Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

The principles recommended To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie are:
1.Don’t criticize, condemn or complain. Instead of condemning people, lets try to understand them, a lot more profitable and intriguing than criticism: and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and kindness.
2.Give honest and sincere appreciation. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise and people will cherish your words and treasure them and repeat them over a lifetime-repeat them years after you had forgotten them.”
3.Arouse in the other person an eager want. “Self expression is the dominant necessity of human nature. When we have a brilliant idea, instead of making others think it is our, let them stir the idea themselves, they will the regard it as their own and they will like it, and maybe eat a couple helpings of it.”
4.Become genuinely interested in other people. If you want others to like you, if you want to develop real friendships, if you want to help others, at the same time as you help yourself, keep this principle in mind.
5.Smile. Your smile is a messenger of your goodwill. Your smile brightens the lives of all who see it. To someone who has seen a dozen people frown, scowl or turn their faces away, your smile is like the sun breaking through the clouds.
6.Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language. The information we are imparting or the request we are making, takes on a special importance when we approach the situation with the name of the individual.
7.Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. Remember that the people you are talking to are a hundred times more interested in themselves and their wants and problems than they are in you and your problems.
8.Talk in terms of the other person’s interest. Talking in terms of the other person’s interest pays off for both parties.
9.Make the other person feel important – and do in sincerely. Talk to people about themselves and they will listen for hours
10.The only way to get the best of ;an argument is to avoid it.
11.Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say “you’re wrong.” Don’t argue, instead use diplomacy.
12.If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically. Remember the old proverb, “by fighting you never get enough, but by yielding, you get more than you expected.”
13.Begin in a friendly way. Remember what Lincoln said: A drop of honey catches more flies than a gallon of gall.”
14.Get the other person saying “yes,yes” immediately.
15.Let the other person do a great deal of talking.
16.Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
17.Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view. An increased tendency to think always in terms of the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as your own.-if you get only that one thing from this book, it may easily proved to be one of the stepping-stones of your career.
18.Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
19.Appeal to their nobler motives. Make people feel that you consider them honest, upright and fair.
20.Dramatize your ideas.
21.Throw down a challenge. Every successful person wants a chance of self expression, the chance to prove one’s worth.
22.Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
23.Call attention to peoples mistakes indirectly.
24.Talk about your own mistakes, before criticizing the other person.
25.Ask questions, instead of giving direct orders.
26.Let the other person save face.
27.Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation ;and lavish in your praise.”
28.Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
29.Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
30.Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest. Experience’s of most people show that you are more likely to change attitudes this way.

Keys to Leadership

1.The leader leads. He exercises critical judgment, which will have a great impact on his people.
2.The leader defines the company. The leader’s responsibility is to explicitly present and advocate the company’s purposes and goals.
3.The leader inspires. He gives sense and meaning to the job. He makes his people realize, that beyond profit there is an underlying meaning, value, and deeper reason for the work they do.
4.The leader should be the evangelist. He should be able to exercise his influence, to sell the values of ethical conduct.
5.The leader must see the company as a coherent whole. He should be aware of the diversity in the company and bring this together to promote the whole.
6.The leader must know that there is no better way to create a family in the workplace than to encourage the family at home. Harman International introduced the anti-domestic violence program in the company, which reinforces the idea that the company cares.
7.The leader should never underestimate the value of disciplined hard work.
8.The leader empowers subordinates to do their jobs. He should institute programs for the guidance and training of his people. He should always keep the lines of communication open.
9.The leader promotes closure. He should know the right time to get things done.
10.The leader knows what he doesn’t know. The leader is not afraid to ask clarifications, if he does not understand a particular subject.
11.The leader knows the meaning of two minutes. He should respect the time of others and that of his own.
12.The leader teaches.
13.
14.Above all, the leader develops others. As Lao Tzu advanced: “the leader having accomplished great things, the people all feel they did it themselves…”
15.The very best leaders go beyond the mere setting of example. He should be able to cause a leap of imagination and faith in his people.
16.The leader recognizes that people are often at their very best the moment they have been let go. There are times when an employee doesn’t like the work anymore, or he is unable to appreciate how the whole enterprise works- this is the time to set him free

From
Mind Your Own Business A Maverick’s Guide to Business, Leadership and Life By Sidney Harman