുരലോഗ നാദം ബ്രാഹ്മണ്യ ദേവം ശരണം പ്രപധ്യെ

ലോഗ വീര്യം മഹാ പൂജ്യം സര്‍വ രക്ഷ കാരണം വിഭും പാര്‍വതി ഹൃദയആനന്ദം സസ്താരം പ്രണാമം യഹാം

ഭാനോ ഭാസ്കര മര്തനട ചാണ്ട രസമായി ദിവാകര ആയുര്‍ ആരോഗ്യം ഭുടിം ശ്രീ യസ്മ്സ്ച്ച ദേഹി മേ

ശിവം സിവകാരം ശാന്തം സിവതമാനം സിവോതമം സിവമര്ഗ പ്രനെതരം പ്രനമായ് സദാ ശിവം\

അന്യഥാ ശരണം നാസ്തി ത്വമേവ ശരണം മമ തസ്മാദ് കാരുണ്യ ഭാവേന രക്ഷ രക്ഷ മഹേശ്വരീ

നമസ്തേസ്തു മഹാ മയെ ശ്രീ പീടെ സുര പൂജിധെ സങ്ക ചക്ര ഗഥ ഹസ്തേ മഹാ ലക്ഷ്മി നമോസ്തുധെ

ത്ര്യമബം യജാ മഹേ സുഗന്ധിം പുഷ്ടിവര്ധനം ഉര്വാര് കമിവ ബന്ധനത് മൃത്യോര്‍ മുക്ഷീയ മാംതൃടാത്

സരസ്വതി നമതുബ്യം വരടെ കമരുബിനി വിദ്യാരംഭം കരിഷ്യാമി സിധിര്‍ ഭവ തു മേ സദാ

മനോജവം മരുധി തുല്യ വേഗം ജിടെന്ദ്രിം ഭുദ്ധി മദം വരിഷ്ടം വധാത്മജം വാനര ധുത മുഖ്യം ശ്രീ രാമ ധുതം ശിരസ നമാമി

വാസുദേവ സുധം ദേവം കംസ ചനുര മര്‍ദനം ദേവകി പരമാനന്ദം കൃഷ്ണം വന്ദേ ജഗദ്‌ ഗുരും

കരോതി കല്യാണം ആരോഗ്യം ധനസംപടാ സംതൃ ഭുട്ടി വിനാസയാ ദീപജ്യോതി നമോസ്തുതേ

യാ ദേവി സര്‍വ ഭുതെശു മാതൃ രൂപേണ സംസ്ഥിധ യാ ദേവി സര്‍വ ഭുതെശു സക്തി രൂപേണ സംസ്ഥിധ

യാ ദേവി സര്‍വ ഭുതെശു ശാന്തി രൂപേണ സംസ്ഥിധ . നമസ്തസ്യൈ നമസ്തസ്യൈ നമസ്തസ്യൈ നമോ നമഹ്

കായേന വാശ മനസെന്ദ്രിയിര്വ ഭുട്യാത്മനാവാ പ്രക്രിത്യെ സ്വഭാവാത് കരോമി യട്സത് സകലം പരസ്മൈ നാരായനായെത്തി സമര്പയമാമി

ശാന്റാകരാമ ഭുജഗശയനം പദ്മനാബം സുരേശം വിശ്വാധാരം ഗണന സാദൃശ്യം മേഘവര്നം ശുഭാംഗം ലക്ഷ്മീകന്ധം കമലനയനം യോഗിഭിട്യാനഗംയം വന്ദേ വിഷ്ണുമ ഭാവഭായഗരം സര്വലോഗിഗനധം

http://greenmesg.org/mantras_slokas.php#Vedas

This is an attempt to collect some of the Great Sayings in our Vedas. All readers are welcome to contribute to this effort. You can suggest any correction as well.

1. “Avichara- krito Bandhah, Vicharena Nivartate”- All bondage is due to either total lack of thinking, incomplete thinking or wrong thinking. It can be removed by right and complete thinking. (Tatva Bodham).

2. “Tat Doore, Tat-u-Antike” – It is distant and it is near. This alone can be the definition of the All-Pervading Atman. (Isavasya Upanishad-5). India is not only here, not in Delhi or Kolkata alone; it is there in Cape Comorin and in Mumbai also. The State called India is all-pervading, as far as the frontiers of this Country define it. Similarly, the Pure Consciousness, the Supreme reality, being all-pervading, it is at once near and the most distant.

3. “Sishya Papam, Gurum Vrajet” – For all the sins created by his students, the Guru is morally responsible . (Neethi Sastram).

4. “Yogah, Chitta Vrithi Nirodhah”- Yoga is the control of thought waves in the mind. (Patanjali).

5. “Dharmo Rakshati Rakshita” – Dharma will protect the one who protects Dharma. (Artha Sastram).

6. “Satyam Bhootahitam Priyam” – What is good and likable for all beings, by thoughts, speeches and actions, is Satyam(Truth). (Periyaval)

7. “Yadhe Chhasi Tadha Kuru” – Act as you choose. This is what Lord Krishna says to Arjuna at the end of His Gita Upadesam. (Gita: 18-63).

8. ” Raja Rashtra Kritam Papam ” – All the sins created by the people of the State will go to the Raja “. (Neethi Sastram).

9. “Muhurtham Jwalitham Shreyo natu Dhumayitam Chiram” – It is better to flame forth for one instant than to smoke away for ages. The context is- it is better to have such brilliant men like Vivekananda who lived for only 39 years and Adi sankara who lived for only 32 years.

10. “Shrutim Pashyanti Munayah” – The Rishis just saw the Vedas. They have not created them.

11. “Nishekati Shmashanantam” – From the womb to the tomb, a man has to undergo performance of 40 Samskaras. The first one ‘Nishekam’ and the last one ‘Cremation’ both are done with Agni as witness.

12. “Ksheene Punye Martyalokam Vishanti” – On the exhaustion of your ‘Punyams’, you will be pushed back to Earth. This is the limitation of Karma Marg.

13. “Gayatrim Chhandasam Mata” – Chhandas means Vedam. Gayatri is the mother of all Veda Mantras.

14. “Yogasya Prathama Dvaram Vak-nirodha” – The main entrance to the Yoga Empire is through ‘Silence’.

15. “Trividham Narakasyetam Dvaram Nashanam Atmana” – There are 3 gates which lead to the hell called ‘Atma Nasham’ – They are Kama, Krodha and Lobha (Lust, anger and greed).

16. “Athatho Dharma Jijnasah” – Let us therefore start the enquiry of Dharma.The Poorva Mimamsa (Karma Kanda) starts with this ‘Sutra’.

17. “Athatho Brahma Jijnasah” – Let us therefore inquire into the Brahman.The Uttara Mimamsa (Jnana Kanda) starts with this ‘Sutra’.

18. “Aho Niranjan” – O!, I am taintless, Serene- The Mavellous Self. This is how King Janaka expressed his “Joy of Realisation” on hearing the teachings of Sage Ashtavakra. You can tell this to yourself everyday morning, as soon as you wake up, just to boost up your own morale. It serves as ‘Inspiration’ whenever one undergoes depression.

19. “Shraddha-Bhakti-Dhyana-Yogad Avaihi “ – Through Faith, Devotion and Meditation alone, you can know the Truth yourself. (Kaivalya Upanishad-Mantra 2 ).

20. “Me Nasti Kinchana, Athava Me Sarvam” – In fact, one way, nothing belongs to me; or in another way, everything is mine only. This is said by King Janaka in Ashtavakra Gita.

21. “Katham Jnanam Avapnoti” – Teach me this, O Lord, how can knowledge be acquired ?. The famous ‘Ashtavakra Gita’ starts with this Shloka. King Janaka is requesting Sage Ashtavakra.

22. “Ananda-param-anandah, Sah Bodhah Tvam Sukham Chara” – You are that Supreme – Consciousness- Bliss. With this in mind, live happily. This is what Ashtavakra tells Janaka.

23. “Mana eva Manushyanam Karanam Bandha-mokshayoh” – Mind alone is the cause for the state of Bondage or Liberation in man. It is upto us to use this mind for our liberation, by properly controlling it. (Upanishads).

24. “Brahmaveda Brahmaiva Bhavati” – The knower of the Brahman becomes Brahman. (Mundaka Upanishad).

25. “Bhavana Tanavam Moksha, Bandho hi Dridda Bhavana” – Thought- reduction is freedom; Thought-assertion is Bondage. The seeker must learn to rise above his desire-promptings. There is no other escape. (Yoga Vasishta).

26. “Jnana-Hino Gurus Tyajyo” – Reject an incompetent and an ignorant Guru. Apart from knowledege, the essential qualification for a teacher is his own inner awakening, accomplished by the 3 means- of indifference, of equanimity and of logical reasoning. (Guru Gita). According to Ashtavakra, “Brahma nishtatvam”- the direct experience of the Self- is the most valid qualification for a teacher.

27. “Sukshmatvat-tad-Vijneyam” – Because of its subtlity, it (the Infinite Self) is ever incomprehensive. (Gita: 13-15)

28. “Nanavaptam-avaptavyam Varta eva cha Karmani” – Nor is there anything unattained by Me; yet, I engage Myself in action. (Lord Krishna in Gita:3-22). The Man of realisation has nothing to gain for Himself by undertaking an activity; nor, has He to lose anything by not doing. Yet, He is seen to be constantly engaged in various programmes of service.

29. “Dritiyat- vai Bhayam Bhavati” – The perception of the other is, indeed, the source of all fear. (Brahadaranyaka Upanishad)

30. “Samatvam Yoga Uchyate” – Evenness of mind is yoga. Equanimity within is spiritual life. (Gita: 2-48).

31. ” Yogah Karmasu Kausalam “ – Yoga is the dexterity in action. ie. Efficiency and dexterity in action is spiritual life. (Gita: 2-50)

32. “Yadrichha Labha Santushta” – He enjoys that “whatever comes to him unasked” (Gita:4-22). The wise one sits happily, sleeps happily, moves happily, speaks happily and eats happily.

33. “Sarva-arambha Parityagi, Gunatitah sa Uchyate” – Abandoning all undertakings, he is said to have crossed beyond the gunas. (Gita:14-25). The Man of Perfection has no vanity of ‘doership’.

34. “Atrana-atmanyaham iti Matir-bandhah” – To identify the Self with the ‘not-self’ – this is bondage of man. (Vivekachudamani: V-139)

35. “Kasminnu Bhagavo Vijnate, Sarvam Idam Vijnatam Bhavatiti” – Sire, what is that knowledge by knowing which all other knowledges become known. (Mundaka upanishad). The Self is “Knowledge of all knowledges”.

36. “Kshurasya Dhara Nishita Duratyaya Durgam Pathas-tat-kavayo Vadanti” – Like the sharp edge of a razor is that path difficult to cross and hard to tread-thus say the wise. (Katopanishad)

37. “Yato Vacho Nivartante, Aprapya Manasa Saha” – The Realm of Reality is there from where the mind along with speech returns disappointed. (Taittiriya Upanishad).

38. “Purnasya Purnam-adaya Purnam Evava Sishyate” – From the Whole, when the whole is negated, what remains is again the Whole. (Upanishadic Shanti Patha).

39. “Pasyamu-achakshuh sa Shrunomy-akarnah” – I see without eyes; hear without ears. (Kaivalya Upanishad, Mantra-21). The Wise-man, in his Self-Realisation, has ended completely his sense of doership and enjoyership.

40. “Na-abhinandati na Dveshti, Tasya Prajna Pratisthita” – Who neither rejoices nor hates, his wisdom is firm. (Gita: 2-57).

41. “Lokan- nodvijate cha yah” – And who cannot be agitated by the world. (Gita:12-15).

42. “Nirdosham hi Samam Brahma” – The Supreme is the flawless state, the same everywhere. (Gita: 5-19)

43. “Yat Chittam Tanmayo Bhavati Purushah” – Whatever springs in mind, man expresses it. (Yoga -Vasishta).

44. “Atmano Mokshartam, Jagat hitayacha” – For the salvation of one’s soul and the welfare of the world. (Vivekananda)

45. “Ekam Sat, Vipra Bahudha Vadanti” – The Truth is one, the wise call it by many names. (Upanishads)

46. “Sarve Santu Sukhina, Sarve Santu Niramaya” – May all beings be happy, may all beings be free from fear.

47. “Nama Sivaya cha Sivataraya cha” – Salutations unto Siva- the auspicious one; unto Sivatara – the one than whom none more auspicious can exist. (Sree Rudram).

48. “Sakaram-anurtam Viddhi, Nirakaram tu Nischalam” – All which have form are false; the formless is the changeless. (Ashtavakra Gita). The world of names and forms is only the imagination(Vikalpana) of the total-mind. It has no existence whasoever. The Self is Undisturbed, Profoundly Peaceful and ever -Formless.

49. “Tathatma – jnana-hinatma Kalo Jnasya na Labhyate” – Thus to the Man-of -Wisdom, there is no time when He is not aware of the Self-in-Him.(Yoga-Vasishta).

50. “Na Tvaham, Teshu te Mayi” – I am not in them; they are in Me. (Krishna says in Gita: 9-4)

.

Nahi Jnanena Sadrsham
Nothing is equivalent to knowledge

Vasudaiva Kutumbakam
The whole earth is a family

Satyameva Jayate
Truth always triumphs

Dharmo Rakshathi Rakshithaha
He who carries out his duties shall be protected

Sarvejana Sukhinobhavanthu
May all the people in this universe live with happiness and prosperity

Janma Jaata Shudra Sarve
Karmenu Brahman Bhavati
All humans are inferior (Shudra) by birth and they become superior (Brahmins) only by their good deeds later in their life.

Asatho Ma Sathgamaya,
Thamaso Ma Jyothirgamaya
Mruthyorma Amrthangamya

Lead me towards truth from untruth
Lead me towards light from darkness
Lead me towards immortality from Death

Yatra Naaryasthu poojyanthe
Ramanethe thatra devathaha

Where women are treated with dignity and Womanhood is worshipped, there Roam the GODS

Ekam Sat Vipraha bahudha vadanti
There is but one God, learned scholars call this God by different names

Isha vasya midam sarvam
The entire universe is pervaded by God

Sarve amritasya putrah
We are all the children of God

Ati Vinayam Dhoortha Lakshanam
Too much of humbleness is an attribute of a wicked person

Aham Brahmasmi
I am God (indicating God lives inside humans)

Lobhaha Papasya Karanam
Greed is the root cause of sin

Matru Devo Bhava Pitru Devo Bhava
Acharya Devo Bhava Athithi Devo Bhava
Treat your Mother, Father, Teacher and Guest like a God

Satyam bruyat priyam bruyat na bruyat satyam apriyam
priyam cha nanrutam bruyat esha dharmah sanatanah
Only speak the truth that is pleasant to others
Do no speak the truth that might be unpleasant to others
Never speak untruth that is pleasant to others
This is the path of the eternal morality called Sanatana Dharma

Annam na nindhyath
Annam na pari-chaksheeta
Annam bahu kurveeta
Do not abuse food
Do not discard food
Grow food in abundance!

shubham karoti kalyaaNam aarogyam dhanasampadaa
shatrubuddhi vinaashaaya deepajyoti namostute
I salute the light from the lamp, the one that brings auspiciousness, prosperity, good health, abundance of wealth, and the destruction of the intellect’s enemy!
(said while lighting the evening lamp)

Kaalaaya Tasmai Namaha
Salutations to that great entity called TIME

Satyam Vadha Dharmam Chara
Speak the truth, follow the righteous path

Aa no bhadrah kratavo yantu vishwatah
May auspicious thoughts come to us from all over the world.

Mata Bhumih putro ham prithvyah
Earth is our mother and we are its children.

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Naarada Bhakti Suthra – The Path of Devotion

Posted by laxminarayanp on October 30, 2007

Possibly this is greatest book defining what is Bhakthi written by Narada who was the

greatest among Bhakthas of Lord Narayana.

1.Atha tho Bakthim vyakyasyama

Now I will explain in detail what is meant by devotion to God(Bhakthi).

2.Saa tasmin Parama prema roopa

Devotion to God is personification of intense(highest) love towards Him.

3.Amrutha swaroopa cha

It also is deathless or as sweet as nectar (or it also confers deathlessness to one)

4.Yallabhathva puman siddho bhavathi, amrutho bhavathi, truptho bhavathi

One who gets it becomes perfect, immortal and contended.

5.Yath prapya kinchid vanchadhi , na sochathi, na dweshati, na ramathe na uthsahi havathi

One who gets it desires not, worries not, hates not , enjoys not, and does not

get excited.

6.Yat gnathwa matho bhavathi, sthabhdho bhavathi, athmaramo bhavathi.

One who attains it becomes intoxicated (be in stupor), still and drunk with self(soul)

7.Saa na kamaya mana , nirodha roopathwad

It is not desire generating as it is by nature a form of renunciation.

8.Nirodasthu loka veda vyapara nyasa

Giving away the social and Vedic customs including religious activities is termed as a form of this renunciation.

9.Tasmin ananyatha that, virodhi shoothaaseena tha cha.

To be one with Him and complete indifference in things which are contrary to him is termed as a form of renunciation.

10.Anyasrayanaan tyage ananyatha.

To sacrifice dependence on any thing but Him is exclusiveness(that which does not have any other thing but Him)

11.Loke vedeshu thatha anukoolasaranam that, virodhi shoothassenatha.

In ordinary life and in Vedic percepts, to do that which is beneficial to Him is exclusiveness(that which does not have any other thing but Him)

12.Bhavathu nischaya dartyathurthvam sasthra rakshanam.

After attaining this state rock stable firmness in Vedic injunctions follow,

13.Anyadha padithya sankhaya

If you do not do this , there is a doubt of a possibility of degradation.

14.Lokopi thava deva kinthu bhojanani vyaparasthva sareera daranavathi

Obey the ways of the world till you attain renunciation, do activities like eating which should continue till the body exists.

15.Tal lakshanathi vachyanthe nana madha bedanath.

The differing definitions of Bhakthi (:devotion”) as viewed by many are listed.

16.Poojadhishwa anuraga ithi Parasara rya.

Intense desire to Worship Him with loving affection , is “devotion” according to Sage Parasara.

17.Kadhadhi shweethi Garga

Intense desire to hear his stories is “devotion” according to Sage Garga.

18.Athma rathya virodhe nethi Sandilya

“Devotion” should be done without conflict to the happiness of the soul,according to sage Sandilya.

19.Naradasthu thadarpithagi, lacharatha that, vismarane parama vyakulathethi.

But according to sage Narada, “devotion” is doing all duties on behalf of Him,and become extremely sad even if you happen to forget Him for a second.

20.Asthy evam evam

This “devotion” is like each of the above views.

21.Yada vraja gopikanam.

This can be best illustrated by the “devotion” of the Gopis of Gokula.

22.Thathrapi tha mahatmyam jnana vismruthya bhavaatha.

In this case at no stage His greatness is ever forgotten.

23.Thad viheenam Jaranam iva

For any “devotion” forgetting His greatness is like an illicit love affair.

24.Nasthyeva tasmin that sukha sukhi twam.

All actions done as a result of this “devotion”(love) is to offer and enhance His pleasure or All actions of this “devotion” are meant for pleasing Him only.

25.Saa thu karma jnana yogebhyo apyadhigathara.

This “devotion” is far greater than the path of action (karma), the path of knowledge (gyana), and the path of disciplined contemplation (yoga).

26.Phala roopathwad.

Because this “devotion” is like the fruit attained by any of these methods..

27.Iswarasyapyabhi mana dweshitwath dainya priyathwacha

Because God also does not like pride and likes humility, “devotion” as a method is better than Karma yoga and Gnana yoga

28.Tasya gnana meva Sadana mithyeke

Some believe that knowledge alone is the path of attainment.

29.Anyonyasryathwa mithyanye

Some others believe that Knowledge and devotion are interdependent on each other

30.Swayam phala roopathethi Brahma kumara

The son of Brahma (sage Narada) believes that “devotion” is its own result

31.Rajagruha Bhojanaadhishu tadaiva drushtatwad

It is just like glancing at a palace or being informed of sumptuous food .

32. Naa thena Raja paridosha kshudha shanthirva

Glancing at the palace does not make the king happy nor hearing of sumptuous food remove his hunger Similarly knowing about “devotion”, does not help you at all. You should have “devotion”.

33. Tasmad saiva grahya mumukshubhi

So all those who want to get out of the chain of births and rebirths should only practice “devotion”

34.Tasya sadhanani gayanthy acharya

The learned ones therefore sing about the results of “devotion”

35.Thathu Vishaya tyagath, Sanga thyagath chcha

This “devotion “ reaches completion only when sacrifice is made of pleasurable things and mundane social contacts.

36.Avyavruthabha janath

It reaches completion by forever ceaseless chanting

37.Lokebhi Bhagawath guna sravana keerthanad

It also reaches completion by hearing always or singing about the qualities of God.

38.Mukhythasthu Mahad krapayaiva Bhagawat krupa leasad Vaa

But most importantly it reaches completion only by the grace of Great learned people and by the divine grace.

39. Mahad sangasthu durlabhe , agamyo amogascha

The company or the grace of great learned people is difficult to get and is not easily attained and never goes waste.

40.Labhyadhobhi that krupayaiva

The company of great learned people is got only through the grace of God.

41.Tasmim thajjane bhedha bhavath

There is no difference whatsoever between God and his people(devotees)

42.Thadeva sadyatham Thadeva sadyatham

So search for the company of great learned people, for that can be accomplished by that method only.

43.Dussanga sarvathaiva thyajya

Also forever avoid the company of bad people.

44.Kama , Krodha, moha , smrithibramsa , buddhi nasa, sarva nasa karanathwaad.

Because such a company(of bad people) leads to passion, anger, dullness,memory loss, loss of wisdom and thus leads to utter ruin.

45. Tharangayidha abhi me sangath samudrayanthi

These (passion, anger etc) though they initially appear in bad company as small waves gather momentum and become like sea.

46.Kastharathi kastharathi Mayam? Ya, sangam sthyajathi yo mahanubhavam sevathe ,nirmalo bhavathi.

Who can cross? Who can cross the veil of illusion?He who is devoid of any worldly attachment serves wise people and does not have a feeling of “mine” can only cross the veil of illusion.

47.Yo viviktha sthanam sevathe, Yo loka bandham unmolayathi, nistraigunyo bhavathi,yoga kshemam tyajathi.

He who lives in a holy place in seclusion, he who cuts of the fetters of worldly attachment, he who goes beyond all characterizations and he who forsakes pleasure as well as yoga only can only cross the veil of illusion.

[Seclusion — in seclusion from bad association. Renounces requirements and comfort –becomes utterly dependent on the Lord for everything, not aspiring for them independently )

48.Ya karma phalam tyajathi, karmani sanyasyathi, thado nirdwando bhavathi.

He who sacrifices the result of actions, He who detaches himself from actions and he who sacrifices the two opposites like heat-cold, pleasure-suffering, recognition-insult etc. can only cross the veil of illusion..

49.Vedanabhi sannyasyathi, kevalam vichinna anuragam labhade

He who forsakes even Vedas and reaches the limitless love of “devotion” can only cross the veil of illusion.

50.Sa tharathi, sa tharathi sa lokaam stharayathi

He crosses, He only crosses, and he helps other people also to cross.. the veil of Maya.

51.Anirvachaneeyam prema swaroopam

This extreme love of “devotion” is indefinable

52. Mooka swadanavath

It is (extreme love) like a dumb one tasting , for he does not tell what he feels.

53.Prakasathe kwapi pathre.

Extremely rarely some people are able to explain what they feel.

54.Guna rahitham, kamanaa rahitham, prathi kshana vardhamana, avichinnam,sookshma tharam, anubhava roopam.

This love of “devotion” is without any properties, without any desire, increases every second, micro of micros and it can be described only by really experiencing it.

55. Thad prapya thadevaavalokayathi, thadeva srunothi, thadeva bhashayathi, thadeva chinthayadhi.

One who possesses this love of “devotion”, is able to only see Him everywhere, is able to only hear of Him always, is able to only talk about Him always and always thinks about Him .

56.Gowni thridha guna bheda arthadhi bhedathwa.

The “devotion” is of three types depending on the type of people viz.Sathwa(pure hearted), Rajasa(warrior in outlook) and Tamasa(debased)

57.Utharasmathu , utharasmath poorva, poorvaasrayeya bhavathi.

Each of the above three categories are better than that coming next , in otherwords, Sathvika Bhakthi is better than Rajasic which is better than thamasic,

58.Anyasmath saulabhyam bhakthou

This path of “devotion” is the easiest among the paths to attain God.

59.Pramana antharsyam apekshatwath swayam pramanathwath.

This path of “devotion” is its own proof and does not need any other proof.

60.Santhi roopaath, paramananda roopascha

It is personification of peace and ultimate happiness.

61.Lokhanau chintha na karya nivedhi, tha athma loka vedatwad.

One who practices “devotion” should not get worried about worldly affairs, for he has given away all his actions to God.

62.Na thada siddhou , loka vivahoro heya , kinthu phala thyagas that sadanam karya meva

Upon attaining the goal, a devotee should not keep away from worldly actions but perform them without bothering about the result.

63. Sthreethana nasthika vairi charithram na sravaneeyam

Do not hear stories, gossip or news about women, atheist and enemies.

64.Abhimana Dambadhikam tyagyam

Sacrifice egoism and self praise

65.Thadrpidago laachara san kala krodhabhi manadhikam tasminneva karaneeyam

If after offering all actions to god, if feelings of anger, pride and passion come again, they also should be offered to Him.

66.Tri roopa bhanga poorvakam nithya dasa, nithya kanthapa janathmakam va premaiva karyam, premaiva karyam,

Breaking the three distinctions pointed out, one should always serve Him like a servant or wife with unblemished love and definitely with unblemished love.

67.Bhaktha ekandino mukhya

Those devotes only are great who keep Him as their one and only one aim.

68.Kantavarodha romanchasrubhi parasparam labhamana , bhavayanthi kulani prithweem.

These devotees with tear filled eyes, with stuttering voice, and hair standing out discuss always about Him and are a gift to the their clan and to the world.

69.Theerthi kurvanthi, theerthani sukarmi kuvanthi, karmani sachasthri kurvanthi

These devotees make sacred waters more sacred , actions into good actions and holy scriptures more holy.

70.Than maya

For they are filled with God.

71.Modanthe pitharo ,nruthyanthi devatha sanadha cheyam bhoorbhavathi.

Because of them the manes rejoice, gods dance and world gets a good leader

72.Nasthi theshu jathi vidhya roopa kula dhana kriyadhi bedha

Within them there is no difference by caste, by knowledge, by looks, by birth,by wealth or by actions.

73.Yadasthadeeya

For all of them are His.

74.Vadho naa avalambham

These devotees should not enter into arguments.

75.Bahulya avakasada niyathathwacha

With differing opinions expressed nothing can be concluded in these arguments

76.Bhakthi sasthrani mananeeyani thadudbodha sukarmanyapi karaneeyani.

They should always read or hear about “devotion” and they should engage themselves in acts to increase such “devotion”.

77.Sukha dukhe icha labhadhi tyakthe kale, pratheekshyamane kshanartham api vyardhanam na neyam.

They should await the time when happiness, sorrow, desire and profit can be completely forsaken, and keep on thinking about him every second with love.

78.Ahimsa Sathya sowcha, daya asthhikyadhi charithryani parpalaneeyani

They should observe strictly non-violence, truth. Cleanliness, compassion and faith.

79.Sarvada sarve bhavena nischindhidair bhagawaneva bhajaneeya

Always and under all circumstances. Without diverting their mind to other thoughts, they should pray God.

80.Sa keerthayamana seegram eva avirbhavathi anubhavayathi cha bhakthan.

Being sung in such a way by the devotees, He appears before them and makes them realize.

81.Trisathyasya bhakthireva gareeyasi , bhakthireva gareeyasi.

To the one who is truthful to Him in mind, body and words Devotion is the greatest path , It is the greatest.

82.Guna mahathmyasakthi. Roopasakthi, poojasakthi, smaranasakthi, dasyasakthi.,sakhyasakthi, kanthasakthi, vatsalya sakthya athma nivedanasakthithanmayadhasakthi,paramavirahasakthi, roopa ekathabhya ekatha satha bhavathi.

Though “devotion” is one quality it is expressed in eleven different ways depending on the individual soul viz 1.longing to hear about His greatness, 2, Longing to see His great form, 3.Longing to worship Him always 4. Longing to always remember Him 5. Longing to forever serve Him as a slave 6. Longing to be His most intimate friend 7. Longing to be his consort 8.Longing to be affectionate to Him like a parent. 9.Longing to sacrifice our soul to Him. 10. Longing to become Himself and 11, Suffering his absence even for a second like a lover.

83.Ithyevam vadanthi jana jalpa nirbhaya eka matha , kumara Vyasa, shukha, Sandilya,Garga, Vishnu, Koundinya, Sesho uddhavarunee bhali, hanumath vibeeshanadha yo Bhakthacharya

Very great devotees like Vyasa, Shukha, Sandilya, , Garga, Vishnu, Koundinya,Sesha, Udhawa, aaruni, Bali , Hanuman and Vibeeshana tell in unanimity without bothering about different opinions expressed that the path of “devotion” is the greatest.

84.Idham Narada proktham Shiva anusasanam Viswaseethi sradhathe sa preshtam labhadha ithi.

One who with utmost faith and belief understands the above exposition of Narada would attain God, would definitely attain God.

OM THAT SATH

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Ashtavakra Gita

Posted by laxminarayanp on October 22, 2007

Ashtavakra Gita – “the most unique conversation that has taken place on this planet”. The Ashtavakra Gita documents the unveiling of the highest knowledge from a saint to a wise king many thousands of years ago.

I

Janaka said:

1. How is one to acquire knowledge? How is one to attain liberation? And how is one to reach dispassion? Tell me this, sir.

Ashtavakra said:

2. If you are seeking liberation, my son, avoid the objects of the senses like poison and cultivate tolerance, sincerity, compassion, contentment, and truthfulness as the antidote.

3. You do not consist of any of the elements — earth, water, fire, air, or even ether. To be liberated, know yourself as consisting of consciousness, the witness of these.

4. If only you will remain resting in consciousness, seeing yourself as distinct from the body, then even now you will become happy, peaceful and free from bonds.

5. You do not belong to the brahmin or any other caste, you are not at any stage, nor are you anything that the eye can see. You are unattached and formless, the witness of everything — so be happy.

6. Righteousness and unrighteousness, pleasure and pain are purely of the mind and are no concern of yours. You are neither the doer nor the reaper of the consequences, so you are always free.

7. You are the one witness of everything and are always completely free. The cause of your bondage is that you see the witness as something other than this.

8. Since you have been bitten by the black snake, the opinion about yourself that “I am the doer,” drink the antidote of faith in the fact that “I am not the doer,” and be happy.

9. Burn down the forest of ignorance with the fire of the understanding that “I am the one pure awareness,” and be happy and free from distress.

10. That in which all this appears is imagined like the snake in a rope; that joy, supreme joy, and awareness is what you are, so be happy.

11. If one thinks of oneself as free, one is free, and if one thinks of oneself as bound, one is bound. Here this saying is true, “Thinking makes it so.”

12. Your real nature is as the one perfect, free, and actionless consciousness, the all-pervading witness — unattached to anything, desireless and at peace. It is from illusion that you seem to be involved in samsara.

13. Meditate on yourself as motionless awareness, free from any dualism, giving up the mistaken idea that you are just a derivative consciousness or anything external or internal.

14. You have long been trapped in the snare of identification with the body. Sever it with the knife of knowledge that “I am awareness,” and be happy, my son.

15. You are really unbound and actionless, self-illuminating and spotless already. The cause of your bondage is that you are still resorting to stilling the mind.

16. All of this is really filled by you and strung out in you, for what you consist of is pure awareness — so don’t be small-minded.

17. You are unconditioned and changeless, formless and immovable, unfathomable awareness, unperturbable: so hold to nothing but consciousness.

18. Recognise that the apparent is unreal, while the unmanifest is abiding. Through this initiation into truth you will escape falling into unreality again.

19. Just as a mirror exists everywhere both within and apart from its reflected images, so the Supreme Lord exists everywhere within and apart from this body.

20. Just as one and the same all-pervading space exists within and without a jar, so the eternal, everlasting God exists in the totality of things.

II

Janaka said:

1. Truly I am spotless and at peace, the awareness beyond natural causality. All this time I have been afflicted by delusion.

2. As I alone give light to this body, so I do to the world. As a result the whole world is mine, or alternatively nothing is.

3. So now that I have abandoned the body and everything else, by good fortune my true self becomes apparent.

4. Waves, foam, and bubbles do not differ from water. In the same way, all this which has emanated from oneself is no other than oneself.

5. When you analyse it, cloth is found to be just thread. In the same way, when all this is analysed it is found to be no other than oneself.

6. The sugar produced from the juice of the sugarcane is permeated throughout with the same taste. In the same way, all this, produced out of me, is completely permeated with myself.

7. From ignorance of oneself, the world appears, and by knowledge of oneself it appears no longer. From ignorance of the rope it appears to be a snake, and by knowledge of it it does so no longer.

8. Shining is my essential nature, and I am nothing other than that. When the world shines forth, it is only me that is shining forth.

9. All this appears in me imagined due to ignorance, just as a snake appears in the rope, the mirage of water in the sunlight, and silver in mother of pearl.

10. All this, which has originated out of me, is resolved back into me too, like a jug back into clay, a wave into water, and a bracelet into gold.

11. How wonderful I am! Glory to me, for whom there is no destruction, remaining even beyond the destruction of the world from Brahma down to the last clump of grass.

12. How wonderful I am! Glory to me, solitary even though with a body, neither going or coming anywhere, I who abide forever, filling all that is.

13. How wonderful I am! Glory to me! There is no one so clever as me! I who have borne all that is forever, without even touching it with my body!

14. How wonderful I am! Glory to me! I who possess nothing at all, or alternatively possess everything that speech and mind can refer to.

15. Knowledge, what is to be known, and the knower — these three do not exist in reality. I am the spotless reality in which they appear because of ignorance.

16. Truly dualism is the root of suffering. There is no other remedy for it than the realisation that all this that we see is unreal, and that I am the one stainless reality, consisting of consciousness.

17. I am pure awareness though through ignorance I have imagined myself to have additional attributes. By continually reflecting like this, my dwelling place is in the Unimagined.

18. For me here is neither bondage nor liberation. The illusion has lost its basis and ceased. Truly all this exists in me, though ultimately it does not even exist in me.

19. Recognising that all this and my body too are nothing, while my true self is nothing but pure consciousness, what is there left for the imagination to work on now?

20. The body, heaven and hell, bondage and liberation, and fear too, all this is pure imagination. What is there left to do for me whose very nature is consciousness?

21. I do not even see dualism in a crowd of people, so what do I gain if it is replaced by a desert?

22. I am not the body, nor is the body mine. I am not a living being. I am consciousness. It was my thirst for living that was my bondage.

23. Truly it is in the infinite ocean of myself, that, stimulated by the colourful waves of the world, everything suddenly arises in the wind of consciousness.

24. In the infinite ocean of myself, the wind of thought subsides, and the world boat of the living-being traders is wrecked by lack of goods.

25. How wonderful it is that in the infinite ocean of myself the waves of living beings arise, collide, play, and disappear, in accordance with their nature.

III

Ashtavakra said:

1. Knowing yourself as truly one and indestructible, how could a wise man possessing self-knowledge like you feel any pleasure in acquiring wealth?

2. Truly, when one does not know oneself, one takes pleasure in the objects of mistaken perception, just as greed arises for the mistaken silver in one who does not know mother of pearl for what it is.

3. All this wells up like waves in the sea. Recognising, “I am That,” why run around like someone in need?

4. After hearing of oneself as pure consciousness and the supremely beautiful, is one to go on lusting after sordid sexual objects?

5. When the sage has realised that he himself is in all beings, and all beings are in him, it is astonishing that the sense of individuality should be able to continue.

6. It is astonishing that a man who has reached the supreme nondual state and is intent on the benefits of liberation should still be subject to lust and in bondage to sexual activity.

7. It is astonishing that one already very debilitated, and knowing very well that its arousal is the enemy of knowledge, should still hanker after sensuality, even when approaching his last days.

8. It is astonishing that one who is unattached to the things of this world or the next, who discriminates between the permanent and the impermanent, and who longs for liberation, should still be afraid of liberation.

9. Whether feted or tormented, the wise man is always aware of his supreme self-nature and is neither pleased nor disappointed.

10. The great-souled person sees even his own body in action as if it were someone else’s, so how should he be disturbed by praise or blame?

11. Seeing this world as pure illusion, and devoid of any interest in it, how should the strong-minded person, feel fear, even at the approach of death?

12. Who can be compared to the great-souled person whose mind is free from desire even in disappointment, and who has found satisfaction in self-knowledge?

13. How should a strong-minded person who knows that what he sees is by its very nature nothing, consider one thing to be grasped and another to be rejected?

14. An object of enjoyment that comes of itself is neither painful nor pleasurable for someone who has eliminated attachment, and who is free from dualism and from desire.

IV

Ashtavakra said:

1. The wise person of self-knowledge, playing the game of worldly enjoyment, bears no resemblance whatever to samsara’s bewildered beasts of burden.

2. Truly the yogi feels no excitement even at being established in that state which all the Devas from Indra down yearn for disconsolately.

3. He who has known That is untouched within by good deeds or bad, just as space is not touched by smoke, however much it may appear to be.

4. Who can prevent the great-souled person who has known this whole world as himself from living as he pleases?

5. Of all four categories of beings, from Brahma down to the last clump of grass, only the man of knowledge is capable of eliminating desire and aversion.

6. Rare is the man who knows himself as the nondual Lord of the world, and he who knows this is not afraid of anything.

V

Ashtavakra said:

1. You are not bound by anything. What does a pure person like you need to renounce? Putting the complex organism to rest, you can find peace.

2. All this arises out of you, like a bubble out of the sea. Knowing yourself like this to be but one, you can find peace.

3. In spite of being in front of your eyes, all this, being insubstantial, does not exist in you, spotless as you are. It is an appearance like the snake in a rope, so you can find peace.

4. Equal in pain and in pleasure, equal in hope and in disappointment, equal in life and in death, and complete as you are, you can find peace.

VI

Ashtavakra said:

1. I am infinite like space, and the natural world is like a jar. To know this is knowledge, and then there is neither renunciation, acceptance, or cessation of it.

2. I am like the ocean, and the multiplicity of objects is comparable to a wave. To know this is knowledge, and then there is neither renunciation, acceptance or cessation of it.

3. I am like the mother of pearl, and the imagined world is like the silver. To know this is knowledge, and then there is neither renunciation, acceptance, or cessation of it.

4. Alternatively, I am in all beings, and all beings are in me. To know this is knowledge, and then there is neither renunciation, acceptance, or cessation of it.

VII

Janaka said:

1. In the infinite ocean of myself the world boat drifts here and there, moved by its own inner wind. I am not put out by that.

2. Whether the world wave of its own nature rises or disappears in the infinite ocean of myself, I neither gain nor lose anything by that.

3. It is in the infinite ocean of myself that the mind-creation called the world takes place. I am supremely peaceful and formless, and I remain as such.

4. My true nature is not contained in objects, nor does any object exist in it, for it is infinite and spotless. So it is unattached, desireless and at peace, and I remain as such.

5. I am pure consciousness, and the world is like a magician’s show. How could I imagine there is anything there to take up or reject?

VIII

Ashtavakra said:

1. Bondage is when the mind longs for something, grieves about something, rejects something, holds on to something, is pleased about something or displeased about something.

2. Liberation is when the mind does not long for anything, grieve about anything, reject anything, or hold on to anything, and is not pleased about anything or displeased about anything.

3. Bondage is when the mind is tangled in one of the senses, and liberation is when the mind is not tangled in any of the senses.

4. When there is no “me,” that is liberation, and when there is “me” there is bondage. Consider this carefully, and neither hold on to anything nor reject anything.

IX

Ashtavakra said:

1. Knowing when the dualism of things done and undone has been put to rest, or the person for whom they occur has, then you can here and now go beyond renunciation and obligations by indifference to such things.

2. Rare indeed, my son, is the lucky man whose observation of the world’s behaviour has led to the extinction of his thirst for living, thirst for pleasure, and thirst for knowledge.

3. All this is transient and spoiled by the three sorts of pain. Knowing it to be insubstantial, ignoble, and fit only for rejection, one attains peace.

4. When was that age or time of life when the dualism of extremes did not exist for men? Abandoning them, a person who is happy to take whatever comes attains perfection.

5. Who does not end up with indifference to such things and attain peace when he has seen the differences of opinions among the great sages, saints, and yogis?

6. Is he not a guru who, endowed with dispassion and equanimity, achieves full knowledge of the nature of consciousness, and leads others out of samsara?

7. If you would just see the transformations of the elements as nothing more than the elements, then you would immediately be freed from all bonds and established in your own nature.

8. One’s desires are samsara. Knowing this, abandon them. The renunciation of them is the renunciation of it. Now you can remain as you are.

X

Ashtavakra said:

1. Abandon desire, the enemy, along with gain, itself so full of loss, and the good deeds which are the cause of the other two — practice indifference to everything.

2. Look on such things as friends, land, money, property, wife, and bequests as nothing but a dream or a magician’s show lasting three or five days.

3. Wherever a desire occurs, see samsara in it. Establishing yourself in firm dispassion, be free of passion and happy.

4. The essential nature of bondage is nothing other than desire, and its elimination is known as liberation. It is simply by not being attached to changing things that the everlasting joy of attainment is reached.

5. You are one, conscious and pure, while all this is inert non-being. Ignorance itself is nothing, so what is the point of wanting to understand?

6. Kingdoms, children, wives, bodies, pleasures — these have all been lost to you life after life, attached to them though you were.

7. Enough of wealth, sensuality, and good deeds. In the forest of samsara the mind has never found satisfaction in these.

8. How many births have you not done hard and painful labour with body, mind, and speech. Now at last, stop!

XI

Ashtavakra said:

1. Unmoved and undistressed, realising that being, non-being and change are of the very nature of things, one easily finds peace.

2. At peace, having shed all desires within, and realising that nothing exists here but the Lord, the Creator of all things, one is no longer attached to anything.

3. Realising that misfortune and fortune come in their own time from fortune, one is contented, one’s senses under control, and does not like or dislike.

4. Realising that pleasure and pain, birth and death are from destiny, and that one’s desires cannot be achieved, one remains inactive, and even when acting does not get attached.

5. Realising that suffering arises from nothing other than thought, dropping all desires one rids oneself of it, and is happy and at peace everywhere.

6. Realising, “I am not the body, nor is the body mine. I am awareness,” one attains the supreme state and no longer remembers things done or undone.

7. Realising, “I alone exist, from Brahma down to the last clump of grass,” one becomes free from uncertainty, pure, at peace, and unconcerned about what has been attained or not.

8. Realising that all this varied and wonderful world is nothing, one becomes pure receptivity, free from inclinations, and as if nothing existed, one finds peace.

XII

Janaka said:

1. First of all I was averse to physical activity, then to lengthy speech, and finally to thought itself, which is why I am now established.

2. In the absence of delight in sound and the other senses, and by the fact that I am myself not an object of the senses, my mind is focused and free from distraction — which is why I am now established.

3. Owing to the distraction of such things as wrong identification, one is driven to strive for mental stillness. Recognising this pattern I am now established.

4. By relinquishing the sense of rejection and acceptance, and with pleasure and disappointment ceasing today, brahmin — I am now established.

5. Life in a community, then going beyond such a state, meditation and the elimination of mind-made objects — by means of these I have seen my error, and I am now established.

6. Just as the performance of actions is due to ignorance, so their abandonment is too. By fully recognising this truth, I am now established.

7. Trying to think the unthinkable, is doing something unnatural to thought. Abandoning such a practice therefore, I am now established.

8. He who has achieved this has achieved the goal of life. He who is of such a nature has done what has to be done.

XIII

Janaka said:

1. The inner freedom of having nothing is hard to achieve, even with just a loin-cloth, but I live as I please, abandoning both renunciation and acquisition.

2. Sometimes one experiences distress because of one’s body, sometimes because of one’s speech, and sometimes because of one’s mind. Abandoning all of these, I live as I please in the goal of human life.

3. Recognising that in reality no action is ever committed, I live as I please, just doing what presents itself to be done.

4. Yogis who identify themselves with their bodies are insistent on fulfilling and avoiding certain actions, but I live as I please abandoning attachment and rejection.

5. No benefit or loss comes to me by standing, walking or lying down, so consequently I live as I please whether standing, walking or sleeping.

6. I lose nothing by sleeping and gain nothing by effort, so consequently I live as I please, abandoning success and failure.

7. Continually observing the drawbacks of such things as pleasant objects, I live as I please, abandoning the pleasant and unpleasant.

XIV

Janaka said:

1. He who by nature is empty-minded, and who thinks of things only unintentionally, is freed from deliberate remembering like one awakened from a dream.

2. When my desire has been eliminated, I have no wealth, friends, robbers, senses, scriptures or knowledge.

3. Realising my supreme self-nature in the Person of the Witness, the Lord, and the state of desirelessness in bondage or liberation, I feel no inclination for liberation.

4. The various states of one who is free of uncertainty within, and who outwardly wanders about as he pleases like an idiot, can only be known by someone in the same condition.

XV

Ashtavakra said:

1. While a man of pure intelligence may achieve the goal by the most casual of instruction, another may seek knowledge all his life and still remain bewildered.

2. Liberation is distaste for the objects of the senses. Bondage is love of the senses. This is knowledge. Now do as you wish.

3. This awareness of the truth makes an eloquent, clever and energetic man dumb, stupid and lazy, so it is avoided by those whose aim is enjoyment.

4. You are not the body, nor is the body yours, nor are you the doer of actions or the reaper of their consequences. You are eternally pure consciousness, the witness, in need of nothing — so live happily.

5. Desire and anger are objects of the mind, but the mind is not yours, nor ever has been. You are choiceless awareness itself and unchanging — so live happily.

6. Recognising oneself in all beings, and all beings in oneself, be happy, free from the sense of responsibility and free from preoccupation with “me.”

7. Your nature is the consciousness, in which the whole world wells up, like waves in the sea. That is what you are, without any doubt, so be free of disturbance.

8. Have faith, my son, have faith. Don’t let yourself be deluded in this. You are yourself the Lord, whose very nature is knowledge, and you are beyond natural causation.

9. The body invested with the senses stands still, and comes and goes. You yourself neither come nor go, so why bother about them?

10. Let the body last to the end of the Age, or let it come to an end right now. What have you gained or lost, who consist of pure consciousness?

11. Let the world wave rise or subside according to its own nature in you, the great ocean. It is no gain or loss to you.

12. My son, you consist of pure consciousness, and the world is not separate from you. So who is to accept or reject it, and how, and why?

13. How can there be either birth, karma, or responsibility in that one unchanging, peaceful, unblemished, and infinite consciousness which is you?

14. Whatever you see, it is you alone manifest in it. How can bracelets, armlets and anklets be different from the gold they are made of?

15. Giving up such distinctions as “He is what I am,” and “I am not that,” recognise that “Everything is myself,” and be without distinction and happy.

16. It is through your ignorance that all this exists. In reality you alone exist. Apart from you there is no one within or beyond samsara.

17. Knowing that all this is just an illusion, one becomes free of desire, pure receptivity, and at peace, as if nothing existed.

18. Only one thing has existed, exists and will exist in the ocean of being. You have no bondage or liberation. Live happily and fulfilled.

19. Being pure consciousness, do not disturb your mind with thoughts of for and against. Be at peace and remain happily in yourself, the essence ofjoy.

20. Give up meditation completely but don’t let the mind hold on to anything. You are free by nature, so what will you achieve by forcing the mind?

XVI

Ashtavakra said:

1. My son, you may recite or listen to countless scriptures, but you will not be established within until you can forget everything.

2. You may, as a learned man, indulge in wealth, activity, and meditation, but your mind will still long for that which is the cessation of desire, and beyond all goals.

3. Everyone is in pain because of their striving to achieve something, but noone realises it. By no more than this instruction, the fortunate one attains tranquillity.

4. Happiness belongs to noone but that supremely lazy man for whom even opening and closing his eyes is a bother.

5. When the mind is freed from such pairs of opposites as, “I have done this,” and “I have not done that,” it becomes indifferent to merit, wealth, sensuality and liberation.

6. One man is abstemious and averse to the senses, another is greedy and attached to them, but he who is free from both taking and rejecting is neither abstemious nor greedy.

7. So long as desire, the state of lack of discrimination, remains, the sense of revulsion and attraction will remain, which is the root and branch of samsara.

8. Desire springs from usage, and aversion from abstension, but the wise man is free from the pairs of opposites like a child, and becomes established.

9. The passionate man wants to eliminate samsara so as to avoid pain, but the dispassionate man is free from pain and feels no distress even in it.

10. He who is proud about even liberation or his own body, and feels them his own, is neither a seer nor a yogi. He is still just a sufferer.

11. If even Shiva, Vishnu, or the lotus-born Brahma were your instructor, until you have forgotten everything you cannot be established within.

XVII

Ashtavakra said:

1. He who is content, with purified senses, and always enjoys solitude, has gained the fruit of knowledge and the fruit of the practice of yoga too.

2. The knower of truth is never distressed in this world, for the whole round world is full of himself alone.

3. None of these senses please a man who has found satisfaction within, just as Nimba leaves do not please the elephant that has acquired the taste for Sallaki leaves.

4. The man is rare who is not attached to the things he has enjoyed, and does not hanker after the things he has not enjoyed.

5. Those who desire pleasure and those who desire liberation are both found in samsara, but the great-souled man who desires neither pleasure nor liberation is rare indeed.

6. It is only the noble-minded who is free from attraction or repulsion to religion, wealth, sensuality, and life and death too.

7. He feels no desire for the elimination of all this, nor anger at its continuing, so the fortunate man lives happily with whatever sustinence presents itself.

8. Thus fulfilled through this knowledge, contented, and with the thinking mind emptied, he lives happily just seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling, and tasting.

9. In him for whom the ocean of samsara has dried up, there is neither attachment or aversion. His gaze is vacant, his behaviour purposeless, and his senses inactive.

10. Surely the supreme state is everywhere for the liberated mind. He is neither awake nor asleep, and neither opens nor closes his eyes.

11. The liberated man is resplendent everywhere, free from all desires. Everywhere he appears self-possessed and pure of heart.

12. Seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling, tasting, speaking, and walking about, the great-souled man who is freed from trying to achieve or avoid anything is free indeed.

13. The liberated man is free from desires everywhere. He neither blames, praises, rejoices, is disappointed, gives, nor takes.

14. When a great-souled one is unperturbed in mind, and equally self-possessed at either the sight of a woman inflamed with desire or at approaching death, he is truly liberated.

15. There is no distinction between pleasure and pain, man and woman, success and failure for the wise man who looks on everything as equal.

16. There is no aggression nor compassion, no pride nor humility, no wonder nor confusion for the man whose days of samsara are over.

17. The liberated man is not averse to the senses nor is he attached to them. He enjoys hinself continually with an unattached mind in both success and failure.

18. One established in the Absolute state with an empty mind does not know the alternatives of inner stillness and lack of inner stillness, and of good and evil.

19. A man free of “me” and “mine” and of a sense of responsibility, aware that “Nothing exists,” with all desires extinguished within, does not act even in acting.

20. He whose thinking mind is dissolved achieves the indescribable state and is free from the mental display of delusion, dream, and ignorance.

XVIII

Ashtavakra said:

1. Praise be to That by the awareness of which delusion itself becomes dream-like, to that which is pure happiness, peace, and light.

2. One may get all sorts of pleasure by the acquisition of various objects of enjoyment, but one cannot be happy except by the renunciation of everything.

3. How can there be happiness, for one who has been burnt inside by the blistering sun of the pain of thinking that there are things that still need doing, without the rain of the nectar of peace?

4. This existence is just imagination. It is nothing in reality, but there is no non-being for natures that know how to distinguish being from nonbeing.

5. The realm of one’s self is not far away, nor can it be achieved by the addition of limitations to its nature. It is unimaginable, effortless, unchanging, and spotless.

6. By the simple elimination of delusion and the recognition of one’s true nature, those whose vision is unclouded live free from sorrow.

7. Knowing everything as just imagination, and himself as eternally free, how should the wise man behave like a fool?

8. Knowing himself to be God, and being and non-being just imagination, what should the man free from desire learn, say, or do?

9. Considerations like “I am this” or “I am not this” are finished for the yogi who has gone silent realising “Everything is myself.”

10. For the yogi who has found peace, there is no distraction or one-pointedness, no higher knowledge or ignorance, no pleasure and no pain.

11. The dominion of heaven or beggary, gain or loss, life among men or in the forest, these make no difference to a yogi whose nature it is to be free from distinctions.

12. There are no religious obligations, wealth, sensuality, or discrimination for a yogi free from such opposites as “I have done this,” and “I have not done that.”

13. There is nothing needing to be done or any attachment in his heart for the yogi liberated while still alive. Things things will last just to the end of life.

14. There is no delusion, world, meditation on That, or liberation for the pacified great soul. All these things are just the realm of imagination.

15. He by whom all this is seen may well make out it doesn’t exist, but what is the desireless one to do? Even in seeing it he does not see it.

16. He by whom the Supreme Brahma is seen may think “I am Brahma,” but what is he to think who is without thought, and who sees no duality?

17. He by whom inner distraction is seen may put an end to it, but the noble one is not distracted. When there is nothing to achieve what is he to do?

18. The wise man, unlike the worldly man, does not see inner stillness, distraction, or fault in himself, even when living like a worldly man.

19. Nothing is done by him who is free from being and non-being, who is contented, desireless, and wise, even if in the world’s eyes he does act.

20. The wise man who just goes on doing what presents itself for him to do, encounters no difficulty in either activity or inactivity.

21. He who is desireless, self-reliant, independent, and free of bonds functions like a dead leaf blown about by the wind of causality.

22. There is neither joy nor sorrow for one who has transcended samsara. With a peaceful mind he lives as if without a body.

23. He whose joy is in himself, and who is peaceful and pure within has no desire for renunciation or sense of loss in anything.

24. For the man with a naturally empty mind, doing just as he pleases, there is no such thing as pride or false humility, as there is for the naturalman.

25. “This action was done by the body but not by me.” The pure-natured person thinking like this, is not acting even when acting.

26. He who acts without being able to say why, but is not thereby a fool, he is one liberated while still alive, happy and blessed. He is happy even in samsara.

27. He who has had enough of endless considerations and has attained peace, does not think, know, hear, or see.

28. He who is beyond mental stillness and distraction does not desire either liberation or its opposite. Recognising that things are just constructions of the imagination, that great soul lives as God here and now.

29. He who feels responsibility within, acts even when doing nothing, but there is no sense of done or undone for the wise man who is free from the sense of responsibility.

30. The mind of the liberated man is not upset or pleased. It shines unmoving, desireless, and free from doubt.

31. He whose mind does not set out to meditate or act, still meditates and acts but without an object.

32. A stupid man is bewildered when he hears the ultimate truth, while even a clever man is humbled by it just like the fool.

33. The ignorant make a great effort to practise one-pointedness and the stopping of thought, while the wise see nothing to be done and remain in themselves like those asleep.

34. The stupid man does not attain cessation whether he acts or abandons action, while the wise man finds peace within simply by knowing the truth.

35. People cannot come to know themselves by practices — pure awareness, clear, complete, beyond multiplicity, and faultless though they are.

36. The stupid man does not achieve liberation even through regular practice, but the fortunate remains free and actionless simply by understanding.

37. The stupid does not attain Godhead because he wants it, while the wise man enjoys the Supreme Godhead without even wanting it.

38. Even when living without any support and eager for achievement, the stupid are still nourishing samsara, while the wise have cut at the very root of its unhappiness.

39. The stupid man does not find peace because he desires it, while the wise man discriminating the truth is always peaceful minded.

40. How can there be self-knowledge for him whose knowledge depends on what he sees? The wise do not see this and that, but see themselves as infinite.

41. How can there be cessation of thought for the misguided who is striving for it. Yet it is there always naturally for the wise man delighting in himself.

42. Some think that something exists, and others that nothing does. Rare is the man who does not think either, and is thereby free from distraction.

43. Those of weak intelligence think of themselves as pure nonduality, but because of their delusion do not really know this, and so remain unfulfilled all their lives.

44. The mind of the man seeking liberation can find no resting place within, but the mind of the liberated man is always free from desire by the very fact of being without a resting place.

45. Seeing the tigers of the senses, the frightened refuge-seekers at once enter the cave in search of cessation of thought and one-pointedness.

46. Seeing the desireless lion, the elephants of the senses silently run away, or, if that is impossible, serve him like courtiers.

47. The man who is free from doubts and whose mind is free does not bother about means of liberation. Whether seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling, or tasting, he lives at ease.

48. He whose mind is pure and undistracted from just hearing of the Truth does not see anything to do or anything to avoid or even a cause for indifference.

49. The upright person does whatever presents itself to be done, good or bad, for his actions are like those of a child.

50. By inner freedom one attains happiness, by inner freedom one reaches the Supreme, by inner freedom one comes to absence of thought, by inner freedom to the Ultimate State.

51. When one sees oneself as neither the doer nor the reaper of the consequences, then all mind waves come to an end.

52. The spontaneous unassuming behaviour of the wise is noteworthy, but not the deliberate purposeful stillness of the fool.

53. The wise who are rid of imagination, unbound and with unfettered awareness, may enjoy themselves in the midst of many goods, or alternatively go off to mountain caves.

54. There is no attachment in the heart of a wise man whether he sees or pays homage to a learned brahmin, a celestial being, a holy place, a woman, a king or a friend.

55. A yogi is not in the least put out even when humiliated by the ridicule of servants, sons, wives, grandchildren, or other relatives.

56. Even when pleased he is not pleased, not suffering even when in pain. Only those like him can know the wonderful state of such a man.

57. It is the feeling that there is something that needs to be achieved which is samsara. The wise who are of the form of emptiness, formless, unchanging, and spotless see nothing of the sort.

58. Even when doing nothing the fool is agitated by restlessness, while a skillful man remains undisturbed even when doing what there is to do.

59. Happy he stands, happy he sits, happy sleeps, and happy he comes and goes. Happy he speaks and happy he eats. This is the life of a man at peace.

60. He who of his very nature feels no unhappiness in his daily life like worldly people, remains undisturbed like a great lake, cleared of defilement.

61. Even abstention from action has the effect of action in a fool, while even the action of the wise man brings the fruits of inaction.

62. A fool often shows aversion towards his belongings, but for him whose attachment to the body has dropped away, there is neither attachment nor aversion.

63. The mind of the fool is always caught in thinking or not thinking, but the wise man’s is of the nature of no thought because he thinks what is appropriate.

64. For the seer who behaves like a child, without desire in all actions, there is no attachment for such a pure one even in the work he does.

65. Blessed is he who knows himself and is the same in all states, with a mind free from craving whether he is seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling, or tasting.

66. There is no one subject to samsara, no sense of individuality, no goal or means to the goal in the eyes of the wise man who is always free from imagination and unchanging like space.

67. Glorious is he who has abandoned all goals and is the incarnation of the satisfaction, which is his very nature, and whose inner focus on the Unconditioned is quite spontaneous.

68. In brief, the great-souled man who has come to know the Truth is without desire for either pleasure or liberation, and is always and everywhere free from attachment.

69. What remains to be done by the man who is pure awareness and has abandoned everything that can be expressed in words from the highest heaven to the earth itself?

70. The pure man who has experienced the Indescribable attains peace by virtue of his very nature, realising that all this is nothing but illusion, and that nothing is.

71. There are no rules, dispassion, renunciation, or meditation for one who is pure receptivity by nature, and admits no knowable form of being.

72. For him who shines with the radiance of Infinity and is not subject to natural causality there is neither bondage, liberation, pleasure, nor pain.

73. Pure illusion reigns in samsara which will continue until self-realisation, but the enlightened man lives in the beauty of freedom from me and mine, from the sense of responsibility and from any attachment.

74. For the seer who knows himself as imperishable and beyond pain there is neither knowledge, a world, nor the sense that I am the body or the body mine.

75. No sooner does a man of low intelligence give up activities like the elimination of thought than he falls into mind racing and chatter.

76. A fool does not get rid of his stupidity even on hearing the truth. He may appear outwardly free from imaginations, but inside he is still hankering after the senses.

77. Though in the eyes of the world he is active, the man who has shed action through knowledge finds no means of doing or speaking anything.

78. For the wise man who is always unchanging and fearless there is neither darkness nor light nor destruction nor anything.

79. There is neither fortitude, prudence, nor courage for the yogi whose nature is beyond description and free of individuality.

80. There is neither heaven nor hell nor even liberation during life. In a nutshell, in the sight of the seer nothing exists at all.

81. He neither longs for possessions nor grieves at their absence. The calm mind of the sage is full of the nectar of immortality.

82. The dispassionate man does not praise the good or blame the wicked. Content and equal in pain and pleasure, he sees nothing that needs doing.

83. The wise man is not averse to samsara, nor does he seek to know himself. Free from pleasure and impatience, he is not dead and he is not alive.

84. The wise man excels by being free from anticipation, without attachment to such things as children or wives, free from desire for the senses,and not even concerned about his own body.

85. The wise man, who lives on whatever happens to come to him, roams wherever he pleases, and sleeps wherever the sun happens to set, is at peace everywhere.

86. Whether his body rises or falls, the great-souled one gives it no thought, having forgotten all about samsara in coming to rest on the ground of his true nature.

87. The wise man has the joy of being complete in himself and without possessions, acting as he pleases, free from duality and rid of doubts, and without attachment to any creature.

88. The wise man excels in being without the sense of “me”. Earth, a stone, or gold are the same to him. The knots of his heart have been rent asunder, and he is freed from greed and blindness.

89. Who can compare with that contented, liberated soul who pays no regard to anything and has no desire left in his heart?

90. Who but the upright man without desire knows without knowing, sees without seeing, and speaks without speaking?

91. Beggar or king, he excels who is without desire, and whose opinion of things is rid of “good” and “bad.”

92. There is neither dissolute behaviour nor virtue, nor even discrimination of the truth for the sage who has reached the goal and is the very embodiment of guileless sincerity.

93. That which is experienced within by one who is desireless and free from pain, and content to rest in himself — how could it be described, and of whom?

94. The wise man who is contented in all circumstances is not asleep even in deep sleep, nor sleeping in a dream, nor waking when he is awake.

95. The seer is without thoughts even when thinking, without senses among the senses, without understanding even in understanding, and without a sense of responsibility even in the ego.

96. Neither happy nor unhappy, neither detached nor attached, neither seeking liberation nor liberated, he is neither something nor nothing.

97. Not distracted in distraction, in mental stillness not poised, in stupidity not stupid, that blessed one is not even wise in his wisdom.

98. The liberated man is self-possessed in all circumstances and free from the idea of “done” and “still to do.” He is the same wherever he is and without greed. He does not dwell on what he has done or not done.

99. He is not pleased when praised nor upset when blamed. He is not afraid of death nor attached to life.

100. A man at peace does not run off to popular resorts or to the forest. Whatever and wherever, he remains the same.

XIX

Janaka said:

1. Using the tweezers of the knowledge of the truth I have managed to extract the painful thorn of endless opinions from the recesses of my heart.

2. For me, established in my own glory, there are no religious obligations, sensuality, possessions, philosophy, duality, or even nonduality.

3. For me established in my own glory, there is no past, future, or present. There is no space or even eternity.

4. For me established in my own glory, there is no self or non-self, no good or evil, no thought or even absence of thought.

5. For me established in my own glory, there is no dreaming or deep sleep, no waking nor fourth state beyond them, and certainly no fear.

6. For me established in my own glory, there is nothing far away and nothing near, nothing within or without, nothing large and nothing small.

7. For me established in my own glory, there is no life or death, no worlds or things of this world, no distraction and no stillness of mind.

8. For me remaining in myself, there is no need for talk of the three goals of life, of yoga or of knowledge.

XX

Janaka said:

1. In my unblemished nature there are no elements, no body, no faculties, no mind. There is no void and no despair.

2. For me, free from the sense of dualism, there are no scriptures, no self-knowledge, no mind free from an object, no satisfaction and no freedom from desire.

3. There is no knowledge or ignorance, no “me,” “this,” or “mine,” no bondage, no liberation, and no property of self-nature.

4. For him who is always free from individual characteristics there is no antecedent causal action, no liberation during life, and no fulfilment at death.

5. For me, free from individuality, there is no doer and no reaper of the consequences, no cessation of action, no arising of thought, no immediate object, and no idea of results.

6. There is no world, no seeker for liberation, no yogi, no seer, no one bound and no one liberated. I remain in my own nondual nature.

7. There is no emanation or return, no goal, means, seeker or achievement. I remain in my own nondual nature.

8. For me who am forever unblemished, there is no assessor, no standard, nothing to assess, and no assessment.

9. For me who am forever actionless, there is no distraction or one-pointedness of mind, no lack of understanding, no stupidity, no joy and no sorrow.

10. For me who am always free from deliberations there is neither conventional truth nor absolute truth, no happiness and no suffering.

11. For me who am forever pure there is no illusion, no samsara, no attachment or detachment, no living organism, and no God.

12. For me who am forever unmovable and indivisible, established in myself, there is no activity or inactivity, no liberation and no bondage.

13. For me who am blessed and without limitation, there is no initiation or scripture, no disciple or teacher, and no goal of human life.

14. There is no being or non-being, no unity or dualism. What more is there to say? There is nothing outside of me.

Nahi Jnanena Sadrsham

Nothing is equivalent to knowledge

Vasudaiva Kutumbakam

The whole earth is a family

Satyameva Jayate

Truth always triumphs

Dharmo Rakshathi Rakshithaha

He who carries out his duties shall be protected

Sarvejana Sukhinobhavanthu

May all the people in this universe live with happiness and prosperity

Janma Jaata Shudra Sarve

Karmenu Brahman Bhavati

All humans are inferior (Shudra) by birth and they become superior (Brahmins) only by their good deeds later in their life.

Asatho Ma Sathgamaya,

Thamaso Ma Jyothirgamaya

Mruthyorma Amrthangamya

Lead me towards truth from untruth

Lead me towards light from darkness

Lead me towards immortality from Death

Yatra Naaryasthu poojyanthe

Ramanethe thatra devathaha

Where women are treated with dignity and Womanhood is worshipped, there Roam the GODS

Ekam Sat Vipraha bahudha vadanti

There is but one God, learned scholars call this God by different names

Isha vasya midam sarvam

The entire universe is pervaded by God

Sarve amritasya putrah

We are all the children of God

Ati Vinayam Dhoortha Lakshanam

Too much of humbleness is an attribute of a wicked person

Aham Brahmasmi

I am God (indicating God lives inside humans)

Lobhaha Papasya Karanam

Greed is the root cause of sin

Matru Devo Bhava Pitru Devo Bhava

Acharya Devo Bhava Athithi Devo Bhava

Treat your Mother, Father, Teacher and Guest like a God

Satyam bruyat priyam bruyat na bruyat satyam apriyam

priyam cha nanrutam bruyat esha dharmah sanatanah

Only speak the truth that is pleasant to others

Do no speak the truth that might be unpleasant to others

Never speak untruth that is pleasant to others

This is the path of the eternal morality called Sanatana Dharma

Annam na nindhyath

Annam na pari-chaksheeta

Annam bahu kurveeta

Do not abuse food

Do not discard food

Grow food in abundance!

shubham karoti kalyaaNam aarogyam dhanasampadaa

shatrubuddhi vinaashaaya deepajyoti namostute

I salute the light from the lamp, the one that brings auspiciousness, prosperity, good health, abundance of wealth, and the destruction of the intellect’s enemy!

(said while lighting the evening lamp)

Kaalaaya Tasmai Namaha

Salutations to that great entity called TIME

Satyam Vadha Dharmam Chara

Speak the truth, follow the righteous path

Aa no bhadrah kratavo yantu vishwatah

May auspicious thoughts come to us from all over the world.

Mata Bhumih putro ham prithvyah

Earth is our mother and we are its children.

Have you ever thought about how much your actions mean to someone? Maybe that smile you gave to a stranger today made their bad day better. Maybe that hello you gave to a classmate today made them realize people actually notice and care for them. Maybe that money you gave to a homeless man today made him think in the good the world has to offer again. Maybe hanging out with someone today made them forget all their problems for awhile. Keep it up.

You are capable of loving and of being loved. You deserve nothing less. You are not perfect. There may be parts of you that you would change if you could, but accept that some things cannot be changed. This acceptance isn’t easy, but it makes you a stronger person. Try your best not to dwell on your imperfections. Instead, try to see them as just part of a beautiful whole. The same things that make you different make you beautiful.

Everything around us is made up of energy. To attract positive things in your life, start by giving off positive energy You must make a choice to take a chance or your life will never change.

If you know you have to wait anyway, why not make a decision to enjoy your life while you’re waiting?

Relationships fail because of trust issues, commitment issues and communication issues. So trust, commit, and communicate always. The best way to prepare for the future is to take care of the present.

Small changes eventually add up to huge results. It takes one positive thought to overpower an entire array of negative thoughts.You only get one chance to make a good impression. Some opportunities only come once. Be ready.

Each experience through which you pass operates ultimately for your own good. Always be kind and compassionate. You never know what kind of pain someone may be enduring. One of the best feelings in the world is knowing your Presence and Absence both mean something to someone.

Just because you have faced many defeats in your life, does not mean you have been defeated.

Keeping baggage from the past will leave no room for happiness in the future.

your attitude + your choices = your happiness.

Life is full of setbacks. Success is determined by how you handle setbacks.

There is no need to carry any burden while doing Right thing Right now . If it is done well, the future will look after itself. Keep it simple. Keep it light. Keep it effortless. Be alert to what you are doing.

Stop focusing on what you DON’T want in your life. The more you think about it, the more you affirm and attract what you fear into your everyday experiences. Focus on positive outcomes

Something I have learned through all this is that there are really no wrong decisions… just choices that will take your life down a totally different path.

Live the life you want to live. Be the person you want them to remember. Make decisions and make mistakes. And if you die trying, at least you tried.

Any lack in skill can be more than made up for by how hard you work toward a goal you care about.

It’s not the answers you get from others, but the questions you ask yourself that will help you heal: What part of my life feels broken? What do I need to repair, to learn, to accept, to reject, or embrace before I can give myself permission to simply do what I know in my heart feels right?

To the world, you might be just one person. But to one person, you might be the world.

You are worthy of your desires. Really wanting what you want gives you the power to get it. You were born free. You are worthy of love and respect. You get what you deserve if your desure us strong enough and if you are determined to dedicate your efforts in right direction.

The first step to living the life you want is leaving the life you don’t want.

http://everydaylifelessons.com/random

108 Sarana Gosham

Om Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa

Add the words ‘Saranam Ayyappa‘ after each line:

1. Swamiye
2. Harihara Suthane
3. Kannimoola Mahaa Ganapathy Bhagavaane
4. Shakti Vadivelan Sodarane
5. Maalikaippurattu Manjamma Devi Lokamathave
6. Vaavar Swamiye
7. Karuppanna Swamiye
8. Periya Kadutta Swamiye
9. Cheriya Kadutta Swamiye
10. Vana devathamaare
11. Durga Bhagavathi maare
12. Achchan Kovil Arase /Achchan Kovil Rajave
13. Anaadha Rakshagane
14. Annadhaana Prabhuve
15. Achcham Thavirpavane
16. Ambalathu Aasane
17. Abhaya Dayakane
18. Ahandai Azhippavane
19. AshtaSiddhi Dayagane
20. Andmorai Aadarikkum Deivame
21. Azhuthayil Vaasane
22. Aaryankaavu Ayyaave
23. Aapath Baandhavane
24. Ananda Jyotiye
25. Aatma Swaroopiye
26. Aanaimukhan Thambiye
27. lrumudi Priyane
28. lnalai Therppavane
29. Heha para suka daayakane
30. Irudaya kamala vaasane
31. Eedillaa inbam alippavane
32. Umaiyaval baalakane
33. Umaikku arul purindavane
34. Uzhvinai akatruvone
35. Ukkam alippavane
36. Engum niraindhone
37. Enillaa roopane
38. En kula deivame
39. En guru naathane
40. Erumeli vaazhum kiraata -Shasthave
41. Engum nirainda naada brahmame
42. Ellorkkum arul puribavane
43. Aetrumaanoorappan magane
44. Aekaanta vaasiye
45. Aezhaikkarul puriyum eesane
46. Aindumalai vaasane
47. Aiyyangal teerppavane
48. Opillaa maanikkame
49. Omkaara parabrahmame
50. Kaliyuga varadane
51. Kan.kanda deivame
52. Kambankudiku udaiya naathane
53. Karunaa samudrame
54. Karpoora jyotiye
55. Sabari giri vaasane
56. Shathru samhaara moortiye
57. Sharanaagadha rakshakane
58. Sharana ghosha priyane
59. Shabarikku arul purindavane
60. Shambhukumaarane
61. Satya swaroopane
62. Sankatam therppavane
63. Sanchalam azhippavane
64. Shanmukha sodarane
65. Dhanvantari moortiye
66. Nambmorai kaakkum deivame
67. Narttana priyane
68. Pantala raajakumaarane
69. Pambai baalakane
70. Parasuraama poojithane
71. Bhakta jana rakshakane
72. Bhakta vatsalane
73. Paramashivan puthirane
74. Pambaa vaasane
75. Parama dhayaalane
76. Manikanda porule
77. Makara jyotiye
78. Vaikkathu appan makane
79. Kaanaka vaasane
80. Kulattu puzhai baalakane
81. Guruvaayoorappan makane
82. Kaivalya padha daayakane
83. Jaati mata bhedam illathavane
84. Shivashakti Aikya svaroopane
85. Sevipparku aananda moorthiye
86. Dushtar bhayam neekkuvone
87. Devaadi devane
88. Devarkal thuyaram therthavane
89. Devendra poojitane
90. Narayanan mynthane
91. Neiabhisheka priyane
92. Pranava swaroopane
93. Paapa samhaara moorthiye
94. Paayasanna priyane
95. Vanpuli vaakanane
96. Varapradaayakane
97. Bhaagavatottamane
98. Ponambala vaasane
99. Mohini sudhane
100. Mohana roopane
101. Vilaali veerane
102. Veeramani kantane
103. Sadguru nathane
104. Sarva rokanivarakane
105. Sachi ananda sorupiye
106. Sarvaabheestha thayakane
107. Saasvatapadam alippavane
108. Patinettaam padikkutaiyanaadhane

Om Mahasasre namaha
Om Mahadevaya namaha
Om Mahadeva sutaya namaha
Om Avyaya namaha
Om Lokakarte namaha
Om Lokabharte namaha
Om Paraatparaya namaha
Om Triloka rakshakaya namaha
Om Dhanwine namaha
Om Tapaswine namaha
Om Bhootasaivikaya namaha
Om Mantravedine namaha
Om Marutaya namaha
Om Jagadeeswaraya namaha
Om Lokadakshya namaha
Om Agraganye namaha
Om Srimatai namaha
Om Aprameya parakramaya namaha
Om Simharoodaya namaha
Om Gajaroodaya namaha
Om Hayaaroodaya namaha
Om Maheswaraya namaha
Om Nanasastradharaya namaha
Om Anrgharaya namaha
Om Nanavidyavisaradaya namaha
Om Nanaroopa dharaya namaha
Om Veera namaha
Om Nanaprani nishevakaya namaha
Om Bhhotesaya namaha
Om Bhootidaya namaha
Om Brutya namaha
Om Bhujangabharanojwalaya namaha
Om Ikshudhanwine namaha
Om Pushabhanaya namaha
Om Maharoopaya namaha
Om Mahaprabhuvaye namaha
Om Maayadevi sutaya namaha
Om Manyaya namaha
Om Mahaneetaya namaha
Om Mahagunaya namaha
Om Mahasaivaya namaha
Om Maharudraya namaha
Om Vishnavaya namaha
Om Vishnupoojakaya namaha
Om Vigneswasi namaha
Om Veerabhadresaya namaha
Om Veerabhadrasaya namaha
Om Bhairavaya namaha
Om Shanmukhadruvaya namaha
Om Meerusrunga samaseenaya namaha
Om Munisangha nishevitaya namaha
Om Devaya namaha
Om Bhadraya namaha
Om Jagannadhaya namaha
Om Gananadaya namaha
Om Ganeswaraya namaha
Om Mahayogine namaha
Om Mahamayane namaha
Om Mahastiraya namaha
Om Devasastre namaha
Om Bhootasastre namaha
Om Bheemashaya parakramaya namaha
Om Nagaharaya namaha
Om Nagakesaya namaha
Om Vyomakesaya namaha
Om Sanatayana namaha
Om Sugunaya namaha
Om Nirgunaya namaha
Om Nityaya namaha
Om Nityatruptaya namaha
Om Nirastrayaya namaha
Om Lokasrayaya namaha
Om Ganadheesaya namaha
Om Chatustrusti kalamayaya namaha
Om Rugyajussamadharvana namaha
Om Roopanai namaha
Om Mallikasura Banjakaya namaha
Om Trimoortaye namaha
Om Daityamadhanaya namaha
Om Prakrukataye namaha
Om Purushottamaya namaha
Om Kalagyanine namaha
Om Kamadaya namaha
Om Kamaleshanaya namaha
Om Kamaleshanaya namaha
Om Kalpavruskya namaha
Om Mahavrushkaya namaha
Om Vidyavrukshaya namaha
Om Vibhootidaya namaha
Om Samsaratapa vitchhetrye namaha
Om Pasuloka bayamkaraya namaha
Om Rohahantre namaha
Om Pranadatre namaha
Om Paragava vibhujanaya namaha
Om Sarvasastradhatatwagyanaya namaha
Om Neetimate namaha
Om Papabhanjanaha namaha
Om Pushalaoornasamyuktaya namaha
Om Parmatmane namaha
Om Satangaye namaha
Om Anantadityasamkasaya namaha
Om Subramanyanyujaya namaha
Om Bhaline namaha
Om Bhaktanu kampine namaha
Om Devasaya namaha
Om Bhaghavate namaha
Om Bhaktavastalaya namaha

Harivarasanam Viswamohanam Haridadhiswaram Aaradhyapadhukam

Arivimardhanam Nithyanarthanam Hariharatmajam Devamashreye

Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa

Saranakirtanam Bakhtamanasam Bharanalolupam Narthanalasam

Arunabhasuram Bhoothanayakam Hariharatmajam Devamashreye

Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa

Pranayasathyakam Praananayakam Pranathakalpakam Suprabhanjitham

Pranavamanidram Keerthanapriyam Hariharatmajam Devamashreye

Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa

Thuragavahanam Sundarananam Varagadhayudham Vedavavarnitham

Gurukrupakaram Keerthanapriyam Hariharatmajam Devamashreye

Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa

Tribuvanarchitam Devathathmakam Trinayanam Prabhum Divyadeshikam

Tridashapoojitham Chinthithapradam Hariharatmajam Devamashreye

Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa

Bhavabhayapaham Bhavukavaham Bhuvanamohanam Bhoothibhooshanam

Dhavalavahanam DivyavaranamHariharatmajam Devamashreye

Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa

Kalamrudusmitham Sundarananam Kalabhakomalam Gathramohanam

Kalabhakesari Vajivahanam Hariharatmajam Devamashreye

Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa

Srithajanapriyam Chinthithapradam Sruthivibhushanam Sadhujeevanam

Sruthimanoharam Geethalalasam Hariharatmajam Devamashreye

Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa Saranam Ayyappa Swamy Saranam Ayyappa

Loka Veeram Maha Poojyam, Sarvarakshakaram Vibhum !

Parvathi Hridayanandam, Saasthaaram Pranamamyaham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 1 !!

Viprapoojyam Viswavandyam, Vishnu Shambho Priyam Sutham !

Kshipraprasaada Niratam, Saasthaaram Pranamamyaham

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 2 !!

Mattha Maatanga Gamanam, Kaarunyaamrita Pooritam !

Sarva Vighnaharam Devam, Saasthaaram Pranamamyaham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 3 !!

Asmatkuleswaram Devam, Asmat Shatru Vinaashanam !

Asmadista Pradaataram, Saasthaaram Pranamamyaham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 4 !!

Pandyesha Vamsa Tilakam Keraley Keli Vigraham !

Aarta Thraana Param Devam, Saasthaaram Pranamamyaham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 5 !!

Pancha Ratnaakya Methadyo Nityam Shudha Patennaraha !

Tasya Prasanno Bhagawaan Saastha Vasathi Maanase !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 6 !!

Sabarigiri Nivaasam Shaantha Hrid Padma Hamsam !

Sashi Ruchi Mrithuhaasam Shyamalam Bhodha Bhaasam !!

Kalitha Ripu Niraasam Kaantha Mrithunga Naasam !!

Nathinuthi Paradaasam Naumi Pinjaava Thamsam !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 7 !!

Sabarigiri Nishaantham Shange Kundenthu Dhantham !

Shamadhana Hridi Bhaantham Shatru Paalee Krithaantham !!

Sarasija Ripukaantham Saanu Kampeksha Naantham

Kritha Nutha Vipadantham Keerthaye Hum Nithaantham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 8 !!

Sabarigiri Kalaapam Shaastra Vadhwaantha Deepam

Shamitha Sujanathaapam Shanthiheer Nir Dhuraapam !

Kara Dhrutha Sumachaapam Kaarano Paatha Rupam !

Kacha Kalitha Kalaapam Kaamaye Pushkalabham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 9 !!

Sabarigiriniketham Shankaropendrapotham

Shakalitha Dhithijaatham Shatruji Moothapaatham !

Padanatha Puruhutham Paalitha Shesha Bhootham

Bhavajala Nidhi Bhotham Bhavaye Nitye Bhootham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 10 !!

Sabari Vihrithi Lokham Shyamalo Ddhaara Chelam

Shathamakha Ripukaalam Sarva Vaikunta Balam !

Nathajana Surajaalam Naaki Lokaanukoolam

Navamayamani Maalam Naumi Nisshesha Moolam !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 11 !!

Sabarigirikuteeram Shatru Samghaatha Ghoram

Shatagiri Shathadhaaram Shashpi Theyndraari Shooram !!

Harigirisha Kumaarem Haari Keyura Haaram

Navajaladha Shareeram Naumi Vishwaika Veeram !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 12 !!

Sarasija Dalanethram Saara Saaraathi Vakthram

Sajala Jaladha Ghaathram Saandhra Kaarunya Paathram !

Sahathanaya Kalanthram Saambha Govinda Puthram

Sakala Vibhudha Mithram Sannamam Pavithram !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 13 !!

Shridhaa Nanda Chinthamani Shreenivasam

Sada Sacchidaananda Purna Prakasham !

Udhaaram Sadhaaram Suraadhaara meesham

Param Jyothi Rupam Bhaje Bhootha Naatham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 14 !!

Vibhum Veda Vedaantha Vedhyam Varishtam

Vibhoothi Pradam Vishrutham Brahma Nishtam

Vibhaaswath Prabhaava Prabhum Pushka Leshtam

Param Jyothi Rupam Bhaje Bhootha Naatham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 15 !!

Parithraana Dhaksham Parabrahma Soothram

Sfuraschaaru Gaathram Bhava Dhwaantha Mithram!

Param Prema Paathram Pavithram Vichithram

Param Jyothi Rupam Bhaje Bhootha Naatham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 16 !!

Paresham Prabhum Purna Kaarunya Rupam

Girishaadi Peeto Jwala Chcharu Deepam !

Sureshaadi Samsevitham Suprathaapam

Param Jyothi Rupam Bhaje Bhootha Naatham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 17 !!

Gurum Purna Lavanya Paadadi Kesham

Gareeyam Mahatkoti Surya Prakasham !

Karaambhoru Hanya Sthavethram Suresham

Param Jyothi Rupam Bhaje Bhootha Naatham !!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 18 !!

Haree Shaana Samyuktha Shakthyey Ka Veeram

Kiraathaava Thaaram Kripaa Paanga Pooram !

Kireetaavath Sojjwalath Pinjcha Bhaaram

Param Jyothi Rupam Bhaje Bhootha Naatham!!

Swamiye Saranam Ayyappa !! 19 !!

Mahaayoga Peeto Jwalantham Mahaantham

Mahaavaakya Saaro Padesham Sushaantham!

Maharshi Praharsha Pradam Jnaana Kaantham

Param Jyothi Rupam Bhaje Bhootha Naatham !!

Agra ganye namaha

Ananta ditya sam kasaya namaha

Anar gharaya namaha

Apra meya para kramaya namaha

Avyaya namaha

Bhad raya namaha

Bhagha vate namaha

Bhaira vaya namaha

Bhak tanu kampine namaha

Bhakta vastalaya namaha

Bhaline namaha

Bhee mashaya para kramaya namaha

Bhho tesaya namaha

Bhoota saivikaya namaha

Bhoota sastre namaha

Bhooti daya namaha

Bhujanga bharan ojwalaya namaha

Brutya namaha

Chatu strusti kala mayaya namaha

Daitya madha naya namaha

Deva sastre namaha

Deva saya namaha

Devaya namaha

Dhanwine namaha

Gaja roodaya namaha

Gana dheesaya namaha

Gana nadaya namaha

Gan eswaraya namaha

Haya aroodaya namaha

Ikshu dhanwine namaha

Jagade eswaraya namaha

Jagan nadhaya namaha

Kala gyanine namaha

Kalpa vruskya namaha

Kama daya namaha

Kamaleshanaya namaha

Kamaleshanaya namaha

Loka bharte namaha

Loka dakshya namaha

Loka karte namaha

Loka asrayaya namaha

Maaya devi sutaya namaha

Maha deva sutaya namaha

Maha devaya namaha

Maha gunaya namaha

Maha mayane namaha

Maha neetaya namaha

Maha prabhuvaye namaha

Maha roopaya namaha

Maha rudraya namaha

Maha saivaya namaha

Maha sasre namaha

Maha stiraya namaha

Maha vrushkaya namaha

Maha yogine namaha

Mahes waraya namaha

Mallik asura Banjakaya namaha

Mantra vedine namaha

Manyaya ngaha

Marutaya namaha

Meeru srunga sama seenaya namaha

Munis angha nishe vitaya namaha

Naga haraya namaha

Naga kesaya namaha

Nana prani nishe vakaya namaha

Nanar oopa dharaya namaha

Nana sastra dharaya namaha

Nana vidya visa radaya namaha

Neeti mate na ma ha Nira strayaya namaha

Nir gunaya namahar

Nityat ruptaya namaha

Nityaya namaha

Papa bhan janaha namaha

Paraat paraya namaha

Para gava vibhun janaya namaha

Para mat mane namaha

Pasu loka bayam karaya namaha

Prakru kataye namaha

Prana datre namaha

Puru shottamaya namaha

Pusha bhanaya namaha

Pushajala poorna samyuk taya namaha

Roha hantre namaha

Roopanai namaha

Rugyajus samadharvana namaha

Samsa ratapa vitchhe trye namaha

Sanatayana namaha

Sarva sastra dhatat wagyanaya namaha

Sanatana gaye namaha

Shan mukha druvaya namaha

Simha roodaya namaha

Srimatai namaha

Subra manya anyujaya namaha

Sugunaya namaha

Tapas wine namaha

Triloka raksha kaya namaha

Tri moor taye namaha

Veera namaha

Veera bhadra saya namaha

Veera bhadra esaya namaha

Vibhoo tidaya namaha

Vidya vrukshaya namaha

Vignes wasi namaha

Vishna vaya namaha

Vishnu poojakaya namaha

Vyoma kesaya namaha

Select quotations

1. “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” – Albert Einstein

2. “Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes.” – Sigmund Freud

3. “In seeking happiness for others, you will find it in yourself.” – Unknown

4. “Love is a verb. Love – the feeling – is a fruit of love, the verb.” – Stephen Covey

5. “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” – Viktor Frankl

6. “He who fears he will suffer, already suffers because he fears.” – Michel De Montaigne

7. “Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill

8. “You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” – Gandhi

9. “When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.” – Helen Keller

10. “Challenges is what makes life interesting and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.” – Joshua J. Marine

11. “If you want happiness for an hour – take a nap. If you want happiness for a day – go fishing. If you want happiness for a year – inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a life time – help someone else.” – Chinese proverb

12. “Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.” – Viktor Frankl

13. “A mind that is stretched by a new experience can never go back to its old dimensions.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes

14. “Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” – Confucius

15. “Many people are passionate, but because of their limiting beliefs about who they are and what they can do, they never take actions that could make their dream a reality” – Anthony Robins

16. “True success is overcoming the fear of being unsuccessful.” – Paul Sweeney

17. “The only way that we can live is if we grow. The only way we can grow is if we change. The only way we can change is if we learn. The only way we can learn is if we are exposed. And the only way that we are exposed is if we throw ourselves into the open.” – C. Joybell

18. “If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.” – Mary Engelbreit

19. “A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.” – George Bernhard Shaw

20. “Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity.” – Henry van Dyke

21. “I would rather die a meaningful death than to live a meaningless life.” – Corazon Aquino

22. “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” – Reinhold Niebuhr

23. “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” – Stephen Covey

24. “We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked and homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved and uncared for is the greatest poverty. We must start in our own homes to remedy this kind of poverty.” – Mother Theresa

25. “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God, which is why we call it the present.” – Bil Keane

26. “Falling in love is not a choice. To stay in love is.” – Unknown

27. “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” – Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

28. “The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” – Albert Einstein

All or none -leader

You do not need to be the top dog to make a difference. Leadership is not meant to be an all-or-nothing proposition.
some say “If I can’t be the captain of the team, then I’ll take my ball and go home.”  some  others define success as being “on top.” As a result, they believe that if they are not on top, they are not successful and become frustrated disillusioned, bitter, and cynical.
individuals can become better leaders wherever they are. Improve your leadership, and you can impact your organization. You can change people’s lives.
You can be someone who adds value. You can learn to influence people at every level of the organization—even if you never get to the top. By helping others, you can help yourself.
The first place to start is by learning to overcome the challenges
Being a leader stuck in the middle brings many challenges. You can learn to navigate them.
Learn the principles and skills to lead the people above, beside, and below you in the organization.

Leadership and freedom

Being the top leader doesn’t mean you have no limits. It doesn’t remove the lid from your potential. It doesn’t matter what job you do or what position you obtain; you will have limits. That’s just the way life is.
When you move up in an organization, the weight of your responsibility increases. In many organizations, as you move up the ladder, you may even find that the amount of responsibility you take on increases faster than the amount of authority you receive.
And you may now have to work with a number of different departments, each with its own problems, skill sets, and cultures. Good leaders go to their people, connect, find common ground, and empower them to succeed. So in some ways, leaders have less freedom as they move up, not more.
If you want to push the limits of your effectiveness, there is a better solution. Learning to lead will blow the lid off of your potential.

Leadership position and influence

Good leaders will gain in influence beyond their stated position. Bad leaders will shrink their influence down so that it is actually less than what originally came with the position. Remember, a position doesn’t make a leader, but a leader can make the position.
You may be able to grant someone a position, but you cannot grant him real leadership. Influence must be earned.
People who have no leadership experience have a tendency to overestimate the importance of a leadership title.